1. The Red Hat Lady Lawn Maintenance Service demonstrates its commitment to the fight against global warming.

  2. “Strapped for cash since the fall of their foundation, Hillary Clinton was seen Sunday morning mowing the lawn at her Chappaqua, NY, home.”

  3. When the battery died in Matilda’s wheelchair, she enlisted the self propelled mower to get her to Walmart for a new battery.

  4. A passerby saw me lounging on the porch with a beer, while my wife mowed the lawn in the hot, hot sun. This passerby was a mean old biddy. She shrieked at me, “make HER mow the lawn?! You ought to be HUNG!”

    I replied, “Why do you think she’s mowing the lawn?”

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