Reader Clark W. sends me this email:
I’d like to ask for your expertise. I’m looking into buying a gun for my wife, and since her hands are about half the size mine I can’t get one I’m used to. She’s 5-1&1/2 (she insists on the 1/2 inch), but she has the strength and mass to handle a decent recoil. What would you recommend for a woman with small hands?
I was going to reply by email, but then it struck me that it’s best written as a post, most especially because Reader Clark’s dilemma is not exclusive to his wife.
Thankfully, there are all sorts of options out there nowadays — which kinda adds to the difficulty because with choice comes indecision, as we all know.
Let’s get a few parameters set before we begin the discussion. First: caliber.
I am not a fan of the 9mm Parabellum / 9mm Luger in a self-defense handgun, as any fule kno. But there are precious few calibers that are both effective stoppers and light in recoil. Newton’s various laws all apply, and are immutable. Also, the smaller size of the cartridge means that one can carry more ammo for the gun, in a magazine and its backups, if required. Finally, having small hands really dictates a smaller-framed gun, which means that carrying a more powerful chambering (like, say, .45 ACP or .357 Magnum) means that recoil is going to be massive.
When I say that I (with my big hands and stout frame) absolutely hate shooting the .357 Mag in a 2″-barreled revolver, let that be a salutary warning.
And because I insist that people practice and train with their carry piece, consider that if recoil is massive, you’re going to do less of both simply because shooting lots of rounds gets painful after a while, which means you’re not only going to do it less, you may develop a flinch when you pull the trigger.
Our second consideration is handgun action.
While a semi-auto pistol does an acceptable job in taming recoil — or at least, it does it better than a revolver — there are also some downsides to that handgun choice. For starters, pistols are more likely to fail than revolvers. Misfeeds, soft strikes of the hammer on primer, failure to eject the spent casing properly: we all know about those issues, none of which happen with a revolver. Because a revolver is like a fork: you pick it up, and it works. That said, reloading a revolver is far more difficult and time-consuming than simply pounding a loaded replacement magazine into your pistol. If you need to reload, that is — because most self-defense needs are handled with fewer than five shots, unless there happens to be more than one assailant facing you. Then things start to get increasingly fuzzy, in a bad way.
On the other hand, a pistol is less bulky than a revolver, so there’s a concealability issue (our third consideration) involved too.
Okay, that’s enough background. Let’s look at the options for our small-handed lady shooter.
Revolver:
1. Smith & Wesson Lady Smith Mod 60 in .38 Special (or .38 Spec +P, which is almost as effective as a .357 from a short barrel), and which carries 5 rounds in the cylinder:
Also available in the “snag-free” hammerless alloy Mod 642 version:
I carry a similar model, the Mod 637 Airweight as a backup, and although it almost disappears inside my fist, the same would not be true for Clark’s missus.
Oh, and it should be stressed that if you’re going this route, be sure to load your gun with decent self-defense ammo (as opposed to full metal jackets); I use Hornady Critical Defense 110-grain:
…which recoils less than the typically-heavier .38 Spec bullet, but tests at parity.
2. Ruger SP101 in .38 Special:
The SP101 is a little larger and heavier than the Smith revolvers above, and also holds only 5 rounds. But the Ruger is pretty much indestructible — not that the Smith is at all fragile — and in any event you should have a choice between revolvers, if that’s the way you’re going. And should you want a slightly longer barrel, the SP101 has a 4-inch (and 6-inch, not optimal for carry) option.
I would not recommend any brands other than the above. The budget brands (Taurus, Rossi etc.) may be cheaper, but because lower cost invariably involves compromise, they’re likely to be less reliable. Some reviews have waxed lyrical about Rock Island .38 revolvers, but I’ve fired a few and found their triggers to be absolutely dreadful — heavy, sticky and not consistent.
On the other end of the scale: of Colt revolvers we will not speak (unless you get a bonus or something) because they typically carry a 50% price premium over the Smiths and Rugers. Okay, here’s the 3″ Python:
…which is undeniably beautiful, but like I said, it’s spendy (and also considerably larger than the above two models: not recommended for the Small Hands Set). But unsurprisingly, it has the best trigger — perhaps the best out-of-the-box trigger action of any revolver.
