Further Explanation Needed

In this little story, the question being asked is:  “How could this happen?”

“This” being this:

To me, the answer seems quite simple:  the Audi used the McLaren as a ramp — or a partial ramp, mounting it with only the right-hand wheels, which caused it to flip over onto its side.  (The low-profile front of the McLaren, by the way, seems to make for quite an effective ramp.)

The real question is:  what would make the Audi’s driver go so fast in a supermarket parking lot as to turn a simple collision into a flip-over?  Trying to get into the vacant spot next to the McLaren ahead of another car?  Hitting the throttle instead of the brake pedal?  Sexting on the iPhone?  All of the above?

Truly, some people should not be allowed to drive on public roads.

News Roundup

New reports which do not include Mazy Hirono or similar filth.


probably the same way we reacted when Obama won:  riots, demonstrations, burning buildings, mass protest marches, vitriol, death threats… oh, wait a moment.  That was the Left , when Trump wonNever mind.


I’ll take “Fuck off, Boris” for $400, Alex.


who are you and what have you done with Mitt Romney?


oh, there he is.  Never mind.


I’ll take “A Brick” for $5, Alex.


and for the win, I’ll take “Fuck Off, Doctor Doolittle” for $400, Alex.


sadly, it won’t be because most of them are dangling from trees and lamp posts.


and if you don’t laugh like a Darwin-drenched crazed hyena at the details, I don’t wanna talk to you no more.


loath as I normally am to follow the Euros’ lead, I’d make an exception here.


she must look better in a dimly-lit bedroom;  otherwise this is inexplicable, even for a horny 17-y/o.


wait a second, let me fix that quickly:


…there ya go.


well, it kinda depends on the choices, e.g.:

Finally, to end this on a happier note, and for those who wanted to see more Kelly Brook, here she is (link in pic):

Yer welcome.

No More Bill

I see with great regret that the peerless travel writer Bill Bryson is closing up his inkwell for good.

In an age when cheap airfares and package tours — not to mention online “visits” through media such as Gurgle maps and InstaGram — could have made travel writing about as relevant as toenail clippings, Bryson’s refreshing, no-nonsense style has defied the trend.

I first encountered the man through his Lost Continent: Travels In Small-Town America.   I found in Bryson a kindred soul because at the time, Longtime Buddy Trevor Romain and I were doing very much the same thing, albeit on a smaller scale:  once a year we would take a long weekend off work, pick a part of the U.S. that we’d never visited before, and fly in (he from Austin and I, at that time, from Chicago).  Then we’d rent a car and set off, destination unknown and only the return flight’s departure time as a deadline.  The Golden Rule:  No Interstate Highways.  Even major U.S. roads with only two digits (e.g. U.S. 30 or Route 66) were treated with suspicion, and we’d get off into the back country roads with alacrity.

We were often asked why we did this — and we did it for nearly a decade — and our reply was simple.  We did it to remind ourselves why we had both left our country of birth and settled in this new, this wonderful and this dauntingly-large and diverse land.

To say that we met interesting people would rank among the great understatements of the century:  in New Orleans, Queer Tom and Opera Kate (an out-of-work opera singer working as a barmaid);  the lady in a little town outside Portland who collected frogs of all descriptions (stuffed, porcelain, wooden, whatever) and displayed them all in her restaurant;  the huge guy in New Hampshire who, when we asked him if he’d ever played football lisped:  “Nope.  I got weak kneeth”;  and the slightly-batty breakfast diner owner in Rhode Island who wore the most eccentric earrings we’d ever seen, a different pair every single day;  these, and many, many others were encountered in our travels, and gave us both dinner-party conversation topics and “Remember when?” reminiscences that survive to this day.

And during every single trip, Trevor and I fell in love with America all over again.

