Here’s one that got me thinking:
Scientists have found ancient [herpes] viruses locked inside Neanderthal bones that are 50,000 years old — and experts could be set to recreate them. The team who made the discovery now plan to try and synthesize these viruses to see how they compare to modern ones.
Clearly, the modern, largely-incurable herpes viruses aren’t enough for us to deal with.
Okay, let’s have them explain themselves:
“These Jurassic Park-like viruses could then be studied for their reproductive and pathogenic traits and compared to present-day counterparts.”
Actually, no. The last fucking thing we need is to find out how they reproduced themselves. Why? Because once we do, the shit will be able to reproduce itself.
Wuhan, anyone?
The hell with that. I’m very supportive of Scientific Curiosity and all that, but sometimes you just have to draw the line.
And frankly, if we’re going to bring old stuff back to life, what’s wrong with resurrecting the mid-1950-era Mercedes 300 SC?
They could be made in all pretty colors, with- or without soft tops, etc., etc.
Oh wait, I forgot: that’s engineering, not !Science!
Still, I put it to my Readers that having the world flooded with fine 300 SCs would be far more beneficial to life than doing the same with a 50,000-year-old pox.
Feel free to propose other extinct things you’d like to bring back to the modern world; but I have to warn y’all, I got fibs on crucifixion.
