Another Nail In The Male Coffin

There’s a massive danger to Earth, uncovered by !Scientists!:

Men are bad for the planet, a controversial new study has claimed.

Researchers from 13 countries have joined forces on a new paper, titled ‘Men, masculinities, and the planet at the end of (M)Anthropocene.’  According to the experts, men tend to have a greater carbon footprint than women, largely through travel, transportation, and tourism.  Blokes are also less concerned with climate change – and less willing to change their everyday practices to fix it. 

No shit.  We’re too busy building stuff, moving stuff, drilling for stuff and in general making the planet habitable for everyone.  But wait, we’re doing even MOAR Evil Things!

In addition, typically ‘manly’ activities negatively impact both the environment and the climate.  This includes things like fishing and hunting, as well as meat consumption.  ‘Men tend to be more involved in owning, managing, controlling heavy, chemical, carbon–based, industrialized agriculture, high environmental impact and extractive industries, and of course militarism, with its own devastating environmental effects.’

However did they miss “car racing”?  And only in the fevered mind of academia would hunting and fishing be a danger to the environment, when any fule kno that practitioners of the above are the most ardent supporters of environmental protection.

Of course, it’s all dressed up in the usual pseudo-scientific gobbledegook:

Professor Jeff Hearn, professor of sociology in Huddersfield’s Department of Social and Psychological Sciences, said: ‘There is now plenty of research that shows clear negative impacts of some men’s behavior on the environment and climate.  What is astonishing is how this aspect does not figure in most debate and policy in a more sustainable world.’

That’s because “most debate and policy” concerns itself with more important issues, such as whether Sidney Sweeney’s ever going to do OnlyFans.

On that topic:  they also missed “wanking”.  I’m not sure how that lovely activity is linked to Global Warming Climate Cooling Change©, but I am sure that as we speak there is a group of some asshole “scientists” busy working on a (taxpayer-funded) study on the topic.

People are being paid — in thirteen countries, no less — to produce bullshit like this.

Fach.

My Favorite Foods Are Gonna Kill Me

According to !SCIENCE!, two of my favorite foods are dangerous:

Croissants, baguettes and even breakfast cereals could be exposing millions to a cancer-linked toxic metal, French health chiefs have warned.

A major report has raised alarm over levels of cadmium in everyday foods, with experts saying nearly half of the French population may be consuming ‘concerning’ amounts through their diet alone.

The heavy metal, which is found in fertilizers used in modern farming, can build up in soil and enter staple foods eaten daily by millions.

Scientists say products ranging from bread and pastries to pasta, rice and potatoes are among the biggest sources of exposure, with diet accounting for up to 98 per cent of intake in non-smokers.

The findings, published by France’s food safety agency ANSES, have been described as ‘worrying’, with warnings the risks could grow if no action is taken.

Cadmium has been linked to a range of cancers, including those affecting the pancreas, bladder, prostate and breast. It has also been associated with brittle bones, kidney damage and cardiovascular disease.

Géraldine Carne, an expertise coordinator at the agency, warned that long-term health impacts are likely to increase if exposure is not reduced.

Okay, so it’s not just croissants and baguettes that could be dangerous because of this cadmium stuff, but just about every agricultural product we eat.

So in essence, we’re all gonna DIIIIEEEEE from eating because #CadmiumBadShit.

Phew… for a moment I thought I was going to have to cut down on baguettes and croissants.

Just for the record:  French baguette — as made by my local grocery store, Market Street — is the only bread I eat, except when I’m eating croissants (usually from Kroger or Dunkin Donuts) for Saturday/Sunday brekkie.  I seldom put any other breads in my mouth, unless I’m feeling rich and happen to be close to a Central Market store, in which case I get a Batard loaf.  (I wrote about my love of bread back in 2019, in case anyone’s interested, and very little has changed since then. #SetInMyWays #SurpriseSurprise)

Anyway, that reminds me:  I’m running low on baguette, so if you’ll excuse me…

…I’m going to get some on my way back from the range.

Science

Finally, an academic study that keeps us abreast of things:

Scientists have uncovered why women’s breasts are so large compared to other animals.

You all know what’s coming next, right?

Color, you say?  Oh, why not…

And finally, a couple of more recent vintage:

I know, I know:  it’s been a shamefully long time since we saw la bella  Sophia on this here back porch of mine.  I apologize for this egregious omission.

