If ever we needed more proof that Big Air (not Congress, that’s a rant for another time) are a bunch of chiseling bastards, here’s the latest:
American Airlines announced Tuesday that it plans to add seatback screens to its aircraft and to increase the number of premium and extra-legroom seating in some aircraft.
I don’t care about the screens because I seldom if ever use them unless it’s to follow the flight’s progress on that little map thingy.
I really care about the seat issue because lest we forget, some twenty or so years ago airlines began reducing seat sizes and cramming the smaller seats into ever-smaller spaces within the planes. Yeah, the feeling went in Big Air Finance, that’s fine, especially as that enabled them to buy smaller-and-yet-smaller aircraft without losing passenger count.
Now, of course, to ride in their cramped aluminum tubes you have to have the approximate body shape of Victoria Hervey to fit in the seats, coupled with the approximate height of Peter Dinklage to have any kind of legroom.
(photos not drawn to scale; Dinklage actually comes up
to just above Hervey’s navel)
Now, as customer discontent has grown to a fever pitch — most especially, of course by those poor souls (i.e. everyone who can’t afford the bloated fares of first- and business class) thus cramped into a fetal position for a lengthy flight — American is now installing “premium” seats with “extra legroom”. (The “premium” refers to the prices they’ll be charging, and the “extra” is how much more you’ll have to pay.)
How much extra? Here’s an example:
Note that the departure times are different — i.e. different flights — because the earlier flight had sold out of Premium Economy seats.
If the above doesn’t give you the Warm & Fuzzies, then you obviously aren’t an American Airlines accountant.
For the rest of us, however:
At this point, I need to warn y’all that at some time next year I have to fly to the Old Racist Republic — details unimportant, because personal — and I’ll be raffling off several guns to be able to afford the Economy fare (don’t even think about Premium, of course).
(Delta because I refuse to fly on any Muslim airline, fukkem)
Wheeee… eighteen hours in steerage: I can hardly wait.
Please set your budgets accordingly.