Category: Friday Feature

5 Worst Young Adult Fiction Novels

Friday Feature, The Worst

Some names may have been changed slightly because lawyers, who have fuck-all sense of humor when it comes to satire.

  • “Threesomes! The Hardy Boys And Nancy Drew Compendium”
  • “Harry Potter And The Half-Price Hooker” by J.K. (Just Kidding) Rowlins
  • “Little Whore-House On The Prairie” by Laura Tingles Wilder
  • “Little Women: Sex With Dwarves” by Louisa May Allcock
  • “The Princess Bridegroom (an LGBT mystery)” by Willyum Old Man

Your suggestions in Comments.

 

 

5 Worst Drinks To Get Drunk On

Friday Feature, The Worst

I’m not interested in stupid drinks like “cognac & gin”, home-brewed or -distilled nastiness, insane mixtures like “tequila & drain cleaner” or similar nonsense. I’m talking about regular bar drinks that, when drunk in very large quantities, make your mouth feel like the inside of Andrea Dworkin’s sneaker when you wake up the next morning. In order of increasing hideousness (and please don’t ask me how I know all this):

Note that so foul are these Terrible Five that tequila doesn’t even come close to making the list, although that Greek Pine-Sol-flavored wine retsina gets an honorable mention.

Your own suggestions in Comments, as usual.

5 Worst Things To Hear Over An Airliner’s P.A. System

Friday Feature, The Worst

Ranked in order of awfulness:

  • “This is Captain Douglas Corrigan speaking. I don’t know where y’all were expecting to land, but this ain’t it.”*
  • “Ladies and gentlemen, please be aware that this aircraft can fly quite well on only one engine.”
  • “Wait… Hank, I thought you checked the fuel levels before we took off.”
  • “Passenger Mohammed Al-Bomba, please identify yourself to a cabin crew member.”
  • “Welcome to Bangalore International Airport.”

Your suggestions in Comments. Bonus points if you actually heard them on a flight…

*do a search on the name.