I thought I’d just give y’all an update on the new laptop, which came preloaded with all sorts of shit from Microsquish that I neither wanted nor needed, and most of which has been banished to That Great Trash Dump In The Ether.
Sadly, one of the preloads was Windoze 11, which is a pestilence on the face of the Earth and whose creators deserve to be flayed alive and dunked in boiling oil. Fucking hell, talk about “counterintuitive operations”. It’s like learning a whole new program, and the easy functionality of #10 (which took me almost no time to learn lo those 8 years ago) has turned into a nightmare of different buttons to push and strange, inscrutable ways to see what’s actually on my system.
And WTF is “OneDrive”? If I wanted to store stuff on the Cloud or whatever it’s called, I’m perfectly capable of doing so by myself and by my own choice, thank you, instead of having it forced upon me. Needless to say, it’s been uninstalled (I think) but every so often I get to see yet another of its multitude of folders, which needs deleting each and every time.
Thankfully, the meme- and smutty pics files (i.e. the important stuff) are intact, which is more than I can say for my bookmarks, may the developers of Firefox join those of #11 in the boiling-oil cauldron. (I followed the “Save All Bookmarks” routine — as explained in Mozilla’s [no-]HELP section — to the letter, and yet only a few bookmarks made it over to this machine. Which means I have to re-create a shit ton of them by hand. Don’t get me started.)
Then there are the MS programs which I use constantly, like Paint and the snipping tool, which have changed for no good reason I can ascertain (and not for the better, let me tell you). I also like to have my Active / Open Programs tool bar running vertically on the right hand side of the screen rather than strung along the bottom of the screen, but apparently #11 doesn’t have that facility, FFS. Why is this important? Because my nice new wide screen has room to house said RHS toolbar, which would leave more visible vertical space to hold text articles; but as it can’t, I find myself having to scroll up and down more often. Fortunately, I could afford to buy a brand new Logitech ERGO mouse so that, at least, is less onerous a task.
On the other hand, it’s rather nice to have an “o” key which responds to a light finger touch, and the battery which lasts 6 hours instead of 30 minutes. And yes, at last I could permanently disable the horrible touchpad (unlike on the old HP laptop), and I no longer have to duct-tape the power cord to the system to keep it from falling out like some post-coital limp penis. And I can actually close the screen without all those dreadful creaking and snapping noises from the chassis and hinges. And the keys are backlit so I don’t have to have the light on whilst I type.
All good stuff, that last paragraph. Although I do miss having a DVD player in my laptop… but I have a spare multi-format DVD player which I can hook up to the system when New Wife is watching Great British Bake-Off and I feel like (re-)watching Casablanca or Foyle’s War instead of plucking my eyeballs out.
Anyway, the migration process continues apace, and should be more or less completed in a week or so. Next up: installing Thunderbird for my email. This should be fun…
There are (a very few) times when I enjoy using new technology. This, however, is not one of those times. It’s like having to buy a new car because the old one conked out, only to find that the pedals have been switched around and the steering is now performed by some new-style gaming controller instead of the familiar old steering wheel. I know that in time one gets accustomed to the New Way Of Doing Things, but why the fucking fucking fucking hell should I when the Old Way worked perfectly, for nearly a decade withal?
I’m just hoping that this is the last laptop I’ll ever have to buy before I Shuffle Off This Mortal Coil; but then again, I thought that about the last laptop I bought, and look how that turned out.
Rude good health, it seems, does have its drawbacks sometimes.
