Not The Optimal Choice

Today, I want to address the topic of:

Knife Sets

First, the dirty little secret:  not one of the brands which offer their cutlery in “sets” / blocks are very good, in that a “set” of knives tries to do everything well, and only partially succeeds.  Price is not an indicator of quality because inevitably, one (or more) of the components is not fit for function.

I have one of these, purchased before I knew better.

My summary:

  • the bread knife is terrible — it hacks the bread because the serration points are too sharp — and now I use a budget bread knife bought at the supermarket instead.  (The included paring knife is New Wife’s favorite kitchen implement:  we have two.)
  • the carving knives are quite good, but lose their edge rather quickly when you’re cutting things like cooked meat (ahem), so now I grudgingly use an electric carving knife for that purpose, and use the block’s carving knives only for cutting and trimming raw meat and veg.
  • the scissors are total shit — they fell apart (literally) after about six months.  I replaced them with a Kitchen-Aid pair (note the price), and they’re coming up for their sixth year of (ab)use, without complaint.
  • the block’s steak knives are also crappy:  they tear the meat rather than cut it.

Takeaway:  the Son&Heir worked in the kitchen at both Chili’s and Pappadeaux, and took note of what the pro chefs used there.  So when he finally moved into his own place (after sharing with buddies for years), he bought one sinfully-expensive carving knife — I mean, chef-quality — and uses two cheap paring knives (both Zyliss, see above), one serrated, one flat-edge.  He claims that those three take care of about 99% of his kitchen cutting needs.  (“What about the  remaining 1%?”  Dunno, he didn’t tell me;  knowing him, probably his Al Mar folder.)

The only reason to have a knife block at all is so that the knives’ edges aren’t damageded by clanging against each other in the drawer.

Frankly, if I were starting again, I’d get one of those wall-mounted magnetic numbers, and use it to store my own sinfully-expensive carving knife, a couple-three Zyliss utility knives and the Kitchen-Aid scissors.

For steak knives, I’d go with Victorinox because, duh Victorinox (see also:  Schmidt-Rubin rifles #Swiss quality).

Speaking of steak knives, I once had a set of Laguiolet knives, (bought in Paris and modeled, it’s said, on the Pyrenean shepherd’s knife), and they’re awful.

The blades are excellent, but the handles are too thin and they turn in the hand rather disconcertingly.  I think I gave them to Goodwill or something.

Frankly, I’d rather get a set of steak knives separately (as opposed to included with the cutlery set) and just store them in the box they come in, like this one:

Finally, I have a small cleaver for when I lose patience and just need to hack something apart (e.g. pork knuckle), and I have this one, which has a touch-up sharpener built into the sheath:

Five years of serious (ab)use, and counting…

I don’t have a butcher knife and don’t know much about them, but the Bearded Butcher guys use Victorinox, so there ya go.

Feel free, of course, to add your thoughts on this topic in Comments.

Looking Backside

Now that the 2023 Formula 1 season has ended, Max Verstappen has been crowned King Of All Drivers, etc., some questions still remain.

Asks Onetime Drummer Knob:

Simple answer:  Liberty fucking Media.

Long answer:  Liberty fucking Media, a bunch of woketard American businessmen who bought into the trope that grid girls were “exploiting” womyns and glorifying “unnaturally beautiful” women because of the race organizers’ consistent refusal to make grid girls “more representative” of womyns by adding Lizzo-style fatties to the mix.

Imagine introducing this:

…to this:

…and I think you’ll see where I’m going, here.

So Liberty fucking Media just banned the whole institution from F1, the wokist assholes.  Which worked everywhere except Monaco, where the race organizers told them to take a hike.

Expect to see Monaco dropped from the F1 circuit at some point soon.  Oh there’ll be Reasons, e.g. “the Monaco streets are too narrow to race the new F1 cars*”, but it’s going to happen.


*The streets aren’t too narrow;  it’s the cars that have got fat and bloated.

…like Lizzo vs. the old-style grid girls.

Repeat Performance?

Reader JD asks:  “Are you going to do your Favorite Things post every year from now on?  There was some really cool stuff there.”

Hell, no.

What I might do is post links to Favorites #1 and #2, and create addenda to said lists — just not as many, because I don’t see that much stuff that I like anyway, nowadays.  (The aforementioned lists were created from untold links collected, and also a few purchases made, over many years of Intarwebz drooling.)

Unsurprisingly, my tastes don’t change that much, so few if any of the things will fall out of favor or be replaced by some new flavor-of-the-month item.  (This may not apply to cars, because I fall in love with different models at different times as often as I fall in love with different redheads and/or old rifles.)  On most things, I’m fairly set in my ways;  yeah, I know, you’re all shocked — shocked! at that.

