Disgusting Practice

Food & Drink

Here’s something guaranteed to stick in my craw, so to speak:

WHISKY is one of the world’s most popular spirits – but you might be making a big mistake when you drink it.

A boozy investigation into the beloved spirit revealed how to unlock the best flavor.

It’s all linked to the addition of water to whiskey, which is thought to “open up” its flavor – but don’t go past the 20% mark, because that can make whiskies taste the same.

Yeah, duh.  As any liquid approaches 99% water, it’s going to taste more like water.

I’m more upset with the concept of adding water to whisky.  It’s a disgusting habit, and best left to amateur drinkers.  (I know, I know, “unlocking the flavor”, like the taste in your mouth is somehow inadequate for the process.)

As any fule kno, the proper way to drink whisky (or even “whiskey”) is to drink it neat, with a glass of cold water on the side.

My only concession is — very occasionally — to add ice to the whisky (never to single malt, though) if I don’t want to get too quickly shitfaced.

Yeah, yeah, it’s all A Question Of Taste, and We’re All Different.

Allowing the addition of water to whisky is the thin end of the wedge, and leads eventually to filth like whisky & tonic and transgender acceptance.  You heard it here first.

18 comments

  1. I agree that drowning whisky with water or ice is something that can kill experiencing a good whisky/bourbon.

    I’m sure many have not learned how to enjoy a good dram, my own uncle being one, who told me that he learned to enjoy JW Black with a lot of ice in it when he was in the Air Force in the early 1970’s.

    I will say that I have personally enjoyed some high proof Single malt Scotch (a particular Tullibardine John Black’s Selection Vintage 1987 Bottled 06.2006 Stated Age 19 years) and bourbon (2004 and 2009 Buffalo Trace George T. Stagg) both neat, and with a smidgen of water added. Both wonderful experiences.

    As for this “study”, you had the proper response, “duh”.

    If someone really wants to learn how to enjoy whisky, I think that the Master Blender for The Dalmore, Richard Paterson, would be the best teacher.
    https://youtu.be/frRonhQdRdQ How to taste Whisky part 1
    https://youtu.be/UmE4kyg_Vbo How to taste Whisky part 2

  2. Let us not forget the greater sin, adding whiskey to Coke (or whatever flavored ick your dye-a-beetus craves). Very popular in the UK to have a scotch and Coke, or even worse up north, a Scotch and Irn Bru. It makes me throw up in my mouth a little just to think about it. FFS, that’s what vodka was invented for. As Kim alludes to above, you might as well drink Bud Light and get fitted for a tutu.

    I will admit there are some bourbons, especially some that run into the 115 proof+ category, that can be a little hot for me, so I will on rare occasion put a cold, wet spoon in the glass for a second or two, but even then I feel a little cheap.

  3. I was raised to believe that whisky, uisge beatha, was a holy sacrament to be revered. On my first visit to Edinburgh I eagerly hastened to the local to learn insider whisky knowledge from the local yokels. They were all ordering whisky and lemonade or occasionally with Coke.

  4. My parents and I were inveterate drunks, perhaps the result of being of Irish descent.

    So we generally did not like any impurities in our whiskey, in my case including water or ice or, frequently, even removing the bottle from the bag

    But my nightly passion for getting drunk every night , whether I needed to or not, led to my giving it all up as a fairly young man

  5. don’t people realize that very often the water is already added at the factory when they proof it down to 80 proof?

    I prefer higher proof bourbon neat. If it is below 100 proof then adding more water to it is just making a lightly flavored liquid even more lightly flavored. Single malts, neat. Most bourbon, neat. Irish whiskey is already light tasting enough. Japanese tends to mimic scotch to a certain extent. Blends, just drink it neat. Rye, neat get that spicy rye flavor or various degrees.

    Single malt scotch in a cocktail is like hanging a Monet in a room full of Jackson Pollock’s “endeavors.”

    JQ

        1. Yes, and you should be ashamed. On any other site, the proprietor would have banned you. But I’m a placid kinda guy…

  6. I was taught, and hence often have, put two drops of water into a glass of single malt to “open it up”. This, as JQ sort of implies, is probably myth.

    I do drink bourbon and cokes–or used to–but only with the bottom shelf stuff.

    1. Not myth. Taste it before, and taste it after 2-6 drops of water (and NO stirring.)

      How much it matters depends on how much oil-soluble flavors there are in it. A few DROPS of water will cause a reaction that separate out some of the oil and float it to the top. The next sip will give you more of that oil, and will change the flavor more or less depending on how much oil-carried flavors the whiskey has, which depends a lot on how it was aged and the barrels.

      More than a few drops, the reaction doesn’t happen, and you just get watered down whiskey. Stir it, and you reintegrate the oil, and you just have watered down whiskey.

      That said, the best whiskey is the whiskey you like the way you like to have it.

  7. I tried for a while in college to learn how to drink Scotch properly (neat). I failed. Life is too short to do things improperly so I don’t drink whiskey at all. Fortunately, there’s plenty of other ways that I can consume alcohol properly.

  8. Bourbon: neat. But if I’m smoking a cigar, the only acceptable accompaniment is a TALL scotch & soda with lots of ice.

    Carry on.

  9. I’m sorry to say it, but tasting whisky , *for the sake of tasting* rather than just getting schnockered, is indeed best accomplished with a couple of drops of water from a glass dropper—no more than three—but only after sampling the spirit neat. I used to think that adding water was just a horrible concept, until I actually tried it at a tasting event about 20 years ago. Now pass the Ardbeg, Glenmorangie Nectar D’Or, Aberlour A’bunadh, and 15 YO Springer if you’d be so kind.

    Note that if the whisky is cask strength, then it really does need to be taken down in ABV after the first sip, otherwise all you’ll taste is the alcohol burn, and that’s not pleasant, at least to me. Anything over 46% ABV is too strong without a bit of water.

    On the other hand, whiskey (with an e), is already awful since it’s either Irish or American and should simply be given either to guests with questionable palates or to perhaps clean one’s carburetor. Adding water to that swill is pointless.

    1. “On the other hand, whiskey (with an e), is already awful since it’s either Irish or American and should simply be given either to guests with questionable palates or to perhaps clean one’s carburetor. “

      I like you.

    2. you got it backwards. Bourbon beats most other whiskeys on a regular basis. And don’t forget, it was the Irish who taught the Scots the art of distilling

      JQ

  10. An aside:
    Who changed the term ‘trans-sexual’ to transgender?
    Who changed ‘cross-dresser’?
    Those people were freaks, but now, they are not?
    .
    Douse them in cheap blended, toss a highway fusee up their fake everything.
    No glass of water on the side…
    …”but somebody probably would have an issue with my suggestion”.

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