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Losing Character

Architecture, Two-Minute Hate

I’ve ranted so often about shitty architecture on these pages that one might be forgiven for thinking that I’d be sick of it by now.

Silly rabbit.

Here’s the latest example of foulness:

Residents living next to one of the most expensive houses in Britain have blasted the home as a ‘monstrosity’.
The newbuild, in the exclusive London suburb of Chelsea, has been nicknamed ‘Gucci House’ by appalled neighbours because of its ‘gaudy’ appearance.
The ‘ugly’ mansion occupies land that was formerly a school playground and has a dark grey exterior and imposing metal gates outside.

The exclusive street is the oldest in Chelsea, dating back to at least 1566.

I know, it looks like a wart on a pretty girl’s face — not, mind you, that London residential architecture is anything like a pretty girl’s face:  it’s dated, and occasionally quite horrible — but whatever, it’s what gives London its character.

As to why some rich fuck and his equally-fucky architect would want to lessen or destroy that character, I leave it to you to decide.  But speaking of that architect, here’s a quote which describes the process perfectly:

Original architects, Gumuchdjian, describe the property as surrounding a garden courtyard with an entrance that echoes the Parisian Hotel Particular.

Okay, let’s just nip this little turd-piece in the bud.

There’s no such thing as the Parisian Hotel Particular — it’s not a specific building, so it shouldn’t be capitalized.  The hotel particulier  is a style of building, and denotes a grand townhouse.  Here’s a typical example of said style, in Paris:

To even suggest that this London carbuncle resembles the above is mendacity in the Clinton Class.

And here’s the final word on this catastrophe, from a neighbor:

‘My house has survived The Blitz, it was built in the 1780s, they’re not building to match the heritage of the area. It’s like vandalism. How can the council approve this when it doesn’t match the other ones?’

Here’s a clue:

The house changed hands just last year and according to data from the Land Registry, the price tag of £73.2million was 209 times the average house price last year which was £350,396.

When a house costs about $100 million, a hundred thou or so to the right councilor or planning authority is small change.

Just sayin’.

The Idiot Twist

The Gun Thing

How many times have you seen someone closing a revolver’s cylinder by giving a quick twist of the wrist, making the cylinder snap closed into the frame?  It’s mostly done in movies, of course, as so many shooty bad habits occur, but I’ve actually seen it done at various ranges, shaking my head at the idiocy.

Here’s a quick video which explains why this action is stupid, and how it can damage the gun (often terminally, when repeated often).

A couple weeks ago I went shooting with a Reader at my local killing-practice facility, and one of the guns I brought along was my bedside gun, the S&W Model 65:

Now the thing about a bedside gun, as any fule kno, is that it absolutely, positively, has to work all the time with 100% reliability.  You pull the trigger, it has to go BANG and when you pop the cylinder release to reload (assuming such an action is necessary), it has to open so you can dump the empties… right?

Well, on this particular occasion the first part went as advertised, all six rounds going BANG.  The second part?  Nu-uh:  the cylinder was stuck shut, and required a firm smack to get it to move.  Not good.  But I went ahead and reloaded it anyway, fired off the rounds, and popped the cylinder open — this time, without any problem.

I would have shrugged the earlier malfunction off, except for that irritating “100%” reliability thing.  So I dumped the empties, closed the gun up unloaded — and the cylinder stuck closed again when I tried to open it.

Oh-oh.

Back at home, I checked the 65 out.  Pawl bent?  No.  Ejector hangup on the frame?  No.  Powder buildup at the forcing cone?  Dirty, to be sure, but after I polished it clean, the cylinder still wouldn’t open every time.

If there’s one thing I hate more than a malfunction, it’s an occasional malfunction.

So I took it over to Larry at SPS Guns, and after a few minutes, his on-premises gunsmith — who looks about twelve years old, but they all do nowadays — diagnosed the problem:  the front of the ejector rod was sticking:

…most likely because it was no longer straight — the tip had been peened in one spot and the ejector rod ever-so-slightly bent out of true, no doubt by someone performing The Idiot Twist to close it up.  This was why the malf only repeated occasionally:  the peening and bend would only cause a malfunction depending on the position of the rod.

Anyway, the problem was fixed by the gunsmith ($$$) because I sure as hell wasn’t going to try, and after about a hundred or so repetitions the problem did not reappear.  He also cleaned up the gun, getting rid of all the crud I hadn’t been able to reach, yeah unto the innards of the gun itself.  (I don’t open up revolvers if I can help it;  I don’t do it often enough to trust myself to do the job properly.)

Anyway, all is now well:  a lengthy range session followed (just to dirty the piece up again, whatever), and the Model 65 could resume its rightful place on the bedside table.

By the way:  I bought the Model 65 secondhand, of course, and not knowing how well it was treated by its previous owner(s), I don’t load it up with .357 Magnums, but with .38 Spec+P:

I do know, now, that at least someone had been using The Idiot Twist in the gun’s previous life.

