5 Worst Ways To Begin A Speech

Ranked in ascending order of dreadfulness:

  • “Heil Hitler!”
  • “As the best man, let me start by apologizing to everyone that the groom didn’t show up for the ceremony today…”
  • “Ladies and gentlemen, and those who’ve had the operation…”
  • “Before I start my speech, let me first tell you the joke about the nigger, the Jewboy and the faggot…”
  • “Tonight I want to explain how I lost the election to Donald Trump…”

Your own suggestions in Comments, as always.

One comment

  1. Oh, come on. That next-to-last one should be “…the nigger, the kike, and the faggot…” You’re slipping! 🙂

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