1. Looks like it’s wearing skin tight leather garments – oh, that’s right, it is! Human leather!

  2. Wow. Sixty- five year old mother takes her four year old to the beach. The horror, the horror! (PS. Don’t you just love how she brought, and wore, her youthful scrunchy?

  3. Not necessarily a caption, but that’s about the color I shoot for when I’m smoking a turkey. Good heavens someone check this woman’s DNA for the cure to skin cancer.

  4. National Union of Glovers and Leatherworkers President Emeritus Blanche Dyes-Tannin won a gold medal for tanning her own hide and crafting it into a body stocking.

  5. As we see here, among the beach tribes of rural Israel, the ‘tasting’ greeting is quite popular. In addition to the cultural reinforcement effects, the lingering ‘fuzzy teeth’ sensation is a welcome diversion from their traditional diet rich in lamb stew.

  6. After his traditional ‘tasting’ greeting with an elder of his Israeli tribe, little Yacobi relishes the lingering ‘fuzzy teeth’ texturizing.

  7. Here, we see little Yacobi of the much-studied Israeli beach tribe readying for another taste sampling of one of the tribe’s “temple prostitutes”.

  8. Little Yacobi, an ‘up-n-coming’ contestant in the Most Tastings Before Lunch competition, enjoys some nice ‘fuzzy teeth’ after the awards presentations. And a grand time was had by all!

  9. After training from birth to protect The Vaulted Scrolls© == and with only moments remaining before TheOpposition® launches another of their impotent ‘attacks’ == little Yacobi of the ‘beach’ branch of the Israel tribes tastes the air to ascertain the potential for near-by detonations.

    Fortunately, his genetically-empowered tonsils aid him in his eternal task!

  10. Here, we are greeted by little Yacobi of the Israel beach tribes. Although many first-time viewers are ‘put off’ by the thought of explaining saliva deposits to the dry-cleaning staff after returning to their home countries, TheTribes™ assure ‘outsiders’:
    The Bleachings™ are an important part of The History® of These Most-Important Peoples©.

  11. Lounging gracefully on her section of the Israel beach, Mitzi welcomes little Yacobi with the traditional ‘tasting’ greeting of their tribes.

    As an ‘outsider’ once mentioned in an obscure Internet caption, the recent trend of Israel ‘tastings’ is likely an adoption, an ‘off-shoot’ if you will, of of visitors from other tribes, primarily those with a ‘papal’ bent.

  12. Here, we see ‘beach-boy’ little Yacobi offering his services as a saliva depositor to a wealthy Israel vacationer.

    Apparently, the saliva deposits accumulate, and after a certain number of years == or in this example, decades == protect the purchaser from harmful sand infestations in ‘private’ places.

  13. As we all know from our time at the beach, harmful salt deposits can accumulate to block vital sun-rays from reaching the skin.

    Fortunately, ‘beach-boys’ such as little Yacobi are available for a modest fee to ‘remove’ the salt, leaving the vacationer free to absorb all the sun-rays they can get. Another fine example of free enterprise!

  14. Hoping to earn an extra few shekels to feed his starving family, little Yacobi advertises his ‘availability’ with a quick demonstration to a lonely female vacationer.

  15. A few weeks prior to the dreaded ‘Israel pattern baldness’ malady rearing its ugly head, bushy-headed little Yacobi is popular with vacationers from the interior of the beach-front ‘nation’.

    And, as we all know from Internet warnings, it’s best to check for ‘fuzzy teeth’ prior to negotiations of an ‘intimate’ nature… because as the airport arrival posters proudly boast “What happens in Israel stays in Israel!”.

  16. Please! Tell me that is a bronze statue “beach art” item and not an actual live human?

    If not, definitely the poster grandma for the Cancer Doctors Association of America.

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