Category: Bad News

And today:

...with all the usual mil-spec quality controls one has come to expect from the MoD.

...so, our 2A rights are safe, then.

...and to think, they stopped working on that silly cancer cure thing, just for this.  I suspect government funding is behind this one.

...yeah, that “soft on crime approach” is working everywhere it’s tried.

...good fucking question.  Too bad it wasn’t Biden asking it.

...uh, I hate to break it to you, Blimpo, but I have more chance of winning New Hampshire than you do.

From the Dept. of Global Cooling Climate Warming Change©:

...as opposed to the date they predicted in 2001:  January 12, 2015.

From the Dept. of Health, two opinions:

...as written by “experts”, and the following appeared in the same newspaper on the very same day:

...and I’ll call next time I’m in town, I promise.

...call me when when a bunch of people die from this latest variant — because nobody has yet, despite all the fearmongering.

From the Wild Kingdom:

...like sharks need any help in that department.

...1. shoot it. 2. shoot it again. 3. shoot the owner.

In Economics News:

… ...don’t say he didn’t warn ya.

From the Heart of Stone Department:

...too bad it wasn’t on the return trip, but them’s the breaks.

...okay, how many of you have ever thought about doing this?

...yeah, me too.

And in RES INSIGNIFICA:

       

  ...and on a parallel train of thought:

 

And lest you think I never give you anything useful in these Roundups:

(link)

And in Media Events we’ve been expecting for a long time:

...nepotism at its finest.  Also:

...and good for them.  Lest we forget, Brand is being accused, but hasn’t been found guilty of any crime, let alone this bullshit.

...as long as it makes landfall at Washington D.C., I’m cool with it.

And in Global Cooling Climate Warming Change© News:

...or maybe that asteroid could hit Northern California instead?  All these choices...

Still on the falling Biden Economy:

...just take a number, assholes.

In Parish News:

...so much for his plan to become the next Pope.  Although...

From the Department of Litigation:

...sounds about right.  Of course, maybe he could have seen the non-bridge before driving off it — which will be the Google defense.

…

…

In link-free INSIGNIFICA:

...no comment.

...go on, you know you want to. Read more

Let’s get on with it:

...combining mythology, fantasy, superstition and bad grammar all in one headline. (And no, there’s no link… are you kidding?)

Speaking of superstition, here’s the latest from the Global Cooling Climate Warming Change© Dept.:

…

…okay:  I’m no fan of this foul broad but even I’m on her side here.  Considering that she was only blowing/shagging her hubby, I don’t see how this qualifies as “prostitution”. [#KillAllGovtLawyers]

...FFS, when she’s not incoherent, she’s moronic.

...and hundreds of DMV employees flock to volunteer for the jobs.

...soon to be followed by a massive increase in the murder rate as the scumbags no longer face the chop.  You heard it here first.

...keyword:  France.

...and to everyone’s amazement, her album shoots to #2 in the charts the week afterward.

From Captain Obvious, Inc:

...in another report, actual sex is apparently more enjoyable than phone sex.

...and the media are still bemused by the fact that most Americans hate, fear and distrust the Fibbies.

And in some truly magnificent INSIGNIFICA:

 

Finally, some Good News.

...the only way this show could get any better would be if Lisa Hogan (51) were to be filmed in the nude in each episode:

 

I mean, she is Irish, but that doesn’t seem to be a problem for Clarkson.

So on with the news… ugh.

...wait till they see 2023‘s numbers.

...next step?  I know: let’s press-gang some of those illegal immigrants!  What could possibly go wrong?

...I know, it’s terrible when 99% of a population gives all the rest a bad name.

In Crime News:

...”gun dealer” in Britishland being a worse sobriquet than “child molester”.

…

...given that the D.C. locals elected a bunch of “soft-on-crime” officials, one is almost tempted to cook up a bowl of popcorn.

...To Serve and Protect*
*unless we’re a bunch of fraidy-cats.  [/Uvalde cops]

...should have just offered some of the council members a kickback from the loot;  problem solved. [/South Africa]

...I dunno;  she’s kinda hot, so:  her own TV reality show, a multi-million dollar book deal, an OnlyFans account?  This is Biden’s America, after all.

...hmmm a vegan saying that narcissism is A Bad Thing?  How droll.

In Travel News:

...keywords:  Newark (NJ) en route to Dublin (IRE).  Like Manchester to Malaga, only with less class.

Time for a small helping of INSIGNIFICA:

 

 

Finally:

...my guess is that it’s not that often, but whatever.

And that’s the end of the bouncy-bouncy news.

Today is hereby proclaimed as SEX NEWS DAY (because I’m sick of all the other shit).

...key word: Romanian.

...there are Southern Baptist biker gangs in Britishland?  Who knew?

...only a cousin?  They should just move to Mississippi.

...when “horny bastard” is translated into New English — “untreated sex addict”, my aching nuts.

...keyword:  Virginia?  This should play well with the voters [/sarc];  unless her district includes Alexandria, in which case all bets are off.

...”sexual health doctor”?  Which medical school offers this speciality?

…

From the Dept. of Sex Education:

...not a bad idea;  it’s not like anyone is going to snitch on them, after all.

...judging by her pic, the “miracle” is that the kid could get it up in the first place.

...#Catholic Church

...wait till you see the pics.

...but she’s okay with having orgasms with other guys, for money?  I got nothing.

And in (link-free) SEX INSIGNIFICA:

  ...”granny grabber”, we got it.

...headline edited for clarity.

Must say, she’s a little light in the superstructure for me, but the legs are pretty good.

And into the carnage we dive:

...if by “trials”, Sarah means “mass hangings”, then I agree.

...using Commie money to bail out failed Commie regimes — sounds about right.  And right on cue:

...and speaking of failures:

…

...not included:  listening to anything that Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez says.

And in Global Warming Climate Cooling Change© news:

...of course, Africa collectively contributes nothing to the “problem” [/sarc], but that won’t stop them from hustling to get more money from Whitey.

...just another entry in the Climate Lies Journal.

And speaking of that thing:

...yet another example of “Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.”

...I dunno;  I would say that vodka is a more essential part of the “college experience” than 90% of professors, and just behind condoms.

...actually, for any nation’s crime.

...key word:  Canada.  (Okay, India.  Fooled you there for a minute though, huh?)

...whatever punishment she suggests, under the Equal Protection Clause it should be inflicted on 99% of women.

...one might say the same thing about having a conversation with women.

...nice to know that it’s not only Murkins and Brits who can be “asshole tourists”.

In today’s INSIGNIFICA:

       

...why anyone should be interested in this fat old tart’s sexual preferences is beyond me.

By the way, if you know what she looks like, you’ll have this reaction to a visual of her in “reverse cowgirl”:

Finally, a heartfelt “Welcome back!” to Paige Three News:

...share it with us, baby:

I think we can end the slaughter there.