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Author: Kim du Toit
LOL
Funniest news item of the day:
“Migrant neighbourhoods in France have risen to the challenge of the Coronavirus crisis by rioting and looting supermarkets.”
“A shipment of [six million] face masks, ordered by Germany to protect health workers battling the ongoing coronavirus outbreak, has mysteriously vanished in Kenya. It remains unclear whether the batch was stolen or simply misplaced.”
I’ll take “stolen” for $400, Alex. Africa wins again.
“Dear Dr. Kim”
“Dear Dr. Kim.
“I’m so worried about getting the coronavirus. What can I do?”
— Paranoid, Chicago
Dear Para:
Do all the stuff that people have been telling you to do: wash your hands thoroughly and often, cover your mouth when you cough and sneeze, wear a face mask if you’re forced to be in close contact with other people, and don’t touch steel surfaces like handrails without cleaning your hands immediately afterwards.
Oh, and shoot all Chinese people on sight.
— Dr. Kim
Value
Suppose somebody said, “Here’s $1,500 and a list of shotguns — and you can only buy from the list,” I know what I’d do:
Buy two of these:
…rather than just one of these:
…and I suspect that 80% of my Readers would do exactly the same. (The other 20% would buy one of the 590A1s and a boatload of ammo with the change.)
A note to all the manufacturers of tacti-cool firearms: there’s a price point for most people when it comes to any gun, and just calling it “tactical” doesn’t warrant a 70% jump in price for very little added utility.
We may be Ignorant Clingers from Flyover Country, but that just means we’re familiar with the smell of bullshit.
I’m not a huge fan of shotguns for the above purpose — I belong to the AK-47 School Of Home Defense — but the one I would consider is the Mossberg 500 or 590 Mariner for under $600, because it’s weatherproof and pretty much unbreakable.
Quote Of The Day
“Our elite is full of self-important morons who contribute nothing but more dumb in a time when the only thing we have a surplus of is dumb. The real hero is the guy who trucks in a load of whole wheat bread, ribeyes, and low-priced cabernet to the Trader Joe’s, not the Prius-piloting sissy with a Maddow fetish who shops there. The people our elite laughed at, scoffed at, poked at, are the very people who are going to rescue us from the mess that same elite helped make. “
So true, and there’s even more goodness at the link.
News Roundup
Coronavirus coronavirus coronavirus coronavirus… doesn’t anyone have a juicy sex scandal to report anymore?
…oh dear god, if anything makes me want to catch the virus and die, it’s a nude Madonna pic.
…that would be Tylenol (acetaminophen) to us Murkins. Looks like that 300-tab bottle from Sam’s Club wasn’t such a bad idea after all.
…always the tough choices: beer or sanitizer. I know which one I’d choose.
…after all those Epstein memes, the Clinton gang gets creative.
…there being no ice floes in the Mediterranean to put the old people onto.
…EVERYBODY PANIC!!! You mean you don’t have a SHTF porno stash?
…okay, that made me LOL. Am I a bad person?
…Charles Darwin, call your office.