Another Reader asked why single malt Scotches were conspicuous by their absence from the lists.  I dunno;  maybe it’s because I’ve settled on an “everyday” single (Glen Morangie) and see little incentive to change that — unless someone in a bar / barman suggests something else to try, in which case, sure.  I might give some of the new Japanese whiskies a shot (or two), just as soon as I can afford them.

Sorry, I appear to have wandered off topic and into the wilderness here, but that’s often how it goes, these days.

My Favorite Things (Part 2)

Here’s the second part of the above topic (Part 1 here), this time of 50 excellent things costing less than $750.  Some of these might be decent / affordable Christmas presents…

51. LG CM4590 XBOOM Audio Set$250

52. Zassenhaus Manual Bread Slicer$220

53. L.L.Bean Snow Sneaker Boots$140

I’ve been wearing these since 1987, and I’m only on my third pair (purchased last month).  They are comfortable, last almost forever, are waterproof and astoundingly warm.  Best of all, they are much lighter than regular winter boots like Sorel.  If you live in a cold climate or are traveling to a cold country, I cannot recommend them highly enough.  (Pro tip:  use cheap Dr. Scholls inserts to make them even more comfortable and easier to pull on.)

54. Mont Blanc Meisterstück Classique Fountain Pen — $725

55. Saddleback Doctor’s Leather Duffle Bag$600

56. Naked Armor Straight Razor$120

57. Ruger Single-Six Convertible Revolver (.22LR/.22WMR) — $700

58. Marks & Spencer Linen Shirt$50
 
Every time I go Over There, I buy half a dozen of these, and they last until the next time I cross The Pond.  Best casual shirts in the world.

59. Steiner MM1050 Military-Marine 10×50 Binoculars$500

I’ve tried almost all of them — and these represent the best cost / performance / ruggedness option.  I never travel anywhere without mine.

60. Barton Leather 3-Watch Case$110

…which may not be sufficient for serious watch collectors (like Reader Weetabix), so there’s this one:

61. TAWBURY 24-Watch Case$220

62. Standard of London Antique Brass Desk Compass $70

63. Stainless Steel Water Pitcher with Ice Guard$35

64. Wheeler Space Saver Screwdriver Set $15

65. Scandal$20

The Christine Keeler story, and very close to the actual history.

66. Armored Steamer Trunk$250

Mine has wheels, but whatever.

67. The Last Detective Complete Collection$150

68. Caldwell DeadShot Front and Rear Bag Set $20

69. Jack Pyke Fleece Gilet$45

70. Braun Series 9 Pro 9465cc Electric Razor$300

71. Russell Hobbs TR9250WTR Retro Style Toaster$120

72. Thursday Boot Co. Captain Model$200

73. Chopin Nocturnes — Valentina Lisitsa $90

74. AeroPress Original Coffee Press$45

75. Foyle’s War: The Complete Saga$50

76. Springfield 1911 Mil-Spec$750

77. Barbour® Bede Wellington Boot$150

78. The Second World War (Hardcover) — $120

79. Roland CUBE 120XL Bass Amp — $600

No link because Roland stopped making it, the idiots [2,000-word rant deleted].  But it’s unquestionably the amp I would have carried around and used back in the 1970s, if they’d made it then.

80. Husky 18″ Wide Mouth Tool Bag$65

I actually use one of these as my range bag;  stronger, more accessible and doesn’t advertise that it’s a gun bag.  Also much cheaper than most of same from one of the “operator” brands like 5.11.

81. Marks & Spencer 10pk Pure Cotton Cool & Fresh™ Trunks$68
 
I buy these every five years, two packs at a time, and I wear them exclusively.  I’ve tried other “premium” brand undies from time to time, and they’re lousy, all of them.  Life is too short to be uncomfortable.  And yeah, only in black.  Because life is also too short to waste time deciding on the color of an undergarment.

82. The Colony Hotel, Miami Beach$120/night

Art Deco decadence, found in the right place for it.

83. Straw Fedora Beach Hat$35

I’m on my third or fourth one of these, since about 2004.

84. Estwing E15S Leather-Gripped Hammer$60

85. Pelikan Classic 200 Fountain Pen$200

86. S&W 686-6 PLUS .357 MAG$750

87. LP-099 Multi-Region PAL/NTSC HD CD/DVD Player$30

…backup for when you-know-who starts “offlining” your online streaming purchases.

