5 Worst Places To Spend The Night

In ascending order of horrible:

  • with “Uncle” Gavin
  • in a C-47 Dakota en route to an active duty deployment
  • any motel room on U.S. 30 in Illinois (don’t ask me how I know this)
  • in a hotel toilet stall after getting mindless drunk (see above)
  • in a prison cell, with D’Marcus Washington as a cellmate

…and a bonus for my Brit Readers:

  • Alan Carr’s bedroom.

Your suggestions in Comments… (and “in my ex-wife’s bed” doesn’t count).


  1. -Third world airport waiting room (including LAX)
    -Inside a broken down truck, near a third world swamp

  2. Alan Carr? Ooh! 🙂 His husband might object, though.

    Actually, if you were to meet him you might like him. Here’s what Wikipedia has to say:

    Carr is openly homosexual, he does not consider his sexuality to be a focal part of his act, once saying, “I just think gay people need to get over themselves. Just because you’re gay and on the telly doesn’t mean you’re a role model. I’m just a comedian. That’s all I am. What am I meant to do? Do I go down the Julian Clary route and talk about fisting and poppers? I don’t talk about being gay and I think what better equality for gays than that?…

    On 21 September 2006, Carr and entertainer Lionel Blair helped save a man who was about to fall from a pier in Blackpool. The man was holding on by his fingertips, but the two men managed to pull him to safety.

    Sounds like a sound man to me.

    For my own suggestion:

    First night away from home at your new boarding school.

  3. On the “Loneliest Road in America” (US-50) next to your stuffed whatever, with the usual supply of emergency provisions (none), in the Winter.
    (sound familiar Kim?)

  4. “any motel room on U.S. 30 in Illinois (don’t ask me how I know this)”

    Been to Joliet, have we?

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