Dept. Of Righteous Shootings

Mostly, I define a self-defense shooting as Righteous only when the goblin dies, but I’ll make an exception in this case:

When convenience store owner Craig Cope noticed on surveillance cameras that armed men were going to enter his store, he moved strategically around the counter and grabbed his shotgun.
Cope, video footage shows, quickly fired at the first armed suspect who entered the store, sending him and the other men fleeing.
“He shot my arm off!” one of the armed suspects is heard yelling on obtained surveillance footage.

Should have been your fucking head, is all I have to say.  But, this wounding was actually a Good Thing, because it led to all four scumbags being arrested at the hospital later.

The embedded video at the link will make y’all giggle like schoolgirls.

Dept. Of Righteous Shootings

When your ex-girlfriend (who has a restraining order against you) takes refuge in your neighbor’s house, do not try to break into that house to get to her.  Or, take your chances:

When he tried to break into the house, the homeowner shot and killed him and he was found dead on the back porch by police.

The homeowner has not been charged.

As it should be.  Scratch one violent asshole and some applause, please, for Our Hero.

Dept. Of Righteous Shootings

I don’t normally feature early reports on this kind of thing because circumstances may change after further investigation, but it’s a slow news day, so here we go:

Law enforcement received a 911 call indicating someone had allegedly tried to break into the home and had been shot. Pickaway County deputies arrived to find the alleged intruder was deceased inside the home.

On Monday morning, Pickaway County Sheriff Matthew O. Hafey used a Facebook post to provide further information, noting the 911 caller reported a male had broken into the home.

Hafey outlined, “Upon the Deputies’ arrival, a male was found to be deceased inside of the home.”

Good Guy 1, Goblin 0.  As it should be.

Dept. Of Righteous Shootings

Is there a man alive* who doesn’t get the Warm ‘N Fuzzies from reading this?

The St. Louis Post-Dispatch notes that the alleged robber entered the store and “announced a robbery.” He then allegedly put a knife to the clerk’s throat and demanded money from the cash register.

At one point during the incident a customer who had just exited the store looked through the window and saw the suspect allegedly dragging the clerk “while she was screaming.”

The customer grabbed a pistol from his vehicle, went inside, and confronted the suspect.

The suspect then allegedly walked toward the customer, holding a backpack in outstretched arms and saying, “I have something for you.”

The customer opened fire and the suspect collapsed.

The suspect was pronounced dead at the scene.

When all you can complain about is the grammar (“exited the store”?), it’s a happy day indeed.

Well, except for the “alleged” goblin, but fuck him.


*unless you’re in the Uvalde Police Department, that is.

Dept. Of Righteous Shootings

Most of the time, Righteous Shootings take place inside a house, as a homeowner protects life and home against the predations of goblins intent on unauthorized property redistribution and / or unwanted sexual advances, etc.

But this is America, where a mall can also feature such an event:

Breitbart News reported that a suspect opened fire in the Greenwood Park Mall food court around 6 p.m.

The attacker was able to kill three people before a 22-year-old armed citizen intervened, shooting the attacker dead.

Bravo, kid.  We’re all proud of you.  As are the police:

Greenwood, Indiana, police chief Jim Ison described the 22-year-old who shot and killed a mall attacker as the “hero of the day.”

You betcha, Chief.  Only in some disgusting country (e.g. New York) could someone be arrested for doing something like this.

However:

The Simon Property Group, which owns the mall, states in its code of conduct that no weapons are allowed at their shopping centers. The policy was last updated in April 2020.

Bet they’re glad someone broke their pissy little rule now.  And they are:

“We grieve for the victims of yesterday’s horrific tragedy in Greenwood. Violence has no place in this or any other community. We are grateful for the strong response of the first responders, including the heroic actions of the Good Samaritan who stopped the suspect.”

Uh huh.  I’ve seldom obeyed the “no weapons” signs anyway, unless there are metal detectors inside.