WELCOME TO THE MONDAY PARTY !!!!!!
And in we dive:
And related:
And to end the thing on a brighter note:
Must be Irish, with that coloring. To continue with the Irish theme:
Tag: Humor
Stuff that makes me laugh
Quote Of The Day
From Kenny:
While I’ve never had nor wanted one, Lisa enjoys her gay coffee drinks from Starbucks, insisting on getting one every time we go to Gallatin where the nearest Starbucks is located.
Naturally it’s in a spot that’s a royal pain in the ass to get into or leave due to traffic, and to add insult to injury, they take forfuckingever to make it. I’m serious, there’s always a few cars in front of us, so we can figure on at least a 20 to 30 minute wait. It may be a shorter time if I was to park and go inside to get it, but I absolutely refuse to step inside due to liberal germs. It’s bad enough a liberal company was getting our money.
You had me at “gay coffee drinks” and “liberal germs”…
News Roundup
Speaking of fresh meat, there’s news from The Great Cultural Assimilation Project©:
...I’m thinking:
followed by: 
...and the same as above for whoever signed off on his release.
...and in other news on NPR, Hitler commits suicide.
Some SEX NEWS:
...because of course they are. Can hardly be worse than the real thing.
...or, as the old advert goes, “UNION — OUI” Of course, they’d only be messing up the Paris Olympics, so
...and the people are sad:
...and her answer is always: “I just use Scotch instead.”
...more like Dubai-on-Thames, but we’ve talked about that before.
In local news:
...and about damn time, too. However, the full court will no doubt override the panel.
#9thCircuitAreCommies.
Then from the Department of Education:
...I’m guessing because that if he could, he’d be too old for her.
...I can’t decide whether “witch” is more objectionable than “genderqueer”. Taken together, of course, there should be a hanging. Of whichever school official thought this was a neat idea.
Time for some EVERYBODY PANIC!!!! News:
...note: “could”. Or… “probably won’t”.
#WeaselWordAlert
And for some totally 
...not Salma Hayek? Then nobody cares, honey.
And in our stroll down 
:
...did somebody say “LINGERIE”???
And that’s the news covered.
Caption Competition #342
Your suggestions in Comments.
Why Rejuvenation?
Here’s one that got me thinking:
Scientists have found ancient [herpes] viruses locked inside Neanderthal bones that are 50,000 years old — and experts could be set to recreate them. The team who made the discovery now plan to try and synthesize these viruses to see how they compare to modern ones.
Clearly, the modern, largely-incurable herpes viruses aren’t enough for us to deal with.
Okay, let’s have them explain themselves:
“These Jurassic Park-like viruses could then be studied for their reproductive and pathogenic traits and compared to present-day counterparts.”
Actually, no. The last fucking thing we need is to find out how they reproduced themselves. Why? Because once we do, the shit will be able to reproduce itself.
Wuhan, anyone?
The hell with that. I’m very supportive of Scientific Curiosity and all that, but sometimes you just have to draw the line.
And frankly, if we’re going to bring old stuff back to life, what’s wrong with resurrecting the mid-1950-era Mercedes 300 SC?
They could be made in all pretty colors, with- or without soft tops, etc., etc.
Oh wait, I forgot: that’s engineering, not !Science!
Still, I put it to my Readers that having the world flooded with fine 300 SCs would be far more beneficial to life than doing the same with a 50,000-year-old pox.
Feel free to propose other extinct things you’d like to bring back to the modern world; but I have to warn y’all, I got fibs on crucifixion.
Quote Of The Day
From SOTI, talking about the recent Eurovision Song Contest:
The Palestinians sent a contestant, but the timer went off early and they were no longer available.