Now let’s look at the semi-automatic pistols. Before I go there, let me say at the outset that self-defense ammo has improved considerably over the past decade or so, which makes a couple of calibers worth considering, and that will be reflected in the suggestions below. They are in no specific order.
1. S&W Bodyguard (Micro) in .380 ACP / 9mm Short:
Yeah, it’s pink. You can get it in black too, or gawd help us in cranberry. I have to say that I love shooting this little honey: the trigger is good and the recoil almost non-existent compared to the bigger 9mm Luger. My own (small-handed) Daughter has one of these, and she loves it.
2. Bersa Thunder in .380 ACP:
Don’t let the Thunder’s cheap price (< $300) fool you. If I were going to carry a .380 pistol, this budget gun would be my first choice. The trigger isn’t as good as the Smith Bodyguard, but it’s just fine. There’s a reason why the Bersa is as popular as it is, and it’s not only because of its price.
3. Ruger LCP in .380 ACP:
There are micros, and then there is the Ruger (a.k.a Kel-Tec, whose design they pretty much just copied). These guns are so small that even the Severely Small-Handed among us will find them a little difficult to handle, and their diminutive size makes them jump around in the hand when shooting, even in .380 ACP. These pistols are definitely in the “better than no gun” category, but I’d add “by not much”.
These are the only three guns I’d consider in this category.
One more time: .380 ACP FMJ 90gr ammo is useless for self-defense. Always go with the spendier and better ammo, both for practice and for carry.
(Note its size compared to the Hornady .38 Spec above… and yes, they are to scale)
Now let’s look at the 9mm Luger pistols. Oy, there are dozens, but I’m going to stick to just a couple of the micro-sized options.
1. Ruger Max-9 9mm:
Basically, this is almost identical, size-wise, to the LCP above. Be warned that the recoil is greater, in consequence.
2. Ruger American Compact 9mm:
To my mind, a better option than the Max-9.
Okay, now we come to the guns that everyone shoots, in 9mm Luger. Let’s start off with the
S&W Shield line, in Micro-Compact and Compact:
I’d get the Compact M.2.0, on the right. The larger size is still manageable in small hands, and the recoil is considerably less than with any micro-compact 9mm Luger pistol.
SIG Sauer 365 line:
We’ll leave the 320 series out of this until all the dust has settled from the “goes off when drops” fuss and has been decided whether it’s a real thing. The 365 is an excellent gun, and you can’t go too much wrong with that choice.
Springfield XD line:
Speaking honestly, if I were in the market for a striker-fired double-action pistol in 9mm, the XD would be in my top 3. It’s a proven and reliable design, and a clone of the already-proven and-reliable Croatian HS design.
Okay, I may as well bite the bullet and get it over with…
Glock Mod 43x line:
Yeah, it comes in black, and purple, and sky-blue, whatever. [sigh]
Look, a huge number of people carry Glocks by choice, and there’s a reason for that — just not one I care to explore or even contemplate. But they’re reliable and accurate, and I happen to shoot the larger Glock 19 more accurately than any other 9mm pistol, so there’s that.
And one more time: carry proper self-defense ammo.
Anyway, as Clint Eastwood always ends his movie direction: that’s enough of that. Doubtless there will be other opinions in Comments and elsewhere, but there ya go. I hope all this was helpful.
Finally, my own recommendation for Mrs. Reader Clark:
Smith & Wesson Mod 60 Lady Smith
…because it’s like a fork: you pick it up and it works, no fussing with safety catches or racking the slide or any of that jive. And if you train enough and/or have the time, you can always cock the hammer first to make Shot #1 a single-action squeeze of the trigger; that’s what I do.
It’s the original “point-and-click” instrument, and it works as well today as it ever has.
Your choice may vary, and frankly there are no horrible choices in all the above. But the Lady Smith is my recommendation.
Take your wife to the range, and have her try out all the guns they have for rent so she can get the one that feels best for her. Just set the target at about 15 feet (5 yards), because that’s most likely the maximum range you’ll ever encounter in that self-defense situation. Try to get all the bullets into a side-plate-sized ring.
Then whatever gun you pick, buy 500 rounds to get familiar with the gun, and a hundred rounds of premium ammo to carry and for occasional practice to keep the hand in, so to speak.
Give her my regards.
