Next To Go

Here’s a fun exercise:

Fallen crypto guru Sam Bankman-Fried is likely to be placed on suicide watch when moved to a tiny cell in his hellhole jail in the Bahamas.

The former CEO of collapsed currency exchange FTX – who takes medication for depression – remains under evaluation in the maximum security sickbay and is expected to be there until the end of next week.

His next move inside notorious His Majesty’s Prison Fox Hill will be decided by the jail’s Classification Board and a medical assessment.

Ordinarily, this would be a post about his impending “suicide” — — but this skulduggery is of the Ponzi kind, and nothing to do with the Clinton Foundation, so all we have to think about is this pudgy little asshole doing away with himself out of self-pity.

Frankly, given that he’s a vegan and future inmate, there’s not much reason for him to live, so he might as well.

One of the “side benefits” of being old is that one spends a lot of time in waiting-rooms — in this case, at Discount Tires — where I happened upon the Aug/Sep issue of Forbes magazine which had an interview with the above asshole (long before his financial criminality and -irresponsibility became well known, of course).

I read the interview, which spent a lot of time looking at all FTX’s acquisitions and share purchases, and I thought (not with hindsight, but as a contemporaneous reader):

“Where the hell are you getting all your investment capital from?”

FTX was either leveraged to the hilt — couldn’t be, because he was paying out mouthwatering returns to his investors — or he was playing the old Bernie Maddow game of using fresh investor money to pay out earlier investors.  Certainly, he wasn’t getting anything like dividends from flaccid blockchain exchanges or collapsing software companies — his favored purchase targets, so the money had to be coming from new investors.

What suckers.  It’s even worse when you learn that some of his new (and earlier) investors were not individuals, but institutional.  Don’t these places have any safety controls or risk-assessment checks?

I am not a nihilist by any stretch, but I swear there are times when I want the whole fucking house of cards to collapse, rich people / institutions to be impoverished, and crowds of the now-desperately-poor (that would be people like me) roaming the streets with shotguns and AK-47s, shooting these bastards as they walk out of their office buildings, or using their plummeting bodies as skeet targets as they try to escape the shame and ruin that has ensued from their greed, mendacity and foolishness.

No doubt someone will have a problem with this scenario.

7 comments

  1. “…using their plummeting bodies as skeet targets…”
    ======
    Give this man a ceegar!
    Even I have never thought of such a diabolical hobby before.
    Where my 12 ga iz?

  2. re — strangling them in their sleep
    .
    I wonder about their security crews.
    What percentage are on-the-edge of thinking ‘this gig is not worth the aggregation’… ninety-nine percent?
    I bet the number is closer to ‘all of us’.
    .
    At what point does 76,000,000 real living people ‘down-vote’ 82,000,000 imaginary fictional make-believe ‘supporters’.
    At what point does the ‘created to be this broken’ system get atomized into oblivion.
    .
    In my experience, the metaphysical axiom ‘thoughts create’ is true.
    Freedom Lovers are creating our next reality, and it has no space for the BOLSHEVIKS.
    The BOLSHEVIKS probably should get prepared to be nothing… as in ‘do not exist’.

  3. A substantial portion of those funds went to politicians in the last election cycle. His ” Superpac” was the #2 donor to the Democrat Party plus a few dollars to Rinos just to be fair, so he may feel protected. But I suspect it only makes him more of a candidate for Arckancide.

  4. He was absconding with investor’s money and replacing it with his own limitless token currency at a made-up “market” value. As if American Airlines suddenly valued their business at $1 Jillion based on their ability to issue and hold limitless airline miles.

    He spent investor’s money to fund his lavish lifestyle, gamble on crypto, write himself “loans”, and donate to Democrats. Yields were all on paper and any cash payments were made with loans from other crypto firms, or from future investors (Ponzi-style).

    But he’d have you believe he simply mismanaged people’s money and didn’t realize that unlimited promised “airline miles” are essentially worthless.

  5. If “The Reckoning” winds up looking more like “The Purge” I can’t say I’d be too disappointed.
    I just want to be in the Remnant Regiment that tracks down the dirty lawyers/lobbyists/politicians.

    Strictly fantasy, not projecting or anything (apropos of nothing, how many mags is too many?).

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