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“Dear Dr. Kim”

Advice

“Dear Dr. Kim,
“Last week I was out for my daily 5-mile walk when some woman shouted at me for not wearing a face mask.  Some background:  it’s not a crowded place — in fact, most days I don’t see anyone at all out there — so I really don’t see what the fuss is all about.  My question:  what’s the proper response when someone scolds me for not wearing a mask?  Should I apologize, or just say nothing and move on?”
— Ashamed, Oregon

Dear Shameful,

You have two problems here;  one is low self-esteem, and the other is aimlessness.  In the first case, the proper response to one of these Karens is to shout “FUCK YOU!” back at them, as loudly as you possibly can.  If they respond, or start getting silly about it, then shout, “I’m so glad you’re wearing a mask, because I bet you’re fucking UGLY underneath that thing.”  Then, as a last resort, pepper-spray them in the face if they get close to you in an aggressive manner.

As for your other problem:  what the fuck are you doing walking around with no destination in mind?  Just so you know:  a five-mile walk to a decent pub is fine — a little excessive, maybe, but if the pub is good enough, worth the sacrifice.  Ditto, a five-mile stalk while hunting is also permissible because there’s a chance of a dead animal at the end of it — but a five-mile walk just for the sake of walking is a total waste of time and for that, you should be ashamed of yourself.  If you really have to walk that far but don’t drink [shudder] or it’s not hunting season, then take up golf.  Ordinarily, I don’t recommend golf to anyone because, well, golf;  but yours is an extreme case — and  I guarantee you:  nobody you meet on the golf course is going to scold you for not wearing a mask.

Oh, And By The Way: Fuck You

Culture, Literature, Modernism, Two-Minute Hate

If anything can bring on a RCOB Moment, bullshit like this would be in the Top 3:

NPR Advises Readers to ’Decolonize” Their Bookshelves by Removing White Authors

If I did that, all I’d be left with are books by Thomas Sowell and Walter Williams.  Just so we’re clear on what’s being discussed here:

Since that pic was taken, quite a few have since been passed out to the Ungrateful Wretched Children (e.g. the Great Books collection on the right, snatched up by the Son&Heir, and on the top right, the Classic Novels, appropriated by Daughter).

If those motherfucking Commies at NPR think I’m going to “decolonize” my book collection to rid myself of “the colonialist ideas of narrative, storytelling, and literature”, I have news for them.  What they call “colonialist”, I call “classical” — they can’t just change the language to fit their little politically-correct narrative.

Well actually, they can — I just don’t have to go along with it.  And I won’t.

Here’s a thought.  If we’re going to get all purge-y and such, let’s not fuck around with bookcases.  Let’s get serious:

Quote Of The Day

Literature, QOTD

From Stephen Green:

“All hell is going to break loose when they find out that I decided to tackle Proust during the shutdown.”

Damn, now that’s a bad shutdown.  No man should ever be so reduced as to having to read Marcel Proust.

Clearly, the VodkaPundit ran out of vodka during his isolation.

Take ‘Em

Mocking Furriners

From a Lefty Canuckipol:

Elizabeth May, leader of the Green Party in the Canadian parliament, has called on Justin Trudeau to accept any ethnic minority person from the United States who comes to Canada claiming asylum because President Trump has made the country unsafe.

Oh be still, my beating heart.  Hell, we’ll even supply the buses, trains and airliners for the asylum-seekers.

Sorry, FredZ.  But we’d welcome you and other Canucki conservatives of your ilk in return — the buses etc. can just bring you back on their return trip (after the necessary fumigation, of course).  And yes, your guns would be quite welcome.  (Offer not valid for anyone from Toronto, or people who prefer to speak French over English.)

I think that sounds fair.

Pharoah Had It Easy

Bad News

2020 has been interesting, plague-wise:

First, the Chinkvirus:

Next, Asian Murder Hornets:

Then, an infestation of BLM/Pantifas:

What could possibly come next in this foul year?

Yup.

Which means that Florida and all the other Gulf of Mexico states are officially banned.

Mail Offer

Funny Stuff, The Gun Thing

This arrived in my Inbox over the weekend:

Because nothing says “Responsible Gun Ownership” like guns and booze.  And nothing says “Real America” like trying to bribe me with cheap Made-In-China tat.

That said, if the NRA idiots had a Gin Club…

…I still wouldn’t renew my membership.