And THIS is why, after over 40 years of shooting my own self, I sill come to the Maestro occasionally for firearms advice. Outstanding survey of choices for the little lady, bravo!
I have nothing to add on the guns, however I do have one tip for her if she chooses a semi-auto. Having trained several ladies on pistol shooting over the years, I’ve found many have issues racking the slide and choose the .380 over 9mm for that reason. As Kim has said, ammo improvements over the years have made the .380 more desirable…well, less undesirable as a defensive cartridge, but the 9mm is generally to be preferred. That said you need an assailant to STOP whatever mischief he has in mind, not necessarily lower his body temperature to room temperature (just a little side bonus, if it happens, but not necessary), and MOST perps will lose interest in whatever they had in mind after getting shot with a couple rounds of just about anything.
That said, if your wife enjoys shooting the 9mm, or finds it tolerable, I’d lean that way as a matter of choice, over the .380, and most ladies I’ve worked with at the range do not have issues shooting the 9mm, rather they may find racking the slide more difficult. That’s due to the immutable laws of physics Kim notes, the 9 requires a heavier recoil spring.
So here’s the tip, and no, I have no earthly idea WHY this works, but rest assured it does work and works well. It’s a mental thing rather than a physical thing. Most people will naturally try to rack a pistol slide by pinching it between the thumb and forefinger of their off hand and pull back. If that works, fine, but if your wife complains about the difficulty of racking the slide, don’t go to the .380 just yet.
Instead, have her do an over the top grip, thumb pointing back at her, pinching the slide between the palm of her hand and all four fingers—and here’s the trick—DO NOT PULL BACK WITH THE OFF HAND—instead mentally concentrate on PUSHING the frame away from her. Tell her to just forget about the off hand it’s just there to hold the slide where it is, the racking motion is to vigorously push the frame away from her.
Nine times out of ten the reaction I get is a look of wide-eyed surprise, and an exclamation of, “Wow, that’s SO much easier!” I have no clue why this works, but this along with the Rob Haught push/pull shotgun technique are, perhaps, the two best shooting tips I’ve ever heard after focus on the front sight.
Have fun at the range. And unless you have a truly exceptional marriage, get someone else to coach her, not you. It’s not that you’ll end up irritated with each other, but that she will question EVERYTHING you tell her, and what she does accept will only be after a countless litany of WHY? questions. Have a shooting buddy teach her. She KNOWS you’re an idiot, she lives with you. Your buddy? To her, he will seem like John Wick. I don’t pretend to understand the marital relationship dynamic here, any more than the tip, but I’ve observed this to be the case countless times, too.
Good luck! Congrats on getting her interested in her own self defense!!
Great advice from Kim and JC.
Buy ammunition and practice. When punching paper gets dull, do an internet search for pistol drills. I printed out many of them and put them into a three ring binder so I can bring it to the range. Rather than just make noise at the range, I go with purpose to work on something. Work on grip, trigger squeeze, multiple shots on one target, addressing multiple targets, multiple shots on multiple targets, change distances, change target heights. I can’t practice draw at my club unfortunately. Also, grab a timer and a notebook. Record the drills and your times so you can see how you can improve against your past times. Dot torture is a great drill with 50 rounds that goes through several exercises.
Look hard for a similar handgun in 22lr. Ideally it will be exactly like your carry piece. This gives you an opportunity to do lots of drills cheaply.
Oh and for a revolver, look hard at the Safariland Comp I and Comp II speed loaders. I find they hold the cartridges more securely than the HKS style and it’s one motion to push the cartridges into the cylinder than two motions of HKS, push the cartridges into the cylinder then rotate the knob.
Good luck and have fun!
Couple of notes – my wife could not rack the slide on my S&W Shield. I think they now have an easy slide option, but yeah, take her to the gun store and see if she can pull the slide back before spending money. Also of note is that the S&W magazines have a VERY stiff magazine spring and she couldn’t load rounds in the mag either. I actually cut my spring down a half round to make loading easier – haven’t noticed any problems with doing that either. (She has RA and that has drastically reduced her hand strength).
On the other hand, the baby Glock .380 is like butter on toast. My wife can load it, rack the slide, and generally get all the bullets going in the same direction. That’d be my recommendation for a starter gun. As Kim said, they are popular for a reason. And no, I don’t remember the Glock model number, easier to just call it the baby Glock.