88. Panasonic Lumix ZS100 / TZ100$600

This is the camera I’ll get when my Olympus and Nikon finally bite the dust — or maybe even before then.  (It’s called the ZS in Murka, and TZ in furrin countries.)

89.  J.S. Bach: Goldberg Variationen$20

Okay, if not Barenboim is not to your taste, then Klára Würtz is wonderful, as always.)

90. Waterman Expert Ballpoint Pen$80

91. Stag Arms AR-15 Left Hand Upper Receiver$600

…for the kack-handers amongst  us.

92. Wire in the Blood: The Complete Series$40

Scariest and most intellectual detective series I’ve ever watched, and Robson Green is excellent beyond words.

93. DOVO 5/8 Bergischer Lowe Buffalo Horn Razor Set — $500

94. Ariat Heritage Round Toe Boot$200

95. Fender Acoustic 100 Amp$450

96. Minnetonka Moosehide Classic Moccasins$100

Most comfortable shoes I’ve ever worn;  been wearing them nonstop since 1996, and replace them every other year or so.  If I could only wear one kind of shoe for the rest of my life, it would be these.  (In winter, #53 Snow Sneakers as above.)

97. Buffalo Jackson Roosevelt Leather Pilot Bag$350

98. Barbour Classic Beaufort Jacket$450

As with so many things on this list:  buy it once, buy it for life.

99. GALC No.2 Shave Kit$350

Last, but most certainly not least:

100. Citizen Steely Dan (box set) — $60

Nothing like ’em, before or since.

That was fun.  And Oprah?  Eat my nuts.

Change Of Season, Change Of Mood

We’ve had our first cool days here in north Texas — not the cold snap of a week ago, but that gentle cool of autumn.  So I had to change the wallpaper on Ye Olde Laptoppe, from this:

…to this:

Unlike the earlier pic, I know where this one is (because I took the pic myself;  open in new tab or window to embiggen, feel free to copy).

It’s just outside Belfast, Maine, looking out over the Passagassawakeag River (yeah, I know;  stupid Indian name, they could have just called it the “Belfast River”, but noooo).

I wish we had mist here in the Dallas area… or decent rivers, for that matter.

My Favorite Things (Part 1)

Well hell, if Oprah Winfrey can do it, then by golly so can I.  Okay, a little background:

Every year, the media mogul, 69, shares an expansive gift guide filled with a range of products like kitchen appliances and cooking supplies, furniture and home goods, clothes and accessories, and skin, hair, and makeup items.

And 2023’s is no different. With 109 items in total, this year’s list has ideas for fashion lovers, at-home chefs, food connoisseurs, beauty gurus, and workout fanatics. 

As expected, her list is full of useless shit like face creams and bubble baths:  not the kind of thing on a Real Man’s list unless he’s buying stuff for his wife / mistress / both.

So without further ado, here is Kim’s Favorite Things List (Part 1 — Part 2 next Saturday) with something for everyone.  Oprah did 109 items;  I will only do 100 because unlike Oprah (who had staff to do all the work), I had to do it all by myself.

Aside:  I’m also 69, so there we have it:  battling lists from two Olde Pharttes.

Oh, and one last thing:  all the items below give me a warm & fuzzy feeling when I look at them:  it’s a “favorite things” list and no more.  (Unless you’re very wealthy, it’s not much good as a Christmas list either — unless of course you’re wealthy and want to indulge yourself.)

Buckle down:  this may take a while, but hey, it’s Saturday:  what else are you gonna do?  Let’s kick off with the spendy stuff (all prices are approximate), and there is no order of preference or cost.  It’s all good.

1. 2002 BMW Z8 (4.9-liter V8) — $212,000

Anyone can have a silly Ferrari, Aston Martin or whatever that breaks all the time, for even stupider money.  But there are only a couple thousand of these Beemers left in the world. (And yes, the hard top is removable.)

2. Mauser M98 Standard Diplomat (in your favorite caliber; mine would be 9.3x62mm)   $14,700


…with manly iron sights, of course.  The optional companion piece:

3. Kahles K 3.5-18x50mm scope $3,300
…or, if you’re going to be using your M98 for close-up dangerous game: 


4. Kahles K16i 1-6×24 3GR Reticle $2,200

5. Annual Range Membership (your choice) $600-$25,000
(This is Texas Defensive Shooting Academy — TDSA — but whichever is closest to you.  Dallas Gun Club, FYI, costs $25,000 per annum last time I looked, and there’s a two-year waiting list.)

6. African Hunting Safari (flight, luxury lodge accommodation only;  add $10,000 for several small-game license fees, up to $35,000 for lion, buffalo etc.) $15,000 per person

7. Handmade shoes from Ludwig Reiter (Vienna) $660-$1,200
 
Buy once, wear for life.

