Things that totally suck
I was preparing this post (with a link to Driving Home For Christmas) when I read that the song’s composer Chris Rea died just a few days ago.
Sometimes, the universe has a shitty sense of humor. Although I have to say that this one made me giggle a bit:
Yeah, this one’s going to turn out well for them:
Jaguar’s last ever petrol car came off the assembly line at the brand’s Midlands factory on Friday (19 December) ahead of its daring switch to all-electric vehicles next year.
The final Jaguar model with a combustion engine under its bonnet is an £80,000 high-performance F-Pace SVR SUV finished in black paint, according to the Jaguar Enthusiasts’ Club, which was in attendance as the Solihull factory officially signed off its last petrol model.
Under the bonnet is a burbling 5.0-litre supercharged V8 petrol engine – a stark contrast to the first ‘new Jaguar’ that will debut next year, which is a near-silent four-door GT that will cost almost twice as much, with a quoted £120,000 to £140,000 starting price.
While parent group JLR made no official announcement of the event, the Jaguar Enthusiasts’ Club says the final model is being gifted to the Jaguar Daimler Heritage Trust in Gaydon, where it will be retained as a museum piece.
The club said Friday was a ‘quiet, historic full stop’ for Jaguar’s 90-year relationship with the internal combustion engine.
Yeah, and they’re celebrating this piece of boneheaded idiocy?
No wonder the car, and the staff, are all wearing black:
I think a better payoff line would be:
“Pissing Away 90 Years Of Jaguar Heritage”
Oh, and “full stop” is what’s going to happen to Jaguar’s EV sales, but let’s not spoil the party.
Being a history buff, I’m always attracted to those Eeewww Choob videos that talk about the events that shaped our world. But now I look askance at these videos, and in most cases I turn them off after only a few minutes.
The reason? A.I. narration.
WTF is going on? How difficult can it be to hire a speaker — an actual human — to read a frigging script, instead of turning the script over to some machine to create a sorta-human voice?
I am, as my Readers will know, something of a stickler for correct speech, be it grammar or spelling (in print, of course), and that sticklishness extends very much, oh very much indeed to the spoken word as well.
When I hear mispronounced words — sometimes with several different pronounciations of the same word during the course of the narration — it irks me as much as would a series of different misspellings of the same word in print in the course of a single article or essay.
So no, I’ve made a decision to ignore any video, no matter how interesting the topic, if it uses that stupid, wooden A.I. nonsense.
I’m irritated almost as much, by the way, by A.I.-generated “photos” or pictures, but when it comes to history, of course, there’s not always a photographic record of the event or of the people involved, so I can sort of deal with it. Historical re-enaction using actual human beings can be horribly expensive, for not much benefit, so I can get along with phony actors and scenery.
But when it comes to speech? Ugh, no. There’s just too much dissonance — I mean, my own dissonance — for me to have any respect for the material, no matter the initial interest.
There it is: no more A.I. narration for me. I’d rather just buy a book on the topic.
I’ve been ranting about this issue for about as long as the nonsense first appeared with software-dependent cars. Now it seems as though it’s for real:
Hundreds of Russian Porsche owners have found their cars immobilized across the country, amid fears of deliberate satellite interference.
Drivers have complained that their vehicles have suddenly locked up, lost power and refused to start, as owners and dealerships warn of a growing wave of failures that has left hundreds of vehicles stuck in place.
The nationwide meltdown hit Porsche models built since 2013, which are all fitted with the brand’s factory vehicle tracking system (VTS) satellite-security unit.
The vehicles have been ‘bricked’ with their engines immobilized, due to connections with the satellite system being lost.
Okay: leaving aside the paranoia concerns — it’s the Daily Mail, of course there was going to be some panic warning — let’s just go with the system failure (regardless of cause) that causes one’s normally-reliable car to quit working.
I know I’m not the only person in the world who regards this “development” as creepy and worrisome. The fact that some situation could occur that renders one’s possession useless makes me deeply apprehensive.
As I said earlier, whether the immobilization was a factor of technology fail or else of some malignant third party is unimportant.
Note that this VTS thing is touted as a “security” feature — i.e. one that lessens the effect of the car being tampered with or stolen, a dubious benefit at best — and this supposed security guards against another feature (keyless or remote start) that seems to be all the rage among today’s cars, for no real reason that I can ascertain. In other words, car manufacturers have made it easier to steal their cars, and then have to come up with yet another feature that can negate that situation.
While some drivers were told to try a simple workaround by disconnecting their car batteries for at least 10 hours, others were advised to disable or reboot the Vehicle Tracking System, known as the VTS, which is linked to the alarm module.
