Stolen Vote!!!

I arrived at the polling station in a good mood, having established beforehand that yes, I was a registered voter and registered to vote in 3rd District TX withal.  Also, I found the address of the nearest polling station and off I went, all ready to cast my primary vote against that little crapweasel Rep. Van Taylor and for the righteous judge, Keith Self.

My good mood evaporated when I got my ballot paper.  There, at the top of the list were three names I’d never heard of before.  So I went back to the polling folks and said, “I think there’s something wrong — these aren’t the 3rd District Republican House candidates.”

“Oh,” came the reply, “you’ve been redistricted into the 4th District.”
“No I haven’t.  I checked on the official website just a couple hours ago, and according to them, I’m registered in the 3rd.”
“Ah,” came the airy reply, “I don’t think the website was updated in time.”

I didn’t do what I wanted to do because I’d left my guns in the car and anyway, I think it may be illegal to destroy those poxy voting machines with gunfire.

So I didn’t vote for any of the strangers, because I don’t know them.  I did, however, vote for the Usual Suspects — Jim Abbot, Ken Paxton and the other top Republican worms, and pretty much nobody else except the names I already knew from previous elections.  (I nearly voted for ex-LTC Allen West instead of Abbott in protest, but he can run again, and then I will.)

I was going to write to the Governor demanding heads on pikes, or worse, for the incompetent assholes who are supposed to do this stuff — aren’t computer systems wonderful? — but I had to allow my wrath to cool, because apparently it’s against the law to say some of the things I was going to say.

Anyway, all has ended well, because the little crapweasel has canceled his reelection campaign, no doubt because he was only going to lose the runoff to Judge Self as more and more voters realized what a little crapweasel he really is.  Strange that in an ultra-conservative district, voters aren’t going to take too kindly to his support of anti-Trumpers and shagging some houri  extramaritally.

Which means that a former LTC and -judge and staunch conservative is going to Washington on our behalf.  I mean their  behalf, because I’ve been shunted out of his district.  I have no idea what the 4th District is all about, and now I know how the Wandering Jew felt.

By the way, in learning about the candidates, I discovered that two of the Democrat nominees are an ex-Californian and ex-Bostonian respectively.  Fuck me, that didn’t take long.

And thankee muchly to the Loyal Readers who emailed me about Crapweasel’s withdrawal.



  1. It’s not the voting machines, it’s the people running the election. You know the Stalin quote but he stole it from Boss Tweed.

  2. I am from Massachusetts (aka Ass of Two Shits or also Taxachusetts)

    When people leave Massachusetts for freedom loving states there’s usually two reasons

    1 – best case scenario – they are freedom lovers who realize that states like Massachusetts, New Jersey, New York and the like are lost causes. These are good people looking to live the American dream. Freedom means everything. The constitution actually is respected by freedom lovers.

    2 – worst case scenario – they are parasites. They are being sent as plants to try to take over the good freedom loving states and spread their socialist communist bullshit.

    If it’s option 2 – do not ever vote these people into office. Slowly but surely more and more will work their way into the system and they will butt fuck the freedom loving states.

    Be careful. Many people are fleeing the communist states and have been throughout the CON-vid SCAM-demic. Some are good people. Some are absolute communist scum parasites. Looking to suck your freedom dry.

    1. Agreed. There should be something somewhere, memo, letter,
      notification, email, SOMETHING that should be easy to produce
      at the drop of a hat !
      Otherwise you are taking the ‘word’ of someone you probably don’t
      know, have never seen before and will probably never see again.
      Are they being truthful ? Beats me but based on recent history ……………..
      The answer(s) to your question(s) seem just a little to pat and convenient
      without ANY ‘backup’.
      Be careful if you ever ‘make an ‘issue’ of something in a ‘polling place’.
      Be calm but forceful, don’t raise your voice too much but MAKE SURE that EVERYONE in the place, within sight and earshot, hears you and sees you if possible so that they REMEMBER !!
      These people are NOT going to grow an integrity bone on their own. They
      are going to need some persuasion !

  3. Allen West did a great job for us when he was a Rep in Florida. We were sorry to see him go. He was kicked out of the Congressional Black Caucus when he showed up with Chick-fil-A when it was his turn to provide food.

    But I prefer to call him Col because he said screw the rules of engagement in the sandbox to save one of his men.

    1. West is worth voting for. Pissing off the race hustlers in Congress is a good enough reason to vote for him. The fact that he put the lives of his people before terrorists is yet another.


  4. Glad to hear that the RINO with the zipper problem dropped out. I’m surprised he had the integrity to drop out when he won the primary

    CoffeeMan is right about transplants. There are many people from behind enemy lines who are just fed up and leave the state because we know that there is little we can do to reverse the tide of imbeciles around here.


  5. As a political refugee from Kalifornia, I can only point out the MY California was the one Ronald Reagan would recognize. I do believe I’m doing my adopted state of Florida proud in moving the bar toward the Right.

    And I’m very glad to be out of that 5th World shithole.

      1. Thank you, Larry.

        The best thing I ever did was to leave the Grate State of Kalifornia.

        The second best thing was deciding to put down roots in Florida. Been here five years now, and loving it!

  6. As LTC West and LTC Self are retired military officers (and subject to recall), they both still hold their rank. Even though I retired from the Navy 10 years ago this month, I am reminded occasionally that I have not been struck from the rolls and can also be recalled to active duty. The Navy would need to find a pair uniform trousers with a 42″-waist, but I’d willingly go. My hat still fits anyway.
    CDR Topcat, USN, (Ret)

  7. “Vladimir Putin doesn’t want me to be President. He doesn’t want me to be our nominee. If you’re wondering why — it’s because I’m the only person in this field who’s ever gone toe-to-toe with him.”
    ~ Dementia Joe, 2/21/2020

    And you thought Trump tweeted stupid shit.

    Allen West would never have to pound his chest like that. Vlad’s sharp enough to know who he should & shouldn’t fuck with. Deep down, I suspect DJ knows he’s a pussy – that’s why all the hot air trying to convince himself he’s a badass.

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