So when reading Bill Bryson’s books, it was like reading about one of our own “Blue Highways” trips (the name taken from the title of William Least Heat Moon’s book of the same ilk).  And when Bryson settled in Britishland, it gave rise to works like the astonishing The Road To Little Dribbling  and Notes From A Small Island  — books which, because I’d been to the U.K. often myself, made me nod my head because I too had been to Little Dribbling, only it was called Upton-Under-Wold, Thirsk or Lesser Foldem.

I cannot recommend his work highly enough, because he is an extraordinary writer who sees everything through a pair of clear-sighted lenses and not rose-tinted ones.  Never one to suffer fools or stupid things, he still talks about them with affection covered by incredulity.  If you’re looking for a reading project for the winter, you could do a lot worse than read everything Bill Bryson has ever written.

And Bill:  good for you.  While I am distraught at your retirement, I am forever grateful to you and your wonderful works.

As to why he’s getting out:

“I would quite like to spend the part that is left to me doing all the things I’ve not been able to do. Like enjoying my family, I have masses of grandchildren and I would love to spend more time with them just down on the floor.”

I can think of no better reason.  Give them each a hug from me.

News Roundup

None of the news that’s fit to print.


welcome to our world, Limey bastards.


pretty much the same as you’d get if your taxes were super low, only you’d have more money in your pocket.


so in other words:  it’s just like influenza and the common cold, is it?


I have an abiding wish that we were actually as bad as they say we are.  Wouldn’t we have fun?  Instead, we’re law-abiding, vote and have jobs, which prevent us all from cutting their throats.


so theft is okay, as long as only a few people are affected?  Got it.


it’s called the “grasping at straws” tactic.


couldn’t happen to a nicer Socialist.


he could pick the Tooth Fairy as his AG:  still not gonna happen.


could we import a few of these judges into the U.S.?  They have a better idea of freedom than most of ours.  And they speak Spanish, and everything.


Mommy, why were all the boys following me around the playground?


it’s a strange way to say, “I haven’t had a man inside me for six months and I’m starting to ache”, but whatever.


somebody remind me of all those arguments against the death penalty.

And just to show that it’s not all bad news:

No need to thank me, it’s all part of the service etc. etc.

News Roundup

Here We Go Again, with acerbic commentary that will make your lips scrunch up like Nancy Pelosi eating a lemon.


turned right instead of left at Damascus, and there he was.


I think this is the first SC judge I’ve may actually have fallen in love with.


ummm no, actual structural racism was in one of your nation’s former colonies, Ginger — that being South Africa — and it was called apartheid Everything else is just a pale shadow.


the only news in this is that the dad was arrested.  Apparently the Australian rozzers want to keep all the paedo-punching for themselves.


and note how the headline puts “de-arrest” in quotes, but not around “woman”.  And speaking of weirdos:


yup.  Hoofbeats are definitely getting louder.


a Democrat lying about gun control?  In other news, polar bears eat seals, sun rises in east, etc.


“pure evil”?  I can think of better examples, quite frankly.  And if “rape” is defined as “sexual intercourse without consent”, how can this be called rape?  Asking for a friend.


not reported:  whether any pins were involved.  (Yeah, he was a sperm donor.)


I think I may have responded “Oh God, yes” to this one.

And finally:

Mrs. Crouch shows off her nipples.  Not that this is news, or anything, but it was a slow weekend.

King Midas In Reverse

No, not the awful Graham Nash song.  This is a clear and concise look at how the Left has turned everything it touched — and eventually controlled — into shit.

The hard Left believes its mission is so critical, so morally superior, that all means can be justified to achieve its noble ends. And so almost every institution that the Left has in its line of vision is now petrifying.

Of course, Victor Davis Hanson is too much of a gentleman to say what I said, bless him.  But “petrified” means “turned to stone” (hence his title of the article), and academia, Hollywood, urban centers, sports and the military’s leadership have not been thus transformed.  Turned into stone — at any stage before, say, 2002 would have been fine;  but now it’s all gone to shit, and we have the Left to thank for it.

Read the whole thing.