1. Young man says “Hey old lady, I’ve never been with a grey haired chick before, can you still get it wet?”

    Experienced GILF says “YUP” (proceeds to soak the young inexperienced punk with a tall glass of water).

  2. Young man says “I see my girlfriend is not home, but her grandmother is. I saw some porn movies that started like this…”

    GILF says “That’s only in the movies, in real life, here’s a cold shower!”

  3. Pro tip for young boys when talking to yer Southern grammy: Avoid saying the word “fuck”.

    1. Mr. Kim,

      Is it ok to use the F word with a GILF while you are banging her? Aka “Damn you are a fine F$$$, waaay better than young women. I F$$$$$$ love experience!”

      1. You CAN say that; just hold on for the rodeo ride that will follow.

        Don’t ask me how I know this.

  4. Listen you little fuck, your bologna, onion, mayonnaise sandwich is not made out of pig assholes, now you’re going to eat it and like it! Never again tell your grandma to ‘Eat a Bag of Dicks’ if you want to live long enough to see the sun come up tomorrow.

  5. Young man “Hey Uncle Jack, why are you dressed up like a woman?”

    Uncle Jack “It’s AUNT JANE NOW YOU LITTLE SHIT!” (Tranny proceeds to throw water in the young man’s face).

  6. During the Economic Lock-Down, Eleanor invested many hours of forcefully thrusting the remote-control at the television set to enthusiastically emphasize her disgust at all the insulting televisionprogramming… and we can see the magnificent results of her training-in-place!


    Investing her Lock-Down Year on the new exercise fad Remote-Control Training, Eleanor shows substantial gains in her upper-body strength… although, admittedly, she could benefit from switching hands more often!


    In this screenshot from the fiercely-contested ‘Seated Thrust’ competition, top-ranked Eleanor shows her fine form from the judges’ perspective!


    Despite her direct involvement in mounting evidence pointing to the contrary, Eleanor continued to dispute the Molecular Adhesion theory of the Thrust Dispersion hypotheses!


    And all the rest of that afternoon, Eleanor loudly complained her ‘cup was half-empty’!


    Encouraging her somewhat dim-witted ‘wing-man’ to ignite his nostrils, Eleanor then ‘played the hero’ by a ‘spontaneous’ yet well-photographed ‘save’!

  7. Suddenly realizing his winning cards were worth nothing to a sore loser such as Eleanor, the young fellow automatically joined the growing legions of Never Marry and MGTOW!


    While bicycling into the picnic-grounds, the young fellow noticed the bumper-sticker:
    * ‘Well-Behaved Females Rarely Make History’…
    and idly wondered if anybody could name one just one ‘well-behaved female’, at any time, in all of history, since the beginning of eternity, ever!

  8. “No, I’m not Mrs Robinson!”

    For the younger set:

    “no, I’m not Stiffler’s Mom”

  9. I like older women because they’ve gotten used to life’s disappointments. Which means they’re ready for me.

  10. Mikey should never have asked his Aunt Karen why no one ever wanted to marry her.

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