Author: Kim du Toit

“Second-Tier” Revolvers

Gratuitous Gun Pics, The Gun Thing

They’re not the “flagship” models that jump immediately to mind when one talks of proud handgun manufacturers like Colt or Smith & Wesson.

Say “Colt revolver”, for instance, and the word that jumps immediately to mind is “Python”:

…and a lovely thing it is, too. [pause to wipe drool from chin]

But what if you can’t afford the $5 grand price tag for an original (79-80s era) Colt revolver?  Step forward its predecessor, the Trooper:

Now I have to tell y’all, I love love love this gun.  Sure, it doesn’t have the heavy barrel underlug of the Python, and maybe its trigger isn’t quite as good — maybe — but I have to say that it’s a sexy beast all by itself.  Point is, though, that as pictured, the Trooper is an astounding $1,500 cheaper than the Python, and while still expensive — it’s a minty Colt, FFS, what did you expect? — it’s not exactly a huge stepdown in quality either.

It must be said that Smiths are miles cheaper than most Colt revolvers, so there’s not much difference between the models, cost-wise.  But sticking with .357 Mag models with ~6″ barrels, the S&W Model 686 is a peach of a revolver:


…and I know that many of you have one (!) and swear by it.  I would, too, and did (before the Tragic Canoe Accident On The Brazos River).

But spare a moment for the venerable Model 60:


Honestly, I prefer the latter even if its J-frame is not as stout as that of the L-frame 686 (heck, my bedside gun is a K-frame Model 65, and I don’t feel bad about it).  And yes I know, the 60 is a five-shooter and not a six/seven-shooter like the 686.  A cursory perusal of gun articles over the years is replete with titles like “Model 60 — the only revolver you’ll ever need?”, so there’s that.

Frankly, I think the Model 60 is a more stylish gun — its slender barrel with a semi-underlug / ejector shroud is (that word again) sexy, and the one in the above pic has me drooling again.  WANT.

Branch line:  Some of you Smith fanatics adherents are going to compare the Python to the blued Mod 586:



…but no;  the Python’s trigger is not only better, but in a different class, sorry.  Not that I hate the 586, oh perish the thought, but… no.

Okay, all this talk of guns (and the pictures that accompany them) means that I have to go to the range, now.  Talk amongst yourselves…

Uh Huh

Drive Time

Headline and sub-head for this article:

Quickest Pickup Trucks We’ve Ever Tested

The quickest on the list weighs more than 6800 pounds and is quicker than a Porsche 718 Cayman GT4

…right up until you get to take a corner, whereupon they more closely resemble the drum of a Whirlpool spin dryer.

They might do quite well in the Dakar Rally, actually, but they’d be up against some interesting competition:

…or however they say it in German.

Understand, I’m not saying that the auto companies shouldn’t make these behemoth speedsters — they must, because America — but people need to be careful about choosing their comparisons.

“Dear Dr. Kim”

Advice

“Dear Dr. Kim:

“I’m a rather well-known Hollywood actor in my late 40s who has a reputation for only bonking dating women younger than 25 years old — in fact, I generally ditch them shortly after their 25th birthday.

“For some reason, this seems to have pissed some people off.  They say I should ‘date women my own age’ or ‘stop cradle-snatching’.

“Here’s my philosophy.  After they pass 25, all the women I’ve met start to droop and sag, and even worse they want to start breeding like rabbits, and this makes them very unattractive to me because post-baby bods have droopy boobs, doughy tummies and tunnel-vag syndrome.  Also, the thought of dating women around my own age makes me a little nauseated — I mean, I know chicks like Amanda Holden (53) and Salma Hayek (56) are totally hot, BUT:  they’re all married and they have kids.  While I’m not really averse to having kids of my own (in principle, anyway), I’d rather not have to look after someone else’s, especially as women of my age tend to have daughters aged 16-24, and you KNOW where that might lead.

“Actually, their bodies are only part of the problem.  Sure, the under-25s are kinda brainless (in the ignorance sense), but “older” women are, if you’ll excuse the expression, bat-shit crazy and neurotic (and believe me, I know what I’m talking about).  While the latter are more mature, their psychological problems are equally advanced, whereas the younger women just don’t seem to have those issues.

“Anyway, Dr. Kim, what do I do about all this date-shaming?”

— Just Call Me Leo

Dear Leo:

Tell ’em all to fuck off.  Seriously.  If that old hag Cher can date some beardless weenie forty years younger than herself and nobody kvetches or scolds her, then why should you worry?  It’s not like your fresh girlfriends don’t know the rules of the game, n’est-ce pas? and they all seem quite okay with it.  Maybe it’s the fact that you fulfill all their twisted little fantasies:  fame, a jet-set lifestyle, trendy parties, beach vacations on tropical islands or large yachts, lots of sparkly little presents and, lest we forget (and according to urban legend) they also get frequently serviced by a large male appendage.  No wonder there’s a long line of early-20 hotties outside your door.

You seem to have it all figured out, so why change?  But if you want to shut the scolds up for a while, hold your nose and fuck date a childless hottie between ages 28-32 for a while, and then all the Jealous Ones will say, “Ah, good!”  and turn their envious Karen-gaze elsewhere . Then, when they’re not looking, dump Miss Middle-Age and resume the sub-25 thing.  Your excuse:  “Hey, I tried!”

Know this, however:  you are the envy of all men on the planet, who would do exactly what you’re doing if they could.

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