Headlines, with pissy pithy comments.
1) Militant Vegan Gets Smacked By Court — guy should have just shot the bitch. And in a totally unrelated piece of news…
2) Veganism Makes You Stupid — most religions, when they mess with your diet, are also stupid.
3) Stupid Is Hereditary, If Vegan — fortunately, most vegans appear to be childless, as they’re too tired to have sex, probably. Although it would appear that the only thing more stupid than vegans are Customs officials, as below.
4) Vegan “Food” Mistaken For Drugs — although I could probably understand that the crap probably set off the drug-sniffing dogs, their howls of disgust mistaken for drug-triggering.
5) Vegan Eats Meat, Survives — she probably thought it was delicious, until told there was Evil Meat inside. What’s funny is that she never noticed it was meat. Clearly, her “vegan-radar” was deficient (amongst so many other deficiencies).
6) KFC Tests Meatless Meats — as long as this insanity doesn’t spread to Chik-Fil-A, I’m cool.
7) …As Does Greggs — as if the news about their shrinking pastries wasn’t bad enough… and with that, I can now officially announce the arrival of End Times.