Category: Bad News

No sponsor wanted to support this Roundup, which given its content, is not all that surprising.  So here we go:

...so Captain Jack Sparrow won’t use a gun in any Pirates movie in future?  LOL

...I’m out of the loop on this stuff.  Does this actually mean anything?

...in tomorrow’s news, cakes, biscuits and chips may prevent cancer.

...hey, if Russia was my next-door neighbor, I’d probably do the same.

...and once again, no mention of flogging or impaling.

...Lynda Carter, Angelina Jolie, Sigourney Weaver and Halle Berry were unavailable for comment.

...and it would be just as enjoyable to flog you with a sjambok for an hour or two, you fucking sicko.

...wait wait wait, I’ve been wanting to say this for years… the defense: “Bitch had it coming.”

...suicide?  No?  Then I’m not interested, and nor are any of my Readers.

...quoi?  Shome mishtake, surely.

And more from the “Hey, It Could Happen!” Department:

  
…and:

…

Damn Spelchek.

From the bowels of INSIGNIFICA:

 
 
..fellow rappers Carpet and Adjacent could not be reached for comment.

Finally, not our regular Paige 3, but from one of the original sources:

 

And that’s it, till next week.

Sponsored by the makers of: 

And on we go:

...confirming what everyone (except the WHO) knew all along. Also:

…confirming what everyone (except Fauci) knew all along.  Ergo:

...

From our International News Desk:

...you had me at “French surrender”.

...their shithole country, their shitty rules.

...sounds more like a Frank Zappa album title. [/Weasels Ripped My Flesh]

And from the Dept. of Cultural Assimilation:

...no good deed goes unpunished;  nor does stupidity.  By the way, this now happens so often in Sweden that it’s no longer reported.

...report does not mention lynching, unfortunately.

...man, these pervos are getting kinda grabby, aren’t they?  Also:
 

And in the same vein:

…

...ya thank?

...which, by the way, you richly deserve.

And from the INSIGNIFICA files:

     

   

...you fuck strangers for money, on camera:  what’s to misconceive?   Anyway:

(By the way:  she’s a squirter, according to her bio.)

Worth $9 a month on OnlyFans?  I report, you decide.

And there ya go:  these are the times we live in.

So continuing in that proud tradition:

...stupid Spelchek.

...yeah, we all guessed that.  They either lie, mislead, exaggerate or conceal, 24/7.

...other reasons include: attending the Governor’s Barbecue, tradition, being a cowboy, and because fuck you.

...as most male Brit politicians are girlymen, this should not be surprising.

...yeah, how dare she interfere in her child’s education? [/teachers’ union]

...who is she, and why should you care?  Follow the link for the full story.

...on a per-insertion basis, that has to be some of the most expensive poontang in history.  Side thought:  how much does that crazy moron earn, anyway?

...the real mistake was when he tried to claim overtime for it.

And from the Dept. of Irony:

...as The Great Assimilation Experiment continues.

...no idea why, as “fuckup” does the job perfectly well.

...but no mention of flogging or castration, unfortunately.

...and who could blame them, other than the Education Establishment?

From between the sheets of INSIGNIFICA:

   

And following that last thought, something for my Lady Readers:

with link:
…no need to thank me, it’s all part of the service — although at $120, you have to need it really badly.

And finally, our Paige Three Special:

Okay, strictly speaking, the last one isn’t a “golf” outfit;  but I needed to make up a four.

Brought to you by:

And if that’s not enough to make you feel sick:

...and to think that all they brought with them were guns, a decent concept of government, and sound agricultural practices.

...that they know about.

...and I want a money bush to grow on my patio because that has better odds of becoming a reality.

...if you’re going to lie, why not go Full Goebbels?

...before I came here, I’d always thought that unlike Apartheid South Africa, America was all about NO racial categories.  Silly me.

...I wouldn’t even spend that kind of money on a chair if Gwyneth was part of the deal, gagged and tied to it.  Wait...

...hands up all those who are surprised by this headline… hmmm, nobody, huh?  And:

...not an actual bomb;  just a DVD of Disney’s Strange World (see above).

...from Ford:  where pronouns are seemingly more important than quality.

...don’t care, because I have more gin than .45 ACP in reserve.

From the Dept. Of Cultural Assimilation:

...just couldn’t wait to get stuck into that infidel poontang, could he?

...we need more of this.  Also scourgings.

And from INSIGNIFICA:

 

Finally:

Worth a hundred-odd bucks?  I report, you decide.