The lady Smith is a beaut and the SP101 is built like a tank. Either would be nice. Also, Colt has a cheaper option with the Viper, but I found the odd-shaped trigger guard bit into my knuckles which ruled it out for me. They also have a Cobra carry model that’s probably a better choice over the Python. I would also like to get my hands on a .327 magnum snubbie and see what it’d do. Six rounds vs five, and with modern ammo might be pretty good. Lots of options there and I don’t really notice any drawbacks to carrying a snubbie over a pistol.
As to the caliber discussion, a .22RF is more effective than harsh language. Just saying.
Point of interest: the SP101 is also available with a 3″ barrel, in both .357 Magnum (load with .38s, obviously) and .327 Federal Mag. .327 might be a bit harsh in terms of muzzle blast and recoil, but a stout .32 H&R Mag doesn’t give up much to .38 SPL in terms of stopping power, but with less recoil and you get 6 in the gun instead of 5.
My wife and daughter have small hands, and I’ve got a couple recommendations not otherwise listed above.
If you can find someone with a Sig P239 or a P225A1 the reach to the trigger MIGHT be short enough. It is for my wife, but not my daughter (My wife can also *barely* handle a CZ75B.)
What I’m going to look at next is the Girsan MC 14T, the Beretta 80x, and if I can find one a Beretta 86.
As another has pointed out, the S&W Shield is hard to rack. I use a shield for my EDC most of the time and found my health issues were preventing me from pulling the slide back consistently. I tried a couple of add on assists. The first assist was a rubber grippy thing for the back of the slide- it kept falling off. My current “assistant” is a replacement plate for the one in the back of the slide. This one has ears that stick out a bit and help a lot, got it from Tandemcross. The grip shape can be changed with a houge(?) rubber slip on. A work around I use with my hammer guns is to thumb cock the hammer, then rack the slide. That really helps with my 1911’s and berettas and sig. I have a Ruger sp101 in .22. The trigger was very hard and gritty. Some judicious polishing of internals and a spring and shim kit from MCARBO made it 100% better. S&W makes a Shield EZ which is supposed to be easier to rack, haven’t tried. If you want a 22 for tiny hands, I got my daughter a little walther 10 shot, it fit her perfectly. Well, I have to go warm up my
Dremill and flitz metal polish. A mcarbo kit for my new ruger gp100 is arriving in the mail today. It’s 35 today here in Michigan.
I disagree with much of your advice here, and I’m puzzled by your emotional overreaction to the 9mm cartridge, once again on display here. The way you continuously put it down is irksome. And yet you were open to .380 in a carry gun?
A 2 inch .38 snubby is an expert’s gun, and in .357 is just asking to train a new shooter to flinch. Similarly, many .380 autos are blowback operated, and felt recoil is quite high. My Sig 365 XL has less felt recoil than my CZ82 in the less powerful 9mm Mak, which is comparable than .380.
The best piece of advice you gave is this: Take your wife to the range, and have her try out all the guns they have for rent so she can get the one that feels best for her. I rented 8 guns before I made my selection of a carry gun.
As far as racking the slide goes, that’s another reason to consider mounting an optic on your pistol, as a handle. Sometimes, when a shooter has issues with racking, they also have strength issues with limp-wristing while shooting, and automatics may not be for them. I have an arthritic friend who carries 2 revolvers for just this reason.
@thats a good point about renting guns. When my oldest son wanted to get his first non 22 pistol we went to his neighborhood range and when they found he was looking to buy they let him take several rental pistols into the range for the price of 1 it helped him decide.
Gonna disagree here on one thing:
“2 inch .38 snubby is an expert’s gun”
For someone who expects to engage the opposition at 10 yards or so, I agree.
But most small framed women just getting into guns don’t want to go into buildings after the bad guys. They want something for the car jacker, the rapist, the guy who shows up in their bedroom.
And most of us, well, our bedrooms aren’t yards across.
At the ranges where most *actual* self defense happens a 2 inch snubby is going to work just fine. Make sure there’s sufficient quantities of meat on all sides of the barrel, and squeeze twice.
Same with a .380. I’m a 9mm guy, but I’ll happily carry my LCP .380 in conditions where I’m not supposed to have a gun at all. This is purely for defense of *self* and very close family, so I’m not taking across the mall shots, I’m waiting until I smell the tooth decay on their breath. At that range a .380 is going to do every bit as good as a .45, because once you get one or two in the brain housing group size doesn’t matter.
