Among the several things about Modern Life that make me ultra-peevish is this thing about people walking around carrying drinks — water bottles, Yeti flasks, what have you — and I want to ask people (loudly) whether they think they’re going to die of thirst before they can get to the nearest tap or drinking fountain. Mostly, this applies to women, the precious creatures, because Teh Experts tell us that We Must Remain Hydrated, Lest We Die.
Maybe when you’re crossing the fucking Mojave Desert, but not when you’re crossing the street in Dallas or Los Angeles.
However, let it not be said that I’m completely intolerant in this regard. I am prepared, for instance, to make exceptions to my “Stop acting like a camel!” gripe in circumstances such as these:
…although I should also point out that not all women seem to need that oh-so important drink in their hand every time they step outdoors:
…and of course, there are those poor things in obvious need of sustenance:
I mean, I wouldn’t want y’all to think I was that Krool & Hartless, after all.
But in all honesty, if you’re that thirsty, get off the street and find a place to assuage your thirst — and there are many of them, in cities all over the world. Places like these:
It’s really not too much to ask.
Thanks for the mammaries!
Oh, Kim! You and I may share a bench in Hell, you for offering temptation, and me for looking. If I get there first, I’ll try to save a seat near the air conditioner.
My beloved wife carries a battered old pink insulated water bottle everywhere. It drives me nuts because of all the other mounds of stuff she ‘might need’ in her ‘purse’, aka major luggage, which she also takes everywhere.
I’m going to send a photo of that damn pink bottle next to a full water glass in a nice restaurant next time we go out.
My enhanced sense of ah, observation has me pondering the correlation between a drink in hand and prodigious proportions in the mammicular region…
I applaud your analytical curiosity.
Kim,
3 questions
Who is the brunette in the ripped knees blue jeans holding the ice cream cup?
Who is the final woman, wearing a long robe like thing, peach lingerie showing, dirty blonde hair, bracelet around left ankle, holding a drink in her left hand?
Or are these random pics of women’s from the internets?
Totally random, no names.
Let me guess. The search phrase was “women with big cups”, right?
1 girl 2 cups
(Referencing if anyone here remembers the whole 2 girls 1 cup video from many moons ago)
Six:
Story on Miss FXCK TOY?
And it doesn’t need to be anything close to reality, I just want a story.
Marge, you can say FUCK on this website.
Your choice of women in the pics bely most of my experience with water bottle women. Most I see are thin-lipped Save the Smelt eco-liberal loonies or else hard core organic-only gym rats with too-tight tights and projecting bones to prove my assumption.
Your powers of observation are excellent.
I haven’t noticed these birds.
I do drink coffee, tea or water while driving and at my desk at work. The only other time I bring stuff like that with me is on a hike. Why bring your own drink to a restaurant? They have drinks there!