Category: Mocking Furriners

Fracture Lines

Gummint, Mocking Furriners

Looks like the Euros are having a problem or two:

The French blame the Germans and the Germans blame the French.  The Eastern Europeans blame the Western Europeans.  The Southern Europeans blame the North.  And everyone blames the officials in Belgium.

As Douglas Murray adds:  “In other words, business as usual.”

Once again, we see proof (if any were needed) that massive bureaucracies don’t respond well to a crisis.  In this case, the Euros thought that they could get both research and supplies of Chinkvirus vaccines from the UK, but when the Brits told them to shove it — all hail Brexit! — the Euros were left holding the short end of the stick, and squabbling ensued.

The lesson is well learned Over Here, for all those who think that Big Gummint is the answer to our woes.  In a crisis, it seldom is.

 

Old Times, Good Times

Health, Mocking Furriners

This made me expel some breakfast gin out of my nose:

German officials are being forced to convert refugee camps into the new network of Covid detention facilities, because all the really good camps are currently filled with tourists taking photos and Jews making documentaries.  It’s a lesson that every oppressive regime needs to learn:  Don’t turn your best concentration camps into museums;  you never know when they might be needed again.

Arbeit macht Krankfrei, in other words.

Delicious.

 

Quote Of The Day

Mocking Furriners, QOTD

From Teddy Dalrymple:

“With luck, the mass impoverishment that is quite likely to strike Great Britain in the near future will prevent the British from going abroad in any numbers, thus slightly raising the cultural level of the rest of the world.”

When I emigrated , the following was written on the Bon Voyage  card presented to me by my former colleagues:

“Kim is leaving South Africa for the United States, thus raising the average IQ of both countries.”

Who said statisticians have no sense of humor?

3 Inexplicable Things About Brexit

3 Inexplicable Things, Mocking Furriners

The latest in this series:

  • Why it’s taken so long for the Brits to tell Germans, Frogs and other assorted Dago countries just to fuck off.
  • Why, after Brexit, the Brits will continue to use the European-spawned metric system instead of the fine Imperial one they themselves created.
  • Why there’s such a to-do about fishing territories.  Considering that the entire EU has a navy of a size comparable to Rhode Island’s, and even though the Royal Navy certainly isn’t what it used to be, I would have thought that the British negotiating position re: fishing would be:  “If you chaps fish where we don’t want you to fish, we’ll blow your ships out of the water.”

Feel free to express your own areas of puzzlement about Brexit in Comments.

Divided By A Common Language

Mocking Furriners, Travels

That’s because the average town in Britishland has clearly-defined boundaries, where Town Planning forbids any kind of development outside those limits.

Here in the Land Of Da Free, our towns sprawl all over the fucking place, and (e.g. in Plano) you can drive around all day, not see a business of any kind, and still technically be “in town”.

The Germans, of course, have it down pat.  If you take the Ausfahrt  off the Autobahn  to, say, Stuttgart, you just follow the signs which say Zentrum  and you’ll end up in the main business center of town.

Which, by the way, the Brits with their love of inscrutable acronyms refer to as the “CBD” (central business district), only they don’t always use street signs to direct you there.  You get downtown by guesswork and luck.  Don’t ever stop and ask for directions, because the local yokels think it’s great fun to send you into a series of one-way streets and cul-de-sacs  (which is what signs do say, and not “dead ends”) until you wish Hitler had got the job done and flattened the place, back during the Slight Disturbances Of The Early Forties.

Not that I’m bitter about it, or anything.  When you finally get there, it’s all worth it.

…right up until you try to find parking.