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Bunny Boilers

Men & Women

Over at Britain’s The Sun  litterbox-liner, there’s a regular column devoted to sex (of course) under the monicker of “Dear Deidre”.  Now I happen to think that the “letters” are total fiction (see:  Penthouse Letters etc.), but that doesn’t mean that the situations are irrelevant. [/Dan Rather]

Here’s one example:  a guy starts bonking someone not his wife, for all the usual reasons.  At first, it’s happy-happy-fun-fun times:

She was wearing just a dressing gown when I got there. She led me to her bedroom and we had sex. She clearly loved it and so did I.

But:

…she became very demanding and started expecting sex three or four times a week.
I found it difficult to keep up with her and even got Viagra-type pills off the internet.

I know:  we should all be so lucky, right? Read on:

I’ve tried to cut down seeing my lover to once a week but she says that isn’t enough.
She wants us to get together properly and drops hints that she will tell my wife what we have been doing if I attempt to back away.
It was great at first but she scares me now.

Yeah, he deserves everything that happens to him, the louse etc. etc.  But let me tell you:  something like this happened to me many years ago — not as a husband, thank gawd, but as a boyfriend with a sorta-steady girlfriend — and it was a horrible situation.

It ended badly (no details necessary) — at least in a more-or-less civilized fashion — but I should point out that this doesn’t happen every time.  More often than not, lives are ruined by shit like this.  It’s the obverse of the jilted ex-boyfriend stalking the woman and his replacement, and the really bad thing about situations like this is that they sometimes don’t end violently, but they often do.

And it’s easy to be all virtuous and self-righteous, but if I know one thing about men, it’s that we fuck up, sometimes even when we know better.

I have a theory that every man has lurking out there, at least one woman who has the power to make him lose his reason.  Some men never meet that woman, and they are the lucky ones.  Others do, and fall.  I have encountered four.  The only positive thing about getting to my age is that after while you get to recognize these dangerous women and are prepared for the thunderbolt.  And even then, you could still screw up.  There are no guarantees.  It’s a jungle, and sometimes we men are not the predators, but the prey.

As Desk Sergeant Phil Esterhaus used to say every day:  be careful out there.

Just Shoot A Few

Anarchist thugs, BaconLettuceMayo, Law and Order

I see that GeorgiaGov Kemp has mobilized the state’s National Guard:

“Peaceful protests were hijacked by criminals with a dangerous, destructive agenda. Now, innocent Georgians are being targeted, shot, and left for dead,” Kemp said in a statement Monday. “This lawlessness must be stopped and order restored in our capital city.”
The National Guard troops will “provide support” at state buildings, including the Georgia State Capitol, Georgia Department of Public Safety Headquarters, and Governor’s Mansion, the governor’s statement said. The additional support is aimed at freeing up state law enforcement to increase patrols on roads and in communities, particularly in Atlanta.

I wish the Guard wasn’t being sent to protect the governor’s mansion;  I’d pay good money to see Kemp himself standing outside the place, holding an Evil Black Rifle like that muppet in St. Louis.

Government Told To Fuck Off

Gummint

There are times when one should feel sorry for the apparatchiks of our beloved federal- and state governments, because few people are taking them seriously anymore.

Okay, that was a joke;  1) nobody loves them except the Swampies themselves, and 2) there’s no reason to feel sorry for them because, in the manner of idiots everywhere, their problems are self-inflicted by poor choices.  Here’s one (of many).

After  having clamped down on our freedoms with the excuse of OMG The Chinkvirus, many local gummints outlawed all private firework displays for July 4th.  Result:  the skies lit up like it was WWIII — even (or especially) in liberal havens like Los Angeles.

Now, amidst breathless shrieking from the Jackals Of The Press (never missing any excuse to foretell doom ‘n gloom because headlines / clickbait), Gummint is threatening to enforce another lockdown, Just In Case And If It Saves Just One Life It’s Worth It, Seriously.  Here’s my own prophecy of America’s likely response to said coming lockdowns:

As a rule, we Murkins are a law-abiding lot (excepting Leftist assholes, always), but the laws have to make sense before we follow them — and indeed, the (un-Constitutional) regulations and such laid down by Leftist fuckwits like CalifornicateGov Newsom, MichigaNazi Witmer and ILGov Fatboi all had one thing in common:  they fucked up the economy for very little tangible benefit.

Add to that the propensity of the aforementioned and their minions to be the lickspittles of lawless mobs like Pantifa and BaconLettuceTomato, and it’s small wonder that ordinary Americans looked at all this carnage and Wokedom, and said in unison:  “Fuck that shit.”  Then they went out and let off fireworks, and cheered our President’s stirring July 4th speech to the echoes.

Even here in Texas, where we kinda-sorta don’t mind TexGov Abbott, we still don’t trust our local bureaucrats much (it’s in our state constitution: the most restrictive social compact in the world).  I note with interest that local entities are going softly-softly on the lockdown business, mostly because 1) while the infection rate seems to be climbing, the death toll is dropping and b) I suspect that most Texans are going to ignore any Chinkvirus: Round Two Everybody Panic, other than doing what makes the most sense:  wearing PPE masks, sanitizing common areas and not sneezing all over other people in public.

We could have prevented most of the infection uptick, I suspect, by shooting all the Pantifa Commies and rioting looters  as soon as they started with their reindeer games in the streets, then hosing down their twitching corpses with hydrochloric acid  bleach, but no doubt someone would have had a problem with this.

Or we could have just nuked all those Democrat-controlled cities (quit that cheering) at the very beginning, but some might call this remedy too extreme as well.

Just nobody on this Internet back porch.

Perils Of Illiteracy

Grammar Nazism

Here’s a thought which starts off well, and ends in unintentional hilarity.

“Meanwhile, moving to an unknown place is far from out of character. This time four years ago, I packed up my car in Ohio and drove out west with no plans for two months. In 2018 I hitchhiked around south Peru. Later that summer I landed in Bali with no agenda and a month to spare. While island hopping in Gili, I was caught near the center of an earthquake when I was far from sober prompting me to evacuate.”

You see, “to evacuate” means to empty out, or to be emptied out.  Towns and buildings may be evacuated (by emptying them of people, for instance), but people aren’t evacuated, unless some form of laxative, diuretic or similar are in the picture.

So when the idiot quoted says “I was caught near the center of an earthquake when I was far from sober prompting me to evacuate”, what comes across is actually “I was caught near the center of an earthquake when I was far from sober prompting me to shit myself”  — funny, but I don’t think that’s quite what he was trying to say.

And in The Federalist, too… [sigh]