Tag: Humor

Stuff that makes me laugh

News From Austin

Legal Stuff, The Gun Thing

…where the Texas Legislature is doing the People’s bidding:

Earlier today, the House approved Senate Bill 19, by an 86-60 vote, that discourages banks, payment processors, insurers, and other financial services providers from discriminating against members of the firearm and ammunition industries. The legislation prohibits businesses that engage in this practice from contracting with governmental entities in the Lone Star State. Taxpayer dollars should not be used to benefit the bottom-line of corporations that are actively working to erode the Second Amendment rights of law-abiding Texans. The measure, a priority of Lt. Governor Patrick, now goes back to the Senate for consideration of House amendments.

Hubba hubba.  And if this passes, and one of those bastards ever tries to mess with my gun purchases or anything like that, it’s to the TxAG’s office I’ll be sending my next email.

News Roundup

Bad News

With news so bad, you’ll puke.  Today, we start off with a large helping of INSIGNIFICA (with links and comments, this time):


…daughter “JAMES”?  Poor kid doesn’t stand a chance.


…file under “Nobody’s Business”.  Journalism at its most prurient and intrusive finest.


…I preferred him when he was still an executive transvestite, and funny.


…you never go Full Luddite.


…Jesus wept.


…the only “sex toy” I’d want to use on this whiny moonbeam tart would be a bullwhip.


…fighting over sports teams is only slightly more ridiculous than fighting over shampoo brands.

Now onto the REAL [snigger]  news:


…don’t you just love the Third World?  Next thing, they’ll believe in Socialism.  And speaking of which:


…sorry, Nigel old chap, but I’ll start to believe it when you Brits privatize the NHS.


…sorry, but I had to exercise a little editorial discretion, there.


…and if you were dead, we wouldn’t have to endure bullshit like this, you smug Canucki socialist sow.  (For those with short memories, this foul creature was once governor of Michigan.  Yeah, I know:  Michigan voters have no clue.)

And just to improve the spirit, so to speak, here’s a Michigander who isn’t ugly:

   

If Dita isn’t good news, we’re all in trouble.

Monday Funnies

Funny Stuff

So instead of lyin’ about, let’s try to get the ol’ smileyface working:

And:

And now, a quiz.  What do all four of these ladies have in common?

A:  They’re all consuming things that are considered bad for your health.

You dirty-minded bastards.

News Roundup

Bad News

All the news that’s fit to moon:


…nice to see that the BritGov is finally “allowing” bonking à la carte.  Scotland, however, is not prepared to go that far:


…oh aye, leave that shagging stuff to the Sassenachs.


…and you were doing SO WELL up until now, sweetie.


…clearly, what we need is commonsense lightning control.  Or commonsense football control.


…nice to see that the disheveled BritPM has solved all the UK’s other problems, so he can devote his time to this one.


…not sure if that’s a step up or a step down, quite frankly.


…holy hell.  Talk about an over-achiever… and speaking of which, here’s superslut Madonna’s little girl:


…not a bad bum, actually.  And still on the topic thereof:


…to upstage that, the bridesmaids would pretty much have to go naked.

Moving from shapely buttocks to big assholes:


…errrr Mitt, old buddy;  I don’t think the GOPe had much of the lesbian vote anyway.  Ask that purple-haired soccer chick/bloke.

And speaking of INSIGNIFICA:

     
…and Keeley who, you ask?

 

Oh yeah, that Keeley Hazell.