Do thou not the same with thine.

Classic Beauties: Mistresses (5)

Classic Beauty

Let’s start with England’s James II:

Arabella Churchill

…and

Dorothy Sedley

…then on to France’s Napoleon Bonaparte:

Maria Walewska

…and his nephew, Napoleon III:

Harriet Howard

Rachel Félix

Virginie Castiglione

Back across the Channel, we have England’s William IV:

Dorothea Jordan

And finally, across the Atlantic, the mistress of yet another William:

Monica Lewinsky

Intersections

Entertainment

At the DM, Brian Viner lists his 100 Greatest Movies ever made.  Rather than come up with my own, let me go down his selection and simply list those with which I agree, and those I don’t (just follow along his article for the synopses).  If I think he’s missed one, I’ll put it at the end.  YMMV.

The Godfather.  No argument, although I think I and II  should be treated as a single movie, because they actually are.
The Wizard of Oz.  Agree.
Psycho.  Agree.
Jaws.  Agree.
Some Like It Hot.  Disagree, but only mildly.  Top 200, maybe.
Casablanca.  Agree.
One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest.  Agree.
Lawrence Of Arabia.  Agree.
The Graduate.  Agree.
Citizen Kane.  I have a problem with this one because I don’t like it.  But as a groundbreaking movie for its time, I guess it’s worth inclusion.
Bonnie and Clyde.  Agree.
Apocalypse Now.  Strongly disagree.  It’s a weak movie — and to prove my point, the unforgettable scene with Robert Duvall is the best part of the movie even though it’s completely irrelevant to the plot.
Singin’ In The Rain.  Disagree.  Another candidate for top 200, but An American In Paris would have been a better choice.
The Apartment.  Agree.
Shoah.  Is it important?  Yes.  Is it a great movie?  No.  Few documentaries are.
Modern Times.  Agree.
Brief Encounter.  Agree.
Double Indemnity.  Agree.
The Banshees Of Inisherin.  Disagree.  I’ve tried to watch this movie on three separate occasions, and have still never managed it all the way through.
Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs.  Agree.  (Although as animated Disney movies go, I prefer The Lady And The Tramp.)
The Sound Of Music.  Meh.  My Fair Lady  was better.
Kind Hearts And Coronets.  Disagree, but only mildly.  Top 200, maybe.
The Silence Of The Lambs.  Agree.
The Maltese Falcon.  Disagree.  Flimsy plot, bad acting.  Double Indemnity was far better, as was Farewell My Lovely (both versions).
The French Connection.  Agree.
Alien.  Agree, because it transcends science fiction (which I’m not a fan of).  I agree with the inclusion of
Star Wars for the same reason.
Butch Cassidy And The Sundance Kid.  Agree.
Annie Hall.  Sorta-agree.  I don’t think Woody Allen is a good director, although his Midnight In Paris  was superb — less introspective, less gauche, much better than Annie Hall, but still not in the top 100.
Raging Bull.  Agree.  Easily the greatest biopic ever made.
Pulp Fiction.  Agree.  The only one of Tarantino’s movies I’ve ever watched more than once.
It’s A Wonderful Life.  Agree.
The Life And Death Of Colonel Blimp.  Never seen it.  Maybe I should.
The General.  Agree.
The Bridge On The River Kwai.  Agree.
There Will Be Blood.  Agree.
Taxi Driver.  Agree.
The Deer Hunter.  Agree.
2001: A Space Odyssey.  Disagree.  Boring, pretentious and long-winded.
Seven Samurai.  Agree, and I also like The Magnificent Seven.
Vertigo.  Disagree.  It’s Hitchcock, but it’s not what I’d consider a great movie.
All About Eve.  Agree.
Top Hat.  Disagree.   I love me some Fred ‘n Ginger as much or more than anyone else, but they’re not Great Movies.
Bicycle Thieves.  Agree.
On The Waterfront.  Agree.
Nashville.  Agree.
Rome, Open City.  Never saw it.
Duck Soup. Agree, but prefer Monkey Business.
The Searchers.  Agree.
The Conversation.  Agree.
Dr. Strangelove.  Agree.
Boyhood.  Haven’t seen it.
Schindler’s List.  Agree.
The Producers.  Sorta-agree, although I can’t stand Mel Brooks.
No Country For Old Men.  Agree.
Monty Python’s Life Of Brian.  Agree.
Tokyo Story.  Never saw it.
The Elephant Man.  Agree.
Deliverance.  Agree.
Apollo 11.  See my rap on Shoah, above.
What Ever Happened To Baby Jane?  Agree.
Spartacus.  Agree.  Grudgingly.
Toy Story.  Agree.
The Lives Of Others.  Agree.
The Good, the Bad and the Ugly.  Disagree.  Fun movie, but definitely not “great”.
West Side Story.  Disagree.  High-class camp.
The Third Man.  Agree.
Shakespeare In Love.  Agree.
His Girl Friday.  Agree.
Henry V.  Agree.
The Shining.  Disagree.  Run-of-the-mill horror flick.  Ask yourself:  if it had been any actor other than Jack, would this movie make any list?
Chinatown.  Agree.
Zulu.  Agree.
Sunset Boulevard.  Agree.
City Lights.  Agree.
Gone With The Wind.  Agree.
The Best Years Of Our Lives.  Agree.
Ben Hur.  Maybe, but better than Spartacus, anyway.
Get Out.  Haven’t seen it, doubt that I will because I’ve already seen Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner?
Night Of The Hunter.  Agree.
Rear Window.  Agree.  In truth, only Hitchcock’s Psycho and Rear Window  belong on this list.
Star Wars.  Agree.  But only the very first (third?) one.
Parasite.  Agree.
All The President’s Men.  Disagree.  As history, it sucks.  As a thriller, it’s boring.
High Noon.  Agree.
The Exorcist.  Disagree.  Compelling, frightening, but not great.  (Ditto The Omen, for the same reason.)
Kes.  Disagree.
Shane.  Agree.
Chariots of Fire.  Agree.
It Happened One Night.  Agree.
12 Angry Men.  Agree.
When We Were Kings.  Never saw it.
The Vanishing.  Agree.
The Sting.  Agree.
To Kill A Mockingbird.  Agree.
This Is Spinal Tap.  Disagree.  Loved the movie, but “great” it ain’t.
In The Heat Of The Night.  Agree.
Goldfinger.  Disagree.  None of the Bond movies is “great”.  Fun, yes… but not great.
Raiders Of The Lost Ark.  Agree.  But none of the sequels (see:  Star Wars).
Thelma And Louise.  Agree.
Oliver!  Disagree!  despite outstanding performances from Ron Moody and Oliver Reed.

