Splendid Isolation

News Update

March 10, 2023 Kim du Toit Bad News

Brought to you by:

And speaking of getting the runs:

...fuckers need to be invaded again, just to set them straight. Powdered beer… JHC.

…that’s Detroit MI, with its long, rich heritage of brewing.

...okay, I pick “hell”. Your move, Brandon.

...leaving only 6 million or so illegal voter registrations to go.

...in accountants’ terms, he “lost” money even though he ended up with $120 million or something over what he originally paid for it. Not that any of it matters, cos he’s dead.

From the Dept. Of Irony:

...despite (or maybe because of) naming him “Cuddles”.

From the Dept. Of “Defense”:

...if I were a donor, I’d also hold off till they rename it the “Robert E. Lee Military Institute”.

And news from the SPCA:

...can you spell “irrational panic”, children? And:

...reaction from all cat-loving losers in 3…2…1...

Now it’s INSIGNIFICA TIME:

And finally:

...nothing “weird” about that at all, IMO. Especially when you see them:

Not really my cup(s) of tea, but that’s the news for ya.

Back when I was a starving musician and living more or less in the back of a van down by the river (some exaggeration, but not much), I couldn’t afford much in the way of food — “starving”, duh — and so I found myself eating an old boarding-school staple, a South African cereal named ProNutro. Here’s the scoop on it, in addition to what you can read at the link.

It looks like sawdust, and tastes pretty much like slightly sweetened sawdust. However, its nutritional value is extraordinary: one bowl per day, and you will not starve. In fact, if you have a large bowl for breakfast on a normal day, you may find come dinnertime that you’re not very hungry and could possibly skip dinner altogether.

It’s best eaten cold, with either milk or half-and-half (the latter makes delicious porridge of it), with a little sugar to taste. However: if times are really tough, you can use water instead of milk. It doesn’t taste that great, of course, but it will keep body and soul together. (I once lived on ProNutro made thus for just over a month, stealing sugar sachets from restaurants.)

It is highly absorbent, and even when you think you’ve used enough milk / water, you’ll still have to add more before you’re done.

I’m actually eating a bowl of ProNutro as I write this, which is what prompted the post in the first place. Try it: you’ll either like it or hate it; but there’s no denying that it works as survival food. Ask me how I know — oh wait, I already told you that.

Note: I don’t get any ~~bribes~~ income from any product I recommend on this site.

Caption Competition #271

March 10, 2023 Kim du Toit Captions, Friday Feature

Your suggestions in Comments.

How About Just MYOFB?

March 9, 2023 Kim du Toit Men & Women

Is there no end to this bullshit?

How often should you really be masturbating? Experts give weekly target for men AND women

I think the word “should” is the first word that makes my nose start to twitch, while “weekly target” follows close behind.

Of course, the answer is: “As much or as little as you feel like”, but the real answer is “Just mind your own fucking business, all of you”.

Just in case you’re behind your weekly quota [sic], however, here’s a little assistance:

No need to thank me; it’s all part of the service.

Color Palette

March 9, 2023 Kim du Toit Drive Time

This article got my attention:

Why is grey the most popular car colour for the fifth year running? How subtler shades have dominated the market for a decade — and the reason brighter tones have fallen out of favour.

The reason, as any fule kno, is simple:

Consumers are concerned about a bright colour ‘driving down the resale value of their car’.

Which is fine, I guess. Certainly, if I were buying another car today, I might not accept that ghastly bronze-y color of a decade back — even if the thing was really cheap because of it.

The problem, of course, is that car colors can date a car, e.g.

Haven’t seen too many modern cars looking like that, have you? (I’m talking about the color, of course — although that applies to its styling too.)

And let’s be honest: as much as they are the boring same-ol’-same ol’, black, gray, white and silver cars do carry over the years (and even decades), whereas brown, bronze, “champagne” and so on do not.

The latest color craze I see nowadays is that ghastly “putty”- or “cement” gray:

Ugh. And the trend towards matte finishes should be halted by legislation.

Interestingly enough, there are non-bland colors that stay popular: red, yellow, dark blue and dark green (a.k.a. “British Racing Green”), but that really depends on the car, of course, e.g.

…but even I might draw the line at a purple Dino, especially if I had another choice:

Ah-ha! white and silver, just like the article suggests. But even for a Dino, I’d never take one of these:

…because, you see, I live in Texas — where the last thing you want is a black car which turns your car into an oven (against which the Dino’s puny lil’ Italian a/c unit stands no chance).

That’s not a problem they have in Britishland, of course.