Caution To The Terminally Stupid

Here’s a trend that should need no warning, but clearly one should be made:

Deaths on safari are on the rise, with several reports in the last 18 months alone.

The most recent case of this was in July 2025, when a British tourist and her friend from New Zealand were killed by a charging elephant during a ‘sunrise safari walk’ in Zambia.

In July 2024, a Spanish tourist was horrifically crushed to death in front of his screaming fiancee by an angry herd of elephants after he got out of his car to take photographs in a South African game reserve.

Two months prior to that, Lisa Manders, 70, from the US state of Connecticut, was killed by a hippo in Zambia, while out on a ‘bush walk’ during a dream safari trip with her husband Craig.

And in April last year, a crazed bull elephant attacked tourists on safari in Zambia, leaving an American woman dead, after chasing a safari truck for more than half a mile through a national park.

Earlier this month, terrifying footage emerged of an elephant flipping over a safari canoe and trying to crush a woman to death in the Okavango Delta in Botswana.

Folks, hear me now:  the African bush is a really, really dangerous place.  If there’s one thing that Africa excels at, it’s finding ways to kill you.  Whether sickness (pick one from a list of literally hundreds), insects like scorpions or spiders, reptiles like snakes or crocodiles, and most horribly, some of the animals above — any time you step outside a shelter of some kind, you are no longer the apex predator.

Just remember that all over Africa, professional hunters — even those who excel in bushcraft and are excellent shots with their large-caliber rifles — cannot get life insurance, at any price.  And if these tough bastards are likely to die from any of the above, vulnerable little you are going to be like a marshmallow treat to a lion, leopard or whatever.

Game watching in Africa is a glorious experience.  I’ve done it myself, more times than I can count.  But I always stayed in my car — hell, most of the time I wouldn’t even roll down the window — because when it comes to Things That Bite, I am the world’s biggest coward, and I admit it unashamedly.

And when it comes to hunting, I am an even bigger coward.  I’ve never hunted Cape buffalo, for example, because they scare the shit out of me — even more so than lions, where I’ve had some modest success.  In case you’re wondering, there’s a true story of a guy who whacked a buff, and when looking over the dead animal, found not only his but two “extra” bullet holes in its hide;  bullet holes that had healed, without affecting the animal’s health in any serious way.  (Turns out they were AK-47 7.62x39mm bullets, i.e. from poacher’s gun, which is instructive as to the inadequacy of using any light cartridge on these beasts.)

There is no amount of money that would get me into a canoe on any body of water out there in the African bush.

“Dangerous game” in Africa is not a misnomer, and the worst thing about African predators is how incredibly fast they are when it comes to getting their prey.  Sure, people have survived attacks before;  but as any African bookie will tell you, that’s not the way to bet.

And getting out of the safety of your vehicle just to get a close-up shot of an animal?  Sheesh, that’s why some smart guy invented the telephoto lens.  You would be quite safe inside one of those M1 Abrams tanks, of course;  but the minute you step outside to have a pee, you will become an instant menu item and Africa, most assuredly, will win again.

Woke Up

I guess we can all sleep easier in our beds now:

Billionaire Bill Gates has dramatically changed his position on climate change, acknowledging for this first time there is no “doomsday” risk from global warming.

In a memo published by Gates Notes Monday night, the Microsoft co-founder, who has poured billions into combating global warming, urged a move away from what he called a “doomsday outlook” and toward improving living conditions in developing nations.

“Although climate change will have serious consequences — particularly for people in the poorest countries — it will not lead to humanity’s demise,” Gates wrote. “People will be able to live and thrive in most places on Earth for the foreseeable future.”

Hey Bill:  as long as you use your money and not taxpayer money to improve living conditions in developing nations (what we call “shitholes”), knock yourself out.

I wonder what made him change his mind about the looming catastrophe that is Global Warming Climate Cooling Change©?

Whatever it was, it has to do with money.  Count on it.

Quote Of The Day

From The Divine Sarah:

“Communism is a hot house plant because it originates from intellectual abstraction; because it doesn’t work mathematically; because, contrary to image, its biggest fans are always intellectuals of a certain type; because it can’t survive without leeching off functional systems, and because it can’t survive the free dissemination of information.”

If by “intellectual” she means “of the mind”, then I agree.  But a socio-economic theory that cannot stand up to the most basic of questions is the province of the unutterably foolish, not of actual rational intellectual thought.

Where’s The Beef?

Following on from my previous post about the inadvisability of importing furrin (Argy) beef, allow me to point out the following things.

First:

Mo-Kan Livestock owner Jim Hertzog told the lawmaker that another issue involves small cattle herds.

“We’re short on numbers. It’s just that simple, and the reason we’re short on numbers is three years of drought, and a lot of cows were sold and slaughtered, and they’re not there to raise the calves,” Hertzog said.

He added that the solution is to “rebuild the herd. The solution is not to bring in other beef.”

And as for those steep beef prices at the supermarket:

Restaurant owner Sherry Keegan blamed large packing houses. “It’s the big four, big five packing houses. They tend to manipulate the pricing by shortening their kill days,” she said.

Keegan explained that “rather than killing five days a week, having a five-day-a-week slaughter schedule, they’ll reduce it down to three days and the price of beef, price of meat will go up.”

The second may also be a result of the first, however (although Big Meat have never been known for their lack of greed and cupidity).  Another reason for their slaughter slowdown could be a shortage of illegal alien workers in the packing plants…

Anyway, next up:

Matt Pearce, owner of Pearce Cattle Company, and Steve Lucie, a fifth-generation rancher, appeared on Newsmax’s “National Report” to discuss the increase of beef imports from Argentina aimed at driving down food costs in the U.S.

Pearce warned that importing foreign beef could expose U.S. herds to dangerous diseases and undermine domestic producers already struggling with high costs.

And finally:

The USDA said the national cattle herd is at a 75-year low, while consumer demand for beef has grown 9% over the past decade.

Because it takes time to rebuild herds, the department said it is investing to stabilize markets for ranchers over the long term and to make beef more affordable.

Ah yes… government stepping in to help solve a problem that they created in the first place.

The plan calls for the Agriculture and Interior departments to “streamline and expand” ranchers’ abilities to graze on federal lands.  It will prioritize grazing on an estimated 24 million acres of vacant allotments across the country.

By the way, the reason that ranching permits were reduced came courtesy of the AgDept during the FuckJoeBiden administration, because it was all part of the drive to make consumers start eating insects instead of beef, or to cut back the effect of cow flatulence on the environment, or some other crap. #BigGreenStupidity

Read all three linked articles to get a full flavor of the complexity of the issue.

There is so much bullshit [sic]  involved in this whole business that I’m starting to favor a simple solution to this Gordian Knot:

Feel free to suggest who or what should be at the naughty end of this gun barrel.

When The Market Bites Back

Probably one of the first golden rules of business is “Never anger your existing customers, and never ignore those customers in chasing after new customers”.

I seem to bang on about this endlessly, but I’m always reminded of just how stupid management can be in ignoring that rule.

Now add on an unbelievably-stupid rationale for changing a company’s product line, and…

Wait.

There’s a much better way to look at this foolishness.

First, I invite you to watch Richard Hammond talking about some new Porsche he test drives at the old Top Gear track.  Because if you watch his glee and excitement, then this little video about Porsche’s idiocy becomes all the more understandable.  (Note especially the effect of Porsche’s marketing decisions on their share price and earnings.)

Nice one, dickheads.