Tag: Tools

More Knife Stories

Guy Stuff, Marxists, Resistance, Tools

Reader Blackwing1 had some good things to say about his Leatherman CS4 Juice:

…and I must say it looks good for an everyday carry (EDC) function;  but it does lack a whole bunch of SHTF gear, which was the premise of the original post.

Unfortunately, I just can’t get past the fact that Tim Leatherman voted for Fuckface Kerry, back in the day.  So I’m reluctant to buy any LM products — and yes I know, it’s ancient news, but there it is.  (According to him, he’s not anti-gun — “I own a rifle and a shotgun” — but the fact that he was prepared to vote for Anti-Gun Fuckface really sticks in my craw.)

I was once given a Leatherman tool as a Christmas present, and I passed it on to someone else as soon as the occasion arose.

Feel free to take issue with me.

That Knife Thing

Guy Stuff, Tools

Following on from my post about the Swiss Army Champ multi-tool knife, Reader John DJ sends the following:

For 27 years I took the President’s scrip to run about the globe and inflict bad outcomes on disapproved peoples, places, and things. During that time I learned to appreciate multi-purpose tools. I have used a bunch of different ones. Leatherman brand demolition tool, Victorinox Climber, Farmer, Electrician, gov’t issue demo knife and cap crimper (both complete crap but kept for nostalgia), and a host of large bladed knives (Gerber, Puma, Al Mar, too many to recall).

All that is to say that the Victorinox offerings have the most utility. I really like the Farmer model with saw and a couple blades. It is basic and good enough. The Leatherman tools are too heavy and unwieldy for what they offer. Better to slip good needle nose pliers in a bag or pocket along with a Victorinox and get on with business.

Below is my current favorite. It recently replaces a similar version loaned out but not returned. It is issued to Fallschirmjaeger youngsters, friends from my youthful days at Fortress Bragg. A good knife and a St Michael’s medal are mandatory kit for every competent paratrooper.

Did I mention that I really like Victorinox pocket knives with Alox handles?

I have to say that I like the look of the above sweetie, although it lacks just a few post-SHTF features that I’d like to have.  But as an all-day utility knife?  Sign me up.

And thanks for the letter.  All such are always welcome.

That One Thing

Guy Stuff, Tools

So you’re going to be marooned on a deserted island somewhere in the Pacific Ocean.  You can only take ONE thing with you.

What is it?  Easy-peasy.

Swiss Army Champ XXL:

Hahaha.  Just kidding.  There’s way too much stuff on the XXL that you’ll never need, and all that makes it damn heavy and cumbersome.

The “ordinary” Champ will do just fine.


(As I recall, I have about three of the things scattered around the place:  bedside drawer, toolbox and SHTF grab-‘n-go bag.  Oh wait, there’s another one in the kitchen “junk” drawer too, so:  four)

My only “improvement” would be to exchange the red plastic grips for grooved aluminum (which they make for the Mini-Champ and others, but inexplicably do not offer with the larger Champ models).

Feel free to argue with my choice in Comments.

By the way, this post was inspired by:

Plan Vs. Reality

Corporate Fuckery, Tools

Via Insty, I saw this little snippet over the past weekend:

BMW Patent Reveals Branded Screw Design That Limits Access to Vehicle Repairs

BMW has filed a patent for a new fastener design that underscores the automaker’s long-standing willingness to chart its own path, even when that path complicates ownership. The newly revealed screw head is shaped like BMW’s roundel, creating a proprietary design that standard tools cannot engage.

Unlike familiar Torx or hex fasteners, the patented screw uses a circular head divided into four quadrants. Two of those quadrants are recessed to accept a matching driver, while the remaining sections remain flush. The BMW logo is embossed around the perimeter, leaving little doubt about the fastener’s origin or intended exclusivity.

Uh-huh. While I like Glenn’s thought (everyone needs a damaged-screw extractor), that’s not how this will play out.

Here’s a preview of the timeline, as I see it:

  • BMW gets patent for new screw design approved
  • 24 hours later, you’ll be able to buy the following BMW screw-design screwdrivers at Amazon.com, all made in China:

Regular handle ($4.99)

T-handle ($7.99)

Cordless ($24.99, with charger included)

As usual, the marketing- and engineering assholes at BMW (a.k.a. the Control Freak Division) will be handed their asses by the market.

You saw it here first.

3 Questions That Shouldn’t Need Answering

3 Inexplicable Things, Guy Stuff

Every so often one will come across a question to which the answer is self-evident, but someone’s going to ask it anyway.  Here’s an example:

1. “When you find a rusted-out old kitchen knife, why not just toss it out and buy a shiny new one from Williams-Sonoma?”
— because nothing looks as fine as a well-restored blade, not just in appearance, but in its intrinsic history.  Need proof?  See here, where some guy with mad skillz goes after an old cleaver.

Here’s another one:

2. “Why would someone spend $170,000 on a replica of an old car?”
— because as long as the replica has been manufactured by engineers with all respect for quality as well as heritage, it’s worth it, and not the least because the originals require not just stupid money, but insanely-stupid money available only to Russian oligarchs, software company founders and parvenus like Jeff Bezos (also criminals, some overlap with the aforementioned).


(watch the second video at the link…)

Here’s another question of this ilk (but by no means the final one):

3. “Why is The Repair Shop such a popular TV show?  All they do is restore old junk.”
…it’s not “junk”, it’s heritage, history, treasured artifacts and sentimental objects.  To watch Steve Fletcher fixing an old clock, Will Kirk restoring an old piece of furniture or even those two old pink-haired biddies bringing wrecked toy dolls and teddy bears back to life is to see and feel the joy of a miniature triumph of life over death.  If you are not moved by that, you are a foul, crass and cynical human being.

The overall answer to all the above questions can be summed up in one word:

Craftsmanship.

It’s a rare talent (and becoming rarer still when so many people are seduced by cheap, fragile and nasty knock-offs from China or Eastern Europe), and if we hold on to no other custom, craftsmanship is worth everything. To quote Oscar Wilde’s words from Lady Windermere’s Fan :

Cecil Graham: What is a cynic?
Lord Darlington: A man who knows the price of everything, and the value of nothing.
Cecil Graham: And a sentimentalist, my dear Darlington, is a man who sees an absurd value in everything and doesn’t know the market price of any single thing.

I know I’m always teetering dangerously close to the latter, but all I can say is:  guilty as charged.  Especially where beauty and craftsmanship are involved.