This.
The Late Wife was a brown belt in BJJ, but chronic lung disease robbed her of her ability to take a fight to the ground. She grew up in a military/LEO family and learned to shoot in 1970’s Brazil. She was fearless.
She managed a 9mm semi for most of her adult life, but when chronic lung disease left her with very little strength, she opted for a revolver in .22wmr. Dragging a portable O2 tank to the range, she could put 7 rounds in a fist-sized grouping dead-center skull at 7 yards. She never fired a shot in anger, but she did drive a portable O2 tank into the upper chicklets of a wannabe-mugger in the parking garage of the hospital she was getting respiratory therapy at. She never left home unarmed again.
I think it all depends on what you can hit with what your aiming with. I don’t know anyone willing to take 7 .22wmr slugs to the brain pain to would tell you they are not combat effective.
It is high time for people to update their OBSOLETE KNOWLEDGE around snub barrel ballistics.
The fact is that .38/.357 defensive ammo has also progressed, especially around tuning for 2″ barrel performance. These facts must be known, understood, and integrated into practice and advice.
https://www.luckygunner.com/labs/revolver-ballistics-test/
Read the article, and play with the interactive ballistics table. Sort for barrel length, and take note of which rounds hold their own in terms of muzzle V and terminal effects, even against 4″ barrels.
———-
Another revolver I recommend (and carry daily since my thumbs went all arthritic on me) is the Kimber K6S. It’s a $ premium gun, compared to the S&W snubbies, but IMO worth it. You get 6, not 5 rounds and a sweet trigger comparable to the Python’s in a package dimensionally identical to a J-frame. It strikes the right balance between carry weight and recoil soaking mass, and so it really does sit in a sweet spot.
Saw an interesting piece recently about the .380ACP. Takeaway was surprising: they recommended using FMJ, as they believe achieving the FBI 12″+ penetration is more important than expansion. And that they don’t see 12″ with expanding ammo.
I think that depends – do you want to kill them or just convince them to leave you alone (killing is a bonus, but not necessary in the second option).
Cause you can put a hole clean thru someone but they keep coming and kill you dead. Then bleed out and die 5 minutes later cause you got the full 12 inches of penetration.
Or, the bullet only penetrates 5 inches, but mushrooms to twice the diameter, destroying more tissue and causing more immediate and painful trauma, convincing them that they should probably go somewhere else.
Better yet, get the hollowpoints and mag-dump that .380.
IDK, I’m not the expert but I remember seeing the same study. Seems like they change their opinion every other month on that issue.
The Ruger SP-101 can be found with a 3 inch barrel. Add a Hogue Mongrip and you have a much more controllable small revolver.
Y’all are overlooking the other option for Ruger revolvers, the LCR. They come in .357 Magnum, .38 Special +p, and 9mm (all 5 shot), .327 Federal Magnum (6 shot, the one I have), .22 WMR (8 shot), and .22 LR (10 shot, IIRC). They’re noticeably lighter than the SP-101 but still built like Rugers.
1 & 2 were my first thought on a smaller pistol. The Walther PPK in 32ACP or 380 would be third on my list. A J frame 22WMR like the 351. That 9 shot 22 magnum is lauder than my 357. The thin line single stack 9mm Glock, the G43 (?).
It is no longer summer weather. My NAA 22WMA is sitting on top of the safe. I will clean it before it gets put up for the winter. The S&W 65 is in the shoulder holster for cold weather use.
When I first got my .327 Fed LCR, I had the good fortune to be at the range next to someone w/the .38 version. The basic American Eagle 85 gr loadings in my revolver were very controllable, almost easy to shoot. I asked the neighbor if they wanted to test mine, and I test theirs, they agreed. IMO, the .38 was harder/more painful to shoot, almost as bad as the 100 gr .327 Fed AE round, both kind of wanted to jump out of my hand (one-handed).
One other thing, if you have/get an LCR, take a look at putting on the longer, no-groove Tamer grip that comes with the LCRx, the 3″ bbl model. I sure wish that they would make it in .327…
If you prefer to go to a semi-auto for better concealability and higher shot capacity than a revolver, get one with a locked breech action, not a blowback, and racking the slide will be much, much easier.
