Category: Crime

Wrong 10

Books & Movies, Crime

Yeah I know, it’s another piece of A.I. garbage, masquerading as thoughtful critique, but this take on the 10 greatest heist movies gets it wrong.

To save you the time of watching the video, with its fake voice and faker conviction, here’s its list:

10 – Oceans 11 (no argument;  the first and best of the Oceans franchise, and far better than the original Rat Pack version)
9 – The Italian Job (with Michael Caine;  also no argument)
8 – Inception (nope;  it’s not a heist movie, but sci-fi)
7 – Rififi (no argument)
6 – Inside Man (no argument)
5 – The Sting (nope, it’s not a heist movie;  it’s a sting, just as the title suggests)
4 – Reservoir Dogs (nope, it’s not a heist, just as the “narrator” suggests)
3 – Heat (no argument)
2 – The Town (haven’t seen it yet, so no comment)
1 – Goodfellas (nope;  it’s not  even remotely a heist movie)

You see, there’s a framing problem, here.  The definition of a “heist” movie is that it’s about criminals stealing stuff from an institution, not from people.  It has to be about the actual robbery, in other words, and not about the aftermath (Reservoir Dogs) or just an aside to the plot (Goodfellas), or about robbing an individual (The Sting, Inception).  That’s not to say that the above are not good movies — they’re all absolutely brilliant — but they’re not about heists, according to my definition.

So if we delete the unqualified, it leaves four spots open on the list.  Here are my modest suggestions for inclusion, in chronological order:

The Lavender Hill Mob (1951, Alec Guinness)
Charley Varrick (1973, Walter Matthau)
Thief (1981, James Caan)
The Score (2001, Robert De Niro, Ed Norton)
Heist (2001, Gene Hackman)
…and we could add either or both of the Thomas Crown Affair movies, with absolutely no argument from me.  Even Snatch could conceivably be included, as it begins with arguably the funniest robbery ever filmed.

To be frank, though, heist (or “caper”) movies are not my favorite genre, so there may be others that are worthy but that I haven’t seen, so feel free to add your own suggestions in Comments.

Afterthought:  I suspect that not many have seen Jules Dassin’s Rififi, but I would earnestly recommend that you do so.  When the entire spectacular heist is filmed without dialogue or music, you have to know… so that poxy A.I. list got at least one thing right.

Right Idea

Crime, Immigration

I see that the famously-tolerant Swedes are coming to their senses about this immigration business:

Sweden’s government on Tuesday said it would put forward a bill introducing a requirement for migrants to adhere to an ‘honest living’ or face deportation.

The country’s centre-right government, supported by the anti-immigration Sweden Democrats, came into power in 2022 and vowed to get tough on immigration.  They are now trying to rapidly push through a slew of reforms in various areas ahead of legislative elections in September.

The new requirement would make it easier to withdraw residence permits for migrants.

Speaking at a press conference, Migration Minister Johan Forssell told reporters: ‘Following laws and rules is a given, but it must also be a given that we do our best to live responsibly and not harm our country.  If, for example, you ignore paying your debts, if you don’t comply with decisions from Swedish authorities, if you cheat the benefits system, if you cheat your way to a Swedish residence permit… then you do not have the right to be here,’ Forssell said.

Other examples the government cited as examples included working without paying taxes or not paying fines.

That all sounds perfectly reasonable to me.  Immigrate (lawfully) by all means, but once you’re here, act like an actual citizen and not like some criminal scrote, or face getting tossed out.

Loath as I may be to suggest that we learn any policy from the Scandis, this would be an exemplary one for us to implement as well.  I don’t know the specifics of their policy, but it should be made that said repatriation and loss of residence status would include the entire family of the deportee, including any children born Over Here.

Yeah, Whatever

Anarchist thugs

Anytime a couple of anarchists blow themselves up, it’s a good day for the world:

The bodies of an anarchist couple were found beneath the rubble of a cottage on the outskirts of Rome after they blew themselves up while making a bomb.

Police believed Alessandro Mercogliano, 53, and 36-year-old Sara Ardizzone were plotting an attack against a police station and Leonardo, a defense contractor, which made parts for F-35 jets.

Traces of ammonium nitrate, a chemical used to make explosives, were found in the debris of the abandoned building beside an ancient Roman aqueduct on Friday.

Police said the pair were supporters of Alfredo Cospito, the jailed figurehead of a loosely-organized anarchist network called the Informal Anarchist Federation.

I must admit, though, I like the name:  “Informal Anarchist”.  I’m something of an “Informal Commie Killer”, myself — except I’m not going to actually do something like shoot a few Commies, oh no not me, no sirree.

Anyway, to return to the main point:

Changing Cards

Corporate Fuckery, Scam Artists

Last Monday morning I went out to run some errands — nothing fancy, just dropping off a document at the tax guy, paying for the sooper-seekrit mailbox, and a quick trip to Kroger for some top-up items.  Basically my spend was less than a hundred dollars, but I knew I had way more than that in the bank account, so no big deal, right?

Wrong.  I got home, check the email and there was a warning message from the bank saying I had less than $100 in my account (I am so glad I have this feature).  When I looked at the account, there was an ATM charge from some company for $336 dollars — a company I’d never heard of nor visited, and when I looked at the details, it noted that the transaction method was a “tap”.

Didn’t happen.

I then called the bank and told them about the fraudulent claim, which got the wheels turning.  Net result:  they changed the transaction to “pending”, but then the crap began:  policy is to issue a new card number/card, which takes ta-da!  up to five business days to process and deliver.  So basically, I end up without an ATM card for that period, plus I have to contact all the autopay vendors and give them the new card number so that my life can continue uninterrupted, without such things as wifi being disconnected and so on — you know the deal.

What disturbs me about all this is that apparently there’s no guarantee that a fraudulent transaction can be “clawed back” if it’s been made against a checking account — it’s considered your problem — but with a credit card, however, it’s the bank’s problem and they have all sorts of ways to get the money back.  Seems weird, but that’s banks for you.

I remember seeing one of those EeewwwChoob videos a while ago wherein some smart money guy said that he refused to use an ATM card, ever, and only used a credit card because of just such a situation.

Here’s my take:  I don’t owe a lot of money on my credit card, and thanks to an upcoming tax refund I could pay it all off without any problem.  (I normally pay 6x the “minimum” each month, so I don’t get stung too badly by their loanshark interest rates.)

I am thinking, now, that maybe I should do what the Smart Money Guy said, do away with the ATM card and treat the paid-off credit card like it’s an ATM card, and just pay the balance in full each month.  (I don’t spend a lot of money on the Visa card so this shouldn’t be a problem, and our income — from New Wife’s job and my SocSec gets automatically transferred out of our current accounts into an interest-bearing account anyway, so we never have that much cash in the current accounts.)  I have full faith in my and New Wife’s self-discipline to do this, by the way, so on that score there should be no problem.

My question for y’all:  if I do the above and pay off the credit card balance in full each month, is there a risk that Global MegaBank Inc. will realize that they’re making no money off their loansharking, only from their transaction fees, and cancel my credit card?

All input is welcome.

Quote Of The Day

Immigration, Muzzies, Psychos

Talking about this little adventure:

“We need a total immigration moratorium and a complete ban on all African, Islamic, and Third World migration to this country forever.“ — Christian Heiens

Amen to that.

And I don’t care about how !raycissss! this sounds.  What’s at stake is the future of our civilization and our national principles — and I’m not exaggerating, either.