!SCIENCE!

...yeah, this is going to end well.

...see above.
Darwin Award contenders:

...betcha never saw that one coming now, did ya?

...cops probably pushed him off, just to save on paperwork.
Doctors… what would we do without them?

...cause of death not pneumonia or smallpox, then? [/surprised look]
The mother of two beaten in the hammer attack – if this was still 2020 someone would test her mangled body for COVID 19 and if she had it they would add her to the SCAM DEMIC statistics for dying from the scary virus.
I can imagine The New York Post’s headline: “Managing director takes the fun out of funicular”.
The kite string th8ng isn’t that unusual on the subcontinent. They do a thing where they fly kites and try cut other kites with Kevlar strings with blades on them. A lot of injuries from it.
I’d think there would be a LOT more paperwork for an officer-involved death than just a simple arrest.