Train Smash Down Under

It’s very tempting for me to disqualify all Australian women from Train Smashdom because, well, because Australian.

However, then we’d not be able to feast our eyes on displays such as this year’s Australia Day celebrations:

Of course, this being the modern era, people found something to complain about the event, and they looked pretty much as you’d expect them to look:

…but who cares?  Not these folks:

Which just goes to show that not all women Down Under are Train Smash Women.

Happy Australia Day, Over There!!!


  1. How can you tell you’re in Australia? Your bikini top is upside down (pic six)

    Not that I’m sick with envy AT ALL.

  2. the upside down bikini top trend is goofy.

    WTF is that creature on the left in the first picture!! Looks like a desk in detention hall covered in graffiti!!! Yes, I know, tattoos show that you’re a creative and deep individual and they all have special meaning. Rarely have I seen a beautiful woman and thought, you know, she’d look a lot better if she had a huge tattoo. something small or discrete isn’t bad but quite a few people are excessive. Oh well, off to find the eye bleach


    1. +1 here. Not a tattoo fan at all. Kids once asked me, “Would you mind if I got a tattoo of you as a memorial?” My response was, “A better Memorial would be for you to save your money, and not ugly yourself up.”

      1. you’re right. I’d like to get a tattoo. I have a design I’d like and a location but I just can’t bring myself to pony up the cost. If I bought a piece of art for the wall or a sculpture, at least it could be sold for part of or more than the initial cost.

        If someone wants a memorial of me, put up a headstone or buy something that makes you think of me.


        1. I haven’t thought of anything I would want on/in my body forever (plus six months). I hate wearing the same color shirt or tie two days in a row!

    2. That first photo, by itself, nearly had me vomiting in disgust.

      Pro Tip for Young Women: The tattooist is NOT your friend. These days, NOT being tattooed makes you stand out – in a Very Good Way. It’s a statement of higher class – and demands neither sweating, nor starving, nor spending. It’s the best deal you’re going to get. Take it.

    3. Agreed. It seems a shame, to smear graffti by Rat-bike Joe in a shoppe on 2nd Avenue, all over one of the Lord’s most beautiful creations.

  3. Apparently the Aussie extended Gestapo Covid lockdowns have had a deleterious effect to the mass of the masses.

  4. Geezus! That’s some nasty shit right there.
    I don’t think that even qualifies to be good enough to be called “Train Smash”
    Most of those “ladies” look more like “Demolition Derby”

  5. After examining Portrait One, I ‘opened a dialogue’ with my various versions of friends, family, neighbors, visitors from distant galaxies.
    Our enthusiastic conclusion is unanimous — as a ‘show of solidarity’, we are all doing multiple ‘scorpion’ tattoos across our chests.
    Using disassembled components of ball-point pens.
    While intoxicated.
    In the dark.

  6. The tattooed wonder in pic one doesn’t bother me one iota. While she wouldn’t be my first choice for a partner, would you rather someone inked up who could suck a golf ball through 50 feet of garden hose, is loyal and loving, and challenges you to top her 75 yard groupings at the range, or a high-society drop-dead perfect-10 who’s an ice queen and rapes your bank account to buy trinkets and trifles, then takes you to the cleaners and runs off with your best mate.

    The second pic….I think I just threw up a little in my mouth. As for the third pic, I don’t see anything worthy of scorn or derision. Normal young folks out enjoying themselves in a not particularly distasteful manner. I’d have fit right in myself in my yoot. Nothing train-smashy there.

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