Category: Bad News

And speaking of which:

...frankly, if you’re over 50 and still need to be taught about safe sex, you deserve to have your naughty bits rot.

More Health News:

…

And in Economics News:

...and in other news, Gen. G.A. Custer is having issues with the Sioux.

...unexpectedly.

In related Global Warming Climate Cooling Change© News:

...unexpectedly again, as pounding hailstorms have never been seen before in Texas. [eyecross]

Time for some Easter Festivities:

...as long as the crucifixees are Commies and Greens [some overlap]. we should import that custom to the U.S. immediately.  I have a list...

In Sex Wars:

...assuming, of course, that he can put up with all your vapidity, sophistry and childish behavior.

...and just a quick reminder of why:

Moving on to Train Smash News:

...can’t see the problem, as she’s inflicted her offensive music on us for all these years.

And from the cabin of Captain Obvious:

...two words:  three strikes.

Also:

...in which we play our popular “Guess The Race” game. Can’t guess?

…quelle surprise.

In matters of 

 

 

And in Entertainment News:

…and the world mourns.

And in Sporting News:

I know, I know:  “But when’s she going to show us her jugs?“ Read more

And why so many?  Try this little tidbit:

...just sayin’.

Some Election 2024 News:

...read the article to see the truth about “Form EL-131”.  Then feel the burn...

In Financial News:

...starve the fuckers.

And some International News:

...funny how Commie votes are always “unanimous”, isn’t it?

...let ’em eat bugs;  the government apparatchiks, I mean.

... [/Frank Zappa]

In ShowBiz News:

...if they want to add more fantasy to Bond movies, they’ll have to bring in dragons and elves.

And in Health News:

...especially goblins.

…

...and the ad copy writes itself:  “Better Woodies, Longer Life!”

From the anals [sic] of Wokedom:

...seems like it was consensual, so I can’t see the problem here. [j/k]

And from the front lines of Sex Wars:

...but of course, he’ll still be on the hook for child support.
#BelieveAllWomen

And in some 

And strolling down :

...”thrills”, hey?  Let’s have a look:

Yeah, I guess that’s kinda “thrilling” — and the end of the news.

And speaking of women needing Nervine:

...maybe with each other, but no man should.  And then there’s this:

...I don’t know if there’s enough Nervine left for this one — unless she’s the one who cornered the stuff.

Now for some Good Tidings:

And in Election News:

...keyword:  Russia — but coming soon to a polling place near you.

...I guess “We’re totally fucked” was judged to be too inappropriate a summary.

In Legal Notes:

...well, “Jesus” told me she needs a swift cunt punt, but I managed to control myself.

...proving that when it comes to the law nowadays, there’s no room for facts and sanity.

...let’s hear it for the Second Amendment.

In Millennial News:

...well, except that it’s not your fucking money — yet — so they can spend it on whatever they want… you selfish asshole.

In Sporting News:

...and that’s just for the Swedish Olympic team.

...not that anyone would notice, or care.

And when it comes to  

...you don’t say, Jen!  Here she was, back then: 

...and here’s what she looks like today, around 51:

Still quite toothsome with, I suspect, a teensy-weensy bit of  surgical help.

And that’s the news.

And speaking of that White bread stuff:

...actually, I’m cool with that, just as long as “Black people” then become ineligible to get any kind of government support, welfare, MediCare or Social Security.  Everyone’s always talking about “fairness” — well that’s fair:  don’t pay in, don’t get anything out.  (Also, define “Black”:  Black, half-Black, quarter-Black, octoroon… where do you draw the line, and how?)

In Election News:

...forget it, Jake;  it’s Carville.

...man, I bet ol’ Donald’s going to miss those dozens of Pence supporters in November.

...has anyone seen Sarah Hoyt’s Shocked Face lying around?

From the International News desk:

...nothing like a little UN and NGO “assistance”, is there?

...just another DEI initiative.  If they’re not gonna breed, they may as well fight.
#Equality

Time for an update on Global Warming Climate Cooling Change©:

...what happens when you buy into a hoax instead of looking at reality, where nobody wanted to rent the fucking things.

...and for those pissed-off French, German, Dutch, Spanish and Belgian farmers, this:

From the Dept. of Labor:

...which is all well and good.  But did Tyson not just admit to breaking the law?

In other Business News:

...you have to ask yourself who would be that poor that they have to shoplift from Dollar G.

Time for some Crazy-Assed Shit News:

...I bet she’ll never use that dating app again.  Also keyword:  Georgia, and not Florida.

...and here I thought she could only have got it by banging someone who worked at the place.

And in matters of 

 

...seems that she’d not want that part of her life publicized;  but here we are.  And of course, she used to be a TV journalist (a group not exactly renowned for their chastity)… but she looks kinda wholesome — about a 7-8 or so:

And if that’s the news, we’re done.