Category: Funny Stuff

News Roundup

Bad News, Funny Stuff

1)  Eating beaver is an aphrodisiac, Polish minister claims — why yes, yes it is.

2)  Instagram crashes AGAIN: Users around the world hit by outage, leaving them unable to login or load the app — First World problem

3)  Indian man is killed in fight to the death over WATER — Third World problem

4)  Man is run over (twice) and is robbed while lying at the side of the road — just wasn’t his day, was it?  

5)  After a $1 million restoration, historic ship collides with container ship and sinks — wasn’t their day, either.

6)  Man Guarding Miners From Pride Of 14 Lions Is Killed — By An Elephant — Africa Wins Again.

And to end the carnage:

7)  Some stupid bitch screams abuse at a Trump supporter, loses her job as a consequence — and as sure as night follows day, some asswipe takes umbrage because Oh My We’re Better Than That, not realizing that unless we continue to use the Left’s own rules against them, they’re going to not only carry on being assholes, but get worse.

Screw them both, the Left and the Appeasers.  There are consequences for acting like an asshole, and it’s time the Left experienced that.

Auctions vs. Pleasure

Business, Funny Stuff, Men & Women

It’s not often that a newspaper story leaves me convulsed with laughter, but this one did:

Red-faced auction house chiefs are forced to look for a new venue after bidders are put off by ‘screams of pleasure’ coming from swingers club upstairs

You have to read the whole thing to get the full Monty, so to speak, but I started giggling just at the thought of a staid-looking commercial building inside which both of these are going on simultaneously:

Yeah I know, I’m a sick and twisted man… and don’t even get me started on “Greedy Ladies Day”.

Cutting Humor

Funny Stuff, Mocking Furriners

Ol’ Diogenes has a little fun at the expense of the Brits:

Here in America we worry about democrats trying to take away our 2nd Amendment right to keep and bear arms. Over in England, Royal subjects are not allowed to have guns so Brits run around stabbing each other, which prompted the government to take away knife ownership rights. Naturally British thugs have to move on to carrying something else lethal.

Or, as we put it:

That’s a badass-lookin’ Bowie, by the way, although I prefer my Fox (with 1911 to give the proper proportion of the thing):

One wonders what the Regents Park Plod would make of that?  (Oh, and I have no rusty spoons in my possession, so I’d be okay — see link for explanation.)