Someone above mentioned that bad guys will likely disengage when shot, but in fact, most don’t even need that much discouragement, but will crawl, jump or run away like the vermin they are at just the sight of a gun, because they are usually expecting defenseless victims. With the good defensive ammo available for .380 today, I wouldn’t hesitate to have my wife carry that if she wanted to be armed and was uncomfortable with more powerful calibers.
I can almost guarantee that if a woman follows my tip in the first reply to this, she won’t have any trouble racking a handgun slide. The overhand grip and the forceful PUSH with the dominant hand has worked in all cases where I’ve been coaching a lady. Small sample size, so I can’t completely guarantee it, but I suspect that if done right 90% + of ladies won’t have any trouble. They generally are trying to pull with a pinch grip—not idea.
And don’t cut magazine springs, that’s a malfunction waiting to happen. Get an UpLULA loading tool here. I use it, you don’t have to be a lady to appreciate it for loading magazines.
https://www.amazon.com/Maglula-9-45-UpLULA-Universal/dp/B0FV8XB7NW/ref=sr_1_1?crid=MQFQ46DMDMNM&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.3L6onJd58WnomNmlPrYvj3BszcNYLTI1RNsfDMdXP-2LJr7uo1U50lvKKO2VW4MAYyRdc7DE4e2bxhNrxr42qru3f2JCsJbh1r__nvllIRwrmUcNaNRefv8N5iyVBDw9k_rfDhnvjX9NK_j_v_cm3KS2tP1JvSOJ4w3KJdWI-TfB3ByLX-_sf0rQYeXX10Pp2Hd-eYzWJO6Kv8lVBCyrfVY9hkrQXKOTd2FDOb2hBnMUYQxgjYKl3c2pHodM7uOpu9a91G38LhPLLXrcT-IVO3D5v7cLQ8PoCEARkH_oUH0.PUINUd4vRteZ8OOE070VEQp6VcbdyRkwl9sOCNF-4wQ&dib_tag=se&keywords=uplula+magazine+loader&qid=1763121540&sprefix=UpLULA%2Caps%2C114&sr=8-1
Probably 400 rounds in on my cut spring magazine and zero failures to feed.
I do have several of those easy loader tools, but that’s just one more damn thing to carry when going to the range. I’d rather just have a normal spring tension. I think S&W used a very high strength spring in both the mag and the slide in order to improve reliability in the smaller shield pistols where people might limp-wrist it.
JC’s point about cutting springs is about exercising care. A single half-coil too much will lead to Malf City.
I’ve always just put in a spring with a lower weight gauge, which works perfectly every time.
Are they going to practice and become competent?
No – S&W 642 with Crimson Trace grips. (My wife)
Yes -Any single stack 9mm
Go to a range that has rental guns and LET HER shoot them all till she finds on to her liking.
Any suggestions for 9mm and NOT striker fired because I don’t believe any auto without a thumb safety is really safe?
Sig P938. It’s a mini 1911 action, with a firing pin block so it can’t fire if dropped on the hammer, making carrying with a chambered round very safe, and has a nice feature the 1911 doesn’t have in that you can rack the slide with the safety ON to clear the chamber after a magazine drop. It’s also a locked breech pistol, so racking the slide is very easy. I carry mine cocked and locked.
Only downside to me is the last round is a bugger to push into the magazine because it has a heavy magazine spring, but with some practice it’s not too bad.
Lots of good firearm advice in Kim’s post and in the comments. I think the most important consideration is to get input from the wife. That means getting her to come out to the range and try a variety of options, including ones that probably won’t work for her. When she has enough experience to have an opinion of her own is when it is time to start actually shopping for her gun. If she can’t be talked into coming out to the range a few times, she might not get out to the range to practice with whatever gun you chose for her either. On the other hand, if you’ve got the budget, the search for the right gun for the wife might be a good excuse to buy any number of interesting firearms.
My late wife was a fan of her Taurus G2C, a gun that I never could get happy with. It is now in fine service with my daughter.
Take her to the store, and if possible find a store with a lady salesperson. Let her pick the gun, just point her towards acceptable options.
And Google “lady working slide”. My wife had to grip the slide differently from me, but that grip worked for her every time.