“Dear Dr. Kim:
“I thought my girlfriend was joking about her wish to become a ‘crazy cat lady’ but now I’m not so sure she was joking. We’ve been together for three years and moved in together one year ago. At that point, she already had two cats, and we’d specifically looked for a place where pets would be allowed.
“Things started to get stressful when she brought home two additional cats without discussing it with me first. This was initially supposed to be a short-term foster situation, whereby she would nurse the felines back to health before finding them permanent owners. However, six months on and they’re still there.
“Having four cats in the house took ‘a lot of adjusting’, and I did try to tell my girlfriend how she really should have spoken with me about her decision first. However, she became defensive and didn’t appear to see my point.
“Around one month ago, my girlfriend brought home a fifth cat, again without asking me whether this would be okay. Now she plans to take in a sixth cat, and I feel I’ve reached my limit.
“What can I do?”
— Surrounded By Cats
Dear Pussywhipped:
You spineless piece of shit. This has got fuck-all to do with caring for animals. This is really about her controlling your life and not giving a shit about you, and you enabling this behavior.
So she wants to be a “crazy cat lady”? Grant her her wish, and get the fuck away from her — far away. Or you can stay until the cat collection grows to twenty, or thirty, all the while asking her, “O please my lady, may I have another?”
I don’t know, but I’ll bet your sex life is terrible, too.
Grow some balls, and find yourself some better pussy.
— Dr. Kim