…and oh yeah, about that scientific reason why wimmen’s breasteses are so gloriously abundant:

According to a team from the University of Oulu, Finland, breasts may have evolved to help newborns. Human breasts sit at an elevated temperature, protecting a newborn from hypothermia. What’s more, the size and shape of the breast allows for broad contact surface – enhancing the heat transfer from mother to child.

And I always thought it was to help keep men excited and wanting to procreate.  Silly me.

Finishing The Job

This is interesting:

Burmese pythons, one of the world’s largest snakes, are also one of the most problematic invasive species in South Florida. First spotted in the Florida Everglades in the 1970s, the snakes were introduced, either accidentally or intentionally, through the exotic pet trade.

Since then, pythons have become top predators in the local food ecosystem. Despite the fact that they now exist throughout much of South Florida, they remain difficult to track down. That means researchers and conservationists need to find creative ways to lure them out into the open. 

And by creative, we mean really creative—and University of Florida (UF) researchers clearly understood the assignment.

Researchers led by UF professor of wildlife ecology and conservation Robert McCleery have released 40 solar-powered, remote-controlled robot bunnies in South Florida this month. The researchers replaced the plush toy’s stuffing with motors and heaters to imitate the motions and body temperatures of one of pythons’ favorite snacks: marsh rabbits.

I’m no professor of anything, but it seems to me that these boffins are missing a trick, here.  It’s all very well to “lure” these giant worms out into the open, but it’s pretty much useless when it comes to actually killing the loathsome creatures.

My suggestion:  a small explosive charge — it doesn’t have to be greater than, say, that of a large bottle rocket — inserted into the robo-bunnies, triggered by pressure on the outer frame.  This will do one of two things:  blow the snake’s head off when/if it bites the bunny;  or else blow the snake apart when it crushes the thing prior to ingestion.  Either outcome is satisfactory.

Of course, this will never happen because reasons.

Nice Try, Nerds

Another breathless warning from some joyless dorks:

Whether it’s a mature cheddar or a crumbly feta, cheese is one of the most beloved foods around the world.  But in news that will concern fans of the moreish treat, scientists have issued an urgent warning about eating cheese. 

For the first time, a groundbreaking study has revealed that these dairy products are ‘ripe in microplastics’.  Scientists believe the tiny plastic particles, measuring 5mm or smaller, could be entering cheese at various stages of production.  Their analysis revealed that the most contaminated products were ripened cheeses – those aged for more than four months – with a staggering 1,857 plastic particles per kilogram.

For comparison, that means a ripened cheese contains around 45 times more microplastics than bottled water.

Yeah, and 45 times “pretty much zip” is still close to nothing.

Since plastics contain chemicals known to be toxic or carcinogenic, scientists are concerned that a buildup of microplastics could damage tissues in our bodies.

“Could”.  Yeah, well at my age I pretty much don’t care, because at some point something’s going to kill me off anyway.  And seeing that these microplastic thingies are pretty much ubiquitous in all food types, I’ll just carry on eating this, my favorite kind of food.

Your opinion may vary, and I don’t care.

Handing Over The Reins

Read this story and see if you don’t get a slow burn, or even an RCOB:

An Australian small business owner says she lost about $50,000 after Instagram suspended her accounts over what she describes as an innocent photo of three dogs.

Rochelle Marinato, managing director at Pilates World Australia, recently received an email from Instagram’s parent company Meta stating her accounts had been suspended because the image breached community guidelines relating to ‘child sexual exploitation, abuse and nudity’.

The photo had been mistakenly flagged by an AI moderator which confused the image of the dogs with those of children.

She appealed the decision and sent 22 emails to Meta, but received no assistance from the global tech giant, which owns Instagram, Facebook, Threads, Messenger and WhatsApp.

Ms Marinato claimed her story was just one of many and that the problem was widespread.

She also said it was impossible to talk to a human at Meta to explain her situation.

‘I couldn’t get a human to look at it. Clearly any human that looks at this photo is going to know it’s completely innocent,’ she said. 

‘You can’t contact a human at Meta. There’s no phone number, there’s no email, there’s nothing and you’re literally left in the dark.’ 

To paraphrase Insty:  And Skynet smirks.