- After the age of 35, never go on top unless it’s reverse cowgirl. (Executive Summary: your face looks like a bloodhound as the skin sags.) Just beware of the reverse cowgirl too, because he’s going to get a good view of your saggy, wrinkled butt. It’s far less stressful to do the naughty under these conditions:
- If you’re going to go for a toyboy, the ideal formula is: your age divided by two, and above. If the result is less than 30, you should be ashamed of yourself. Ignore if fabulously rich or else once fabulously gorgeous, e.g. Joan Collins.
- Over the age of 50, never be photographed showing your knees, unless you’re sitting down with legs bent (see pics below of Jane Seymour, 74, who follows this rule religiously).
(Executive Summary: Wrinkles around the knees are like rings on a tree: they increase with age.)
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I thought the age rule was half your age plus 7, such that a 50 year old shouldn’t date anyone younger than 32. Not that I’ve ever had that option since I’ve been married for 30 years.
That age rule applies to men. Women’s guidelines are different, don’t ask me why.
Aren’t ALL guidelines different for women, across the whole spectrum?
‘Twas ever thus.