8. Matched pair of shotguns (links in pics) $40,000-$$tupid
 
…for those of the “Over and Under” persuasion.  But for the more civilized amongst us:

9.  Classic watch (e.g. this Omega Genève from the 1970s) ~$2,000-$5,000

  You may have to search around, but the search is part of the fun.

10.  Sickafus Montana  Shearling Coat $1,700

Unless you live in the tropics.

11. Martin D-35 Standard Dreadnought Acoustic Guitar $3,500

Possibly the best-sounding off-the-shelf acoustic ever made.

12. Saddleback Hardside Suitcase $1,000

13. Zeiss Victory RF 10×54 Rangefinding Binoculars $4,000

14. Browning Buck Mark Medallion Rosewood .22 LR Pistol$600

Add the Vortex red-dot scope, for $300

15. Mini-Moke Classic Electric$30,000
Yeah I know, it’s a damn Duracell car;  but I’d make an exception for this one.

16. Rhino Ironworks Gun Safe$6,000

Ugly as hell;  but how cool is it…?

17. Chiappa Firearms Kodiak (.45-70 Govt) — $1,750

18. Leathercraft Conner Recliner$5,000

19. Winnebago Solis Pocket Camper$150,000


Don’t need much more than that, really.  We are not rock stars.

20. Canon EOS R6 Mark II$2,500

21. London’s Lights (Leonid Afremov, 60″x40″)$900

22. Longines Avigation$2,700

23. DW Collector’s Series Purpleheart Drum Kit$9,000

…add over a grand when you add the cymbals, stands, bass drum pedal and stool.  All worth it.

24. Hacker-Craft Destroyer — $375,000

I’m not even a Boat Person, and I love the look of this thing.

25. Karl Hauptmann Double Rifle (.375 H&H Mag)$40,000

26. Angora Executive Desk$25,000

 27. 1972 BMW 1602 (1600 cc 4-Cyl. 4-Spd manual) — $20,000

Before Beemers got really fuuuugly.

28. Nord Stage 3 88-Key Keyboard$5,500

29. Beretta Mod 74 Target (.22 LR) — $850

30. Orient-Express: Paris to Istanbul$20,000 (per person)

That’s the cost of the Grand Suite;  smaller cabins are (not much) less.

31. 1997 Land Rover Defender 110$66,000

32. Mesa/Boogie Fillmore 50-watt Tube Combo Amp$2,700

33. Seychelles Vacation (Four Seasons Mahé) — $15,000/week

Excludes flights.

34. Five-Rifle Set$1,200

Every so often, J&G puts one of these deals together and at the price, they’re an utter bargain.

35. Breitling Transocean Day & Date$3,500

…or you can drop an extra $5,000 and get it in gold.

36. Mont Blanc Meisterstück Around the World in 80 Days LeGrand Fountain Pen — $1,000

37. CZ 457 Varmint MTR .22 LR$850

Same hole, all day long.  And for its glass:

38. Trijicon Huron 2.5-10×40 30mm BDC$700

39. Fazioli F308 Concert Grand Piano$290,000

To my ears, the best-sounding grand piano of them all.

40. Viking River Cruise:  Amsterdam – Vienna$7,500 (per person)

41. Fender Precision Fretless Bass — $2,500

My #2 choice for a bass guitar.

42. Wiesmann MF4 Roadster / GT — $150,000

…if you can find one, that is.

43. FN 49 Luxembourg Contract (.30-06) — $2,100

Shoots smoother than a Garand.  Still regret losing mine in the Brazos.

44. Stetson El Amo Premium 500x$1,100

45. Driven Pheasant Shoot (UK) — $1,200/day

Assumes a 20-bird tally per shooter. Ammo, food, booze etc. not included
.

46. Colt Single Action Army 3rd Gen. (.45 Colt) — $5,000

47. Roland JC-120 Jazz Chorus Stereo Amp$1,250

… unchanged since the 1970s, it’s one of the longest-lasting and most popular guitar amps ever, and deservedly so.  As is the next one:

48. Fender ’68 Custom Twin Reverb Amp$1,800

One of the cleanest-sounding guitar amps of all time.  Except when you don’t want it to be, and then it gets dirtier than Miley Cyrus on a Saturday night pub crawl.

49. Longshore Tides Dolores Bar Cabinet$4,500

50. 1975 Rickenbacker 4001S — priceless

Why is it priceless?  Because that’s mine, is why.

Next week, the “budget” 50 favorite things.