Author: Kim du Toit

Health Warning

Health

Well, that sucks:

Men are more likely to fracture their penis at Christmas, doctors say.  German medics discovered rates of the eye-watering injury spike over the festive period.

Here’s the background:

Although the penis is not a bone, it can fracture when the appendage is subject to sharp, blunt force. Afterwards, the penis usually resembles an ‘aubergine’, turning purple and swollen.

Ah, so that’s what this emoji means…

…and this one means it’s crying, therefore broken?

Okay, never mind all that.  Here are the Three Major Reasons why you might break your dick over the Christmas period:

  • at the office Christmas party, you get too keen trying to shag that chick from Accounting in the upright position (you know,the one with humongous tatas), and slam into the wall by mistake
  • it’s the only time of year when the old lady relents and gives you a pity fuck, and you can’t remember how it works after so long a layoff [sic]
  • when you get your annual hand job (see above), instead of acting like a lady, she goes all Boston Strangler on your manhood.

Feel free to add your own ideas, in Comments.

News Roundup

Bad News


...aren’t we all, honey.


...we aren’t, unless you exclude inner-city Black neighborhood gangs;  but I fucking wish we were, then maybe we’d get a little respect.

Let’s continue with some Election News:


...more, much more in the Commie/Blue states.  And therefore:


…unfortunately, the “plan” involves giving more power to the states which, as the criminal states are all Blue, means nothing will be done.

Internationally:


...I guess even Labour’s not interested in securing the Tranny Vote in Brighton.

In the Let’s All Panic !!!!! Department:


...which means OMG it’s Lockdown Fascemask Time again!  Or not.

And in the Great Cultural Assimilation Experiment:


...can’t see why all the fuss;  after all, it’s probably legal to buy children in Tunisia.  And surprise, surprise:  he’d overstayed his visa.

Let’s not forget Global Warming Climate Cooling Change©:


...I didn’t even know they had bears in Japan.


...which, if you believe that La Swift is in fact the AntiChrist, makes all sorts of sense.

Related to the Glueball JewHate thing:


...as much as I support the Izzies, I can’t support this one — because having State pull this kind of trick is not a good precedent, because there’s no telling what they’d do during the next Republican administration.


...I guess that “laboratory of the states” thing is still popular, even though it fucks with the Constitution occasionally.

In Church News:


...key phrase:  Church Of England.  No wonder the imams are becoming more popular Over There.

In Sex News:


...goodbye OnlyFans, boo hoo.

Yes, it’s INSIGNIFICA time:


...no idea who she is, of course, but whatever:

Not what I’d call “busty”, but everyone sing along:

♫ ♪ ♫ ♪ “Oh, she gets by with a lotta help from her bra” ♫ ♪ ♫ ♪

But Refugees!

Muzzies, Two-Minute Hate

Here’s something I didn’t know, but which doesn’t surprise me:

From the murder of Sébastien Sellam in 2003 to that of Mireille Knoll in 2018, all murders of Jews in France have been committed by radicalized Muslims.

Yeah well, duh.  There are more such interesting snippets at the link, including this one, also duh:

74% of Muslims between the ages of 18 and 25 in France say they place Islamic sharia law above the laws of the French Republic.

I’m thinking it’s time for the mass deportations to begin, but no doubt someone will have a problem with this.

Thoughts On The Colorado Thing

Advice, Elections

As we all know, the Colorado courts have ordered Trump’s name removed from the Republican primary ballot of 2024 because he “encouraged insurrection” (yeah I know, he didn’t, there’s no proof, but that’s not gonna stop the Lefty craziness*).  You can’t even write his name in, because the court ordered those ballots to be counted as “spoiled” and discarded.

Of course, this idiocy is going to the Supreme Court, where it should be struck down (and the Colorado courts’ collective pee-pee as well, don’t get me started).

But it might not be, because if there’s one thing we’ve learned about the Supreme Court as currently constituted is that what seems blindingly apparent to anyone with a sentient brain, is often just a way for them to apply some tortured fucking legal logic to gainsay the obvious.

Whatever.

Here, however, is a way for the Stupid Party to do something not stupid.

Simply refuse to hold a primary in Colorado.  (They’re talking about doing the caucus thing — like Iowa does — but that’s not what I’m talking about here.)  Boycott the state completely.  Declare them “irrelevant”.

OR:  let all the Republican weenies who are desperately trying to achieve relevance in the election field refuse to have their names on the ballot as well.  Withdraw from the Colorado primary altogether.

Now of course that will never happen, because politicians are all greedy motherfuckers and all it takes is for one fat New Jersey politician to break the compact and the others would have to get back in.  One might suggest that breaking such a compact would be a clear indicator that the fat fuck isn’t fit to be POTUS, but Joe Biden seems to have made the “fit to hold the office” thing completely irrelevant.

Anyway, this may all be moot because SCOTUS might actually tell Colorado that what they’ve done is un-Constitutional, which it plainly is, but then see my statement above about the Biggest Lawyers’ reliability.

What a mess.

*We need remember only one Leftist quote to prove this statement:

“To send men to the firing squad, judicial proof is unnecessary. These procedures are an archaic bourgeois detail.” — Che Guevara

The Colorado court clearly thinks the same way.  Q.E.D.