Some owners have been stranded for days waiting for on-site diagnostics, tow trucks or emergency technicians.
There are reports of Russians resorting to ‘home-brew’ fixes – ripping out connectors, disconnecting batteries overnight, even dismantling the alarm module.
A few cars were revived after 10 hours without power, but others remained immobilized.
And they call this “improvement”?
By the way, it’s not just Porsche, of course.
Last year, MPs in the United Kingdom were warned that Beijing could remotely stop electric cars manufactured in China, as relations between the two nations deteriorated.
The previous year, lawmakers cautioned that tracking devices from China had been found in UK government vehicles.
Yeah duh, because China is asshoe.
As for Porsche, this makes me realize why their older, non-VTS-equipped models are fetching premium prices in the second-hand market. I mean:
300 grand for an ’87 911? Are you kidding me? (Yeah, I know it’s been fully restored at a cost of about $50 grand — but even taking twice that amount off the asking price would still leave you with a $200 grand ask, which is ridiculous. No wonder the vintage sports car market is starting to tank.)
But at least this 911 isn’t going to stop working every time there’s a meteor shower, or whenever some controlling remote entity decides that you’ve been driving it too fast or too much.
It’s a fucking nightmare. And we’ve allowed it to happen.
…to the above QOTD: I wonder whether this irritation towards the modern world’s increasing (and likely over-) complexity is just a generational thing?
I have no idea as to the age of the commenter in this case, but I know that this disenchantment and hankering after a simpler life seems fairly common among people of my age, for the simple reason that it’s a common factor of life among my friends and, lest we forget, Readers of this here website.
But do the various “Gen” types feel the same way? I mean, we Olde Pharttes can remember (a bit) how much earlier times were less complicated and simpler. But in the case of Teh Youngins, are they even aware that life can be simpler, given that all they’ve ever experienced is Smartphones, the Internet, self-drive cars and refrigerators that can tell you when you’re running low on milk?
And considering that most Millennials, let alone the Gen X/Y/Z tribe don’t know how to change a flat tire, cook a meal from scratch and drive a stick shift, would they embrace a simpler world when so much of their daily life is smoothed by technology?
I suspect not, for the same reason that people of my generation would have no idea how to drive a horse-drawn carriage or be able to transmit a telegraph message in Morse code.
So our final few years of life on this planet seem doomed to be techno-centric instead of simple. What joy awaits us.
I read this article with a great sense of sadness:
Founded in 1759 by the pioneering Josiah Wedgwood, the housewares brand quickly rose to prominence, earning fans in high places. Its elegant, often hand-painted china was used in Buckingham Palace, the White House, the Vatican, and even the Kremlin.
But fast forward to today, and once-prized porcelain pieces that were lovingly gifted at weddings, and saved for anniversaries and Christmas dinners are gathering dust, or worse, going for pennies on online marketplaces.
The sparkle has well and truly faded for the formal dining crockery, pieces that once fetched hundreds of pounds are now struggling to sell at car boot sales, with some saying they can’t even ‘give the sets away’.
Why?
Expert and prolific author on ceramics and glass, John Sandon, who makes regular appearances on the BBC Antiques Roadshow, revealed the decline in demand for traditional porcelain is less about quality and more about shifting cultural attitudes. He told the Daily Mail: “Most people consider their best china and family inherited crockery is ‘old fashioned’, whatever that means. Most old sets are regarded as impractical for everyday use, and very, very few people want to use them.”
Reflecting on changing attitudes toward inherited tableware, John noted the growing disconnect between sustainability messages and modern family preferences. He added: “The much quoted ‘Antiques are Green’ message has tried to emphasise that old china sets are the ultimate recyclables. And Granny’s china sets should be used. But most modern families don’t want to.”
Highlighting the gap between appreciation and practicality, John pointed out that admiration for antique ceramics doesn’t always translate into everyday use.
“Not using your old china tea services and fruit sets is nothing to do with the reason people choose plain white from Ikea and The Range instead of very expensive Wedgwood.”
One of my abiding regrets about emigrating was that I couldn’t bring over my (inherited) dinnerware with me. What was it?
It was Wedgwood Signet Platinum, and it was the classiest, most elegant dinnerware ever.
At dinner parties, even my rowdy, uncouth friends would comment on how lovely it looked, and how it set off the meal perfectly.
It’s profoundly sad, but not altogether surprising, that people nowadays would rather use cheap shit from Ikea or Walmart than bother to put out a decent table setting for their guests. I guess that utility wins over style and grace.
I think I’ll go and eat some worms. Off a paper plate.