And speaking of getting the finger:
...bloody peasants. How dare you try to improve your standard of living?
…then gets shot dead by irate homeowner — oh wait, this is Los Angeles, nemmind.
...nor should he, except that he’s a Brit — which means that you have to allow burglars free rein on your property, even if they threaten your life. Kinda like L.A.
...go Huskers. Better late than never.
From the Dept. of Unforeseen Consequences:
...forget it, Jake; it’s Michigan.
In Showbiz News:
...witchcraft and sorcery inexplicably omitted from secret.
And related:
...so we’ve gone from this: ...to this:
Now is when we suck out the INSIGNIFICA:
...headline may include a typo. And no, I have no clue who she is, either.
And that’s all the news fit to (un)cover.