Oh FFS, here we go again:
Bosses at Warner Bros. are allegedly considering taking on a female actress to play the role of the iconic chocolatier, after two previous adaptations starred Johnny Depp and Gene Wilder.
Is any male role safe anymore? Dr. Who, James Bond’s “M”, Ghostbusters and countless other male roles have recently grown tits and vaginas — I mean, Jane Bond was even considered a while ago. (“I’d like a strawberry vodkapop… stirred, not shaken.”)
I really want some brave producer (I know, I know) to propose a movie project entitled “John Of Arc” : the story of a humble French shepherd boy who gets a message from God, becomes a fearless military leader and rallies an army to defeat an English occupation force. Then he’s captured and burned at the stake.
Nah, that’s just too far-fetched. Might as well just cast a chick for the role, to get the green light. Of course, the movie will bomb spectacularly and lose money — but who cares, as long as Teh Womynz get the gig?