Ones you’d like to see, in Comments. Will not be moderated or censored.
Update: Damn, after reading some of y’all’s comments, I feel like a big wussy by comparison.
Category: The Worst
3 Worst Presents
…for your 12-year-old:
1) Exercise equipment:
2) Literature:
3) Handgun:
…when it’s a replica. (Cliff Notes: how to get your ass shot by the police.)
Feel free to add your suggestions in Comments.
Worst Packed Lunches
Inspired by this tale of woe, list the 3 worst combinations (main, snack & drink) you could put in your 8-year-old kid’s school lunchbox. You can select according to taste, nutritional “value” or smell, your choice.
Mine:
- Vegan “hamburger” / olives / carton of skim milk
- Slim Jim / coconut snowball / lemon Kool-Aid
- Canned anchovies / soda crackers / can of club soda
Extra points if you actually have given them to your kids in the past, and my apologies if I’ve made anyone feel ill.
Another Time, Another Place
…I see that old familiar face:
Not that I give a rat’s ass about Madonna — her music, her multicolored family or her Play-Doh face — but sheesh….
And I apologize for the above. Let’s try to mindscrape that foulness with something a lot less frightening:
Immaculate Conception?
For those who scoff at the concept of “immaculate conception”, please explain this little situation:
A party-loving student had no idea she was pregnant, believing she had simply ‘become a bit fat’ at university by drinking ‘almost every night’ – until she suddenly gave birth.
Niamh Hearn’s life turned upside down in August 2022 when the then 20-year-old was admitted to hospital with suspected appendicitis – and left hospital with a newborn baby.
The now 21-year-old, who lives in York, admitted to binge drinking and smoking throughout her pregnancy — attending a festival and a pub crawl all while unknowingly pregnant with her son.
So far, so good; until you see the pics of said totty. (warning: extreme foulness in link, you have been warned)
I know that some (okay, lots of) guys will make the old flesh insertion into pretty much anything, especially after a few shots of tequila etc.
But seriously?
The only good thing is that Mummy Dearest is unlikely to go after child support, because she won’t be able to narrow the field, so to speak — but if she does, and Daddy is exposed, his punishment will be a lot more than financial.
Yikes.
3 Worst Questions
Okay, here’s a participation game which is prompted by this little snippet (no link because reasons):
So, Gentle Readers: what are the three ugliest, rudest, most impertinent and foul questions you could ask of His Royal Gingerness?
Yeah, I know, nobody gives a shit about this emasculated little Brit woketwerp or his horrible Hollywood slutwife. Have some fun. Winner gets a prize TBD.