Tag: Humor

So let’s look at some not-so serious news, for starters:

...asking the question nobody really needs an answer to.

...and if you think she had “daddy issues” before this...

But some have different ideas on the facility:

...keyword:  Germany.

...wait, you mean Trump’s not going to set up firing squads after he’s elected?
#LostVote

...I guess “hunting over bait” is illegal there.  And somebody remind me again why people like this are still alive, let alone not still in jail.

And in Glueball Jihate News:

...and the Izzies missed out on this Target Of Opportunity?

...and Turkey’s Kurdish separatists are just freedom fighters.  See how that works, you Islamist asshole?

...hey, it’s their First Amendment right.  Now, under the same auspices, let’s talk about taking care of this bitch:

...crucifixion or beheading?  I report, you decide.
#CulturalAppropriation

…my suggestion:  round up everyone involved in this rally, and deport them to Gaza.  Let’s see how they’re treated by Hamas.

And now for some more Girlyman News:

...IBM HQ is in Armonk, NY (he explained unnecessarily).

From the Great Cultural Assimilation Project comes this item:

...so much for that silly “Homeland Security” thing.

Time for the ever-popular (and link-free) INSIGNIFICA:

        

...hey, “EggSlut” isn’t that bad, when you consider the other options, e.g. “Brekkie-Box” , “Fried Faggots” or “Spotted Dick”.

Finally, on thinking about things we’d like to eat, here’s another perennial favorite:

…

Call that “busty”?  Nope.  We want MOAR busty:

…kinda like that.

Erratum:  in last week’s roundup, I suggested that the brewery worker found peeing into the vat may have been employed by Anheuser-Busch.  This was incorrect.  The actual brand of beer thus “affected” was China’s Tsingtao and not Bud Lite.  I regret the incorrect aspersion, because we all know that Bud Lite is most excellent beer, the favorite of young drunken men for decades, who can’t all be wrong. [eyecross]

Also, keyword:  China.

By the way, Tsingtao is the Asian equivalent of Bud Light — very popular, for no apparent reason.

Some more Booze News to smile (or grimace) at:

...panic subsides when the brand is revealed as Bud Lite, where nobody could tell the difference.

...and sales of hip flasks soar.

From the files of Captain Obvious:

...surely not.  Also:

...as did Obama’s ATF, Bush’s ATF and Clinton’s ATF.  Even Trump’s ATF had a go with that bullshit “bump stock” thing.  And finally:

...as do most students, quite frankly.

Legal News:

...show of hands:  who agrees with this punishment and wish we could have it here in Murka?

...thought so.

From the Dept. of Corporate Anchor-Tossing:

…

...and about damn time too, Tribesters (Tribe Readers excluded, for obvious reasons).

...I’m “triggered” by many things, e.g. sexual perverts teaching our children, but that doesn’t mean I’m just going to go out and whack a couple of Red Sox fans at random. Here’s another thing that triggers me:

...my suggestion for the Maine cops:  find this murderous bastard, then shoot him dead, whether he surrenders or not.  Spare us all the hassle and expense, willya?

…

And in Global Warming Climate Cooling Change© News:

...should never have been there in the first fucking place.

...big deal. Anyone can plan ahead for the next three months.

And there’s always INSIGNIFICA:

   

…I’m struggling to see the actual crime, here.

...fully clothed?

   

…and that’s the end of Train Smash News.