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Tag: Humor
Stuff that makes me laugh
Quote Of The Day
Just… damn.
“Everything is over and done with. The divorce will take a little more time but my money is in my retirement account. My ex is out of my house. And my cousin can go fuck herself.”
Now read all about it. FAFO Supreme, times two.
News Roundup
And speaking of speeding:
...”than expected” is now de rigueur in statements like this.
From our Crime Reports:
...reminding me of my support of the death penalty for pedophilia.
...I guess all those anti-cop defunding laws are working out just as we expected, but they didn’t.
...keywords: New Orleans.
...keywords: Los Angeles.
...keyword: wait — Brooklyn?
This week’s PANIC ATTACK!!:
…wait, what happened to Global Cooling Climate Warming Change© and The Next Big Pandemic?
In Woke News:
...yeah, just follow the link if you don’t believe me.
In the Heart Of Stone Dept.:
...quit that unseemly giggling, willya?
…
(no link)
...and when I read success stories like this, it makes me proud to be an American.
...Terrible Tragedy or Great Escape? I report, you decide.
And in a world of 
...that’s no way to talk about London.
Monday Funnies
Caught unawares by the sudden arrival of Monday, were we?
Well, never mind. Let’s continue along the same track, so to speak:
News Roundup
Let’s start out with a trip aboard this week’s EVERYBODY PANIC!!! Express:
...note the weasel words “might be”. (PFA = Pretty Fucking Awful — it’s a scientific term.)
And here’s something to make the Frogs and other Euros panic:
...won’t happen, of course; the Frogs will just cheat those 13 points away.
[#Biden2020]
Meanwhile, just over the French border :
...keyword: Belgium.
In Health News:
…and for once I’m not being sarcastic.
...[insert “Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!” joke here]
In the Unforeseen Circumstances section:
...Jeffery Epstein was unavailable for comment. And more from Boeing Land:
...leaking like their profit margins, no doubt, the woke DEI bastards.
#SellBoeingStock
Some more Wokery Titbits:
...aaaaaannndddd this would also be the time to sell those CVS shares in your portfolio.
...well, let’s pause here and spare a thought for all those boyfriends and husbands who are caught in the fallout.
...let ’em eat carrots.
Our Advice Column:
...spoiler alert: it’s 85. Or should be.
And now, in link-free 
...typo, perhaps?
#BadEyes #OldFart
Apparently, the Princess of Wales has been busted for altering a family pic:
And finally, speaking of fine superstructures, here’s Canucki chick Mikayla Demaiter:
And that’s it for the news.
Out Of Africa
I am SO proud…