Notable omissions:

The Lady Eve.  Preston Sturges, Barbara Stanwyck and Henry Fonda.  Brilliant comedy.
The Postman Always Rings Twice.  Inexplicable omission.  The original with John Garfield or the Jack Nicholson remake would make my list.
Scenes From A Marriage.  Ingmar Bergman, ’nuff said.
Rocky.  No-hoper nearly makes it.  An American story.
Full Metal Jacket.  Another American story.
Badlands.  And a third, only this one about real people, sorta.
The Lion In Winter.  Quite easily one of the best historical dramas ever filmed.  If not this, then
A Man For All Seasons.  I’m not sure that anyone could argue against this one being on a top 20 list, let alone a top 100.  Inexplicable omission.
Notorious.  Possibly the best Hitchcock movie, and could replace either Psycho or Rear Window in the above list.
The Long Riders.  Inexplicable omission.  It and the next one could tie for “best Western ever made”, with all due respect to The Searchers.
Unforgiven.  Best Clint Eastwood movie ever made.  And let’s not forget
Stagecoach.
In Bruges.  I’d put this on the list way ahead of The Banshees Of Inisherin.  Same principal actors, even.
Pandora’s Box.  Did someone forget the early German movies?  I didn’t.
Fargo.  The Coen Brothers at their wicked best.
The Matrix.  One of the better concepts in any sci-fi / dystopia movie.  As was
Blade Runner.  Omitted?  I’m not even a fan of the genre, but it was a brilliant movie.
A Clockwork Orange.  The best Kubrick movie.
Brazil.  Leaving out this movie and the previous three makes me think that Viner either doesn’t like or doesn’t understand the dystopia genre.
Being There.  Are you kidding me?  One of the greatest satirical movies ever, not to mention Peter Sellers being brilliant.
Rescuers Down Under.  Best animated cartoon movie ever made.
Zeffirelli’s Romeo And Juliet.  Beats out West Side Story, by ten lengths.
From Here To Eternity.  Better than any three other war movies combined, excluding
Aces High.  One of the grittiest war movies ever.  And speaking of which, there’s also
All Quiet On The Western Front — the first b&w version.
Grapes of Wrath.  I guess Okies don’t play well in Britishland.
Bound For Glory.  Even though Guthrie was a Commie rat.  It’s Hal Ashby, FFS.  Also
The Last Picture Show for the same reason.
Nosferatu.  Horror horror horror.
E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial.  Brilliant sci-fi.  As is
Starman.
The 400 Blows.  François Truffaut’s debut movie.  Good grief.
Fahrenheit 451.  Eerily prophetic, but not as bad as the present day.  Also notable as having been directed by Truffaut in English, when he could barely speak a word of it — and by the way, Viner seems to have forgotten or ignored all French directors, not one of whose works made his list.  So much for being a movie critic.

So I’ve disagreed with fifteen or so of Viner’s century, and suggested three dozen or so alternatives.

Finally, my total ringer:  September Affair.  And not just for its theme song.

Feel free to add your own, or to disagree with any of the above.