News Roundup

All the news that’s fit only for a one-liner response.

1) Iran puts $80-million bounty on Donald Trump;  George Lopez offers to have it done for $40 millionand for $20 million, I can get someone to take out George Lopez.  (See how that works?)

2) Ilhan Omar claims Trump will start war to protect his hotels’ incomeand for another $10 million, I can include this traitorous African bitch in the deal.  (Okay, I’ll stop this thread now or we’ll be here all day.)

3) Showbiz phonies upset at being mocked by a chubby Britand a nation yawns.  And speaking of phonies:

4) Prince Ginger and Duchess Slutwife quit the Royalty junketand the world (outside Britishland) yawns.

5) (South) Africa sinkssic semper Africani.  (Africa Wins Again, expressed in classical terms.)

6) CNN gets its pee-pee whacked for ruining an innocent kid’s lifeI hope the (confidential) settlement amount is a jillion bucks, not so much for spite but to make all the other media asshole organizations a little more circumspect in the future.

7) Girl wonder* AOC claims that everybody hates hernah;  she’s the most despised / mocked / ignored… maybe — but hated?  Not worth the effortNow, as for Hillary Bitch Clinton

8) Economy continues to growPaul Krugman hardest hit.  And now, a word from my doctor:

*”wonder” as in, “I wonder how anyone could be that ignorant and stupid?”


  1. ” Ukrainian Airliner crash due to structural failure. ” Catastrophic Structural failure resulting after fire melted Aluminum Air-frame when multiple hot metal shrapnel passed thru fuel cells igniting the contents.

    Secondary cause – Design flaw when aircraft failed to fly with just one wing, after failure of redundant backup wing.

    Bagdad Bob News Service

  2. Re: (South) Africa sinks
    An instructive example of how corruption works – everywhere. South Africa just happens to be both more newsworthy and too poor to be able to afford the sheer extent of it – but you can bet it goes on everywhere there is a power-elite to drive it.

    Africa is infested with natural parasites; I mean the animal kind. Unlike the human kind, they at least take care to not kill their hosts. Human kind of the African persuasion have not evolved to that level yet. This is possibly the only point on which other ethnicities may claim a higher level of evolution – that their form of corruption does not kill the host – at least not so quickly?

  3. ” Iran puts $80-million bounty on Donald Trump; George Lopez offers to have it done for $40 million — and for $20 million, I can get someone to take out George Lopez. (See how that works?)”

    And then Hillary has everyone involved whacked, just by making a few phone calls.

    1. Hillary says she’ll do it for $10M. The really need the money; looks like the Clintons are Dead Flat Broke again. I hear she took a job as a substitute teacher at some college in Ireland.

  4. 2) Tell me again how many hotels President Trump has in Iran.

    4) Prince Ginger and Duchess Slutwife quit the Royalty junket. See Also: John Lennon, Colin Kapernick.

    8) Plus someone hacked P. Krugman’s IP address and is downloading kiddie porn on it. He should have just borrowed Pete Townsend’s research library. (eyeroll)

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