FFS:
Let’s not. Everyone in the world knows about fucking breast cancer. Stop clogging up my mailbox.
Also, it’s nearly the end of the month (October 24, when I received it), so you’re late (amongst all your other stupidities).
Latest Posts
Common Thread
Here are some headlines, all talking about the same thing. See if you can guess what it is (no links):
Of course, there’s always someone who missed the memo:
Yeah, that makes sense: cutting production of gas-powered cars to concentrate on EVs… when all signs point to growing consumer rejection of the latter. Nice one, Ford:
…when you should, in the words of some famous guy, just keep on truckin’.
Without the Lightning.
“Quick, Martha…”
“…hand me mah smellin’ salts!” From KrautPres / Reichkanzler Olaf Scholz comes this little bombshell:
“We must finally deport on a large scale those who have no right to stay in Germany.“
I’ll believe it when I see it, but you have to admit, it’s a first from any post-Mutti Merkel politician.
And in the same article, from Swissland:
Switzerland moved rightwards in an election on Sunday, giving the right-wing Swiss People’s Party (SVP) more seats in parliament as concerns about rising immigration outweighed those about the environment, final results showed on Monday.
Wait… the Green Nude Eel is starting to lose favor with, of all people, the Swiss? And “concerns about immigration”? Anyone would think that Swiss cities like Zurich have seen a massive increase in violent crime, mostly committed by “immigrants” of the Afro-Arab persuasion.
Oh, wait… they have.
News Roundup
Excuse me for a minute… [Pavlovian response]
Now on with the news, starting with the Great Cultural Assimilation Project:
...yet another triumph of Biden’s immigration policy.
...not in Nashville.
...we need to see more of this, all over the world.
And onto the great Palestinian Fuckup Fallout:
...Hamas: continuing Obama’s legacy to the gun industry.
...the Izzies must be losing their touch.
...when asked to point out Israel on a map, the senator said: “Aarghlpaptmpofftry”.
And on to Sex News:
...and nobody saw this one coming. [eyecross]
...confirming once and for all that yes, Bill Clinton was definitely on Epstein’s Client List.
...I didn’t even know that women were in the fencing business. [sic]
In Pre-Election News:
...enough of that stuff, Donald: you already have my vote.
...no no, you lesbo freak, you’ve got it all wrong, as usual. Trump doesn’t want to execute you; but I could think of several others who might be tempted.
#Fifth Amendment #BuyMoreAmmo
And Great Moments In Parenting:
...I dunno; sounds quite reasonable.
Then there’s this:
...not ordering the execution of Simon Cowell for Crimes Against Music?
And now, in INSIGNIFICA:
...so much for that “working-class punk” thing.
...nah, just kidding. Here’s Liz Hurley:
A much better way to end the news, yes?
Bad Behavior
Back when I was still on the dating scene (shortly after someone discovered fire), I was thankfully spared the prospect of my date behaving badly by being glued to her cell phone during the meal. (Back then, I didn’t even have a landline phone because the phone company — in South Africa, the Post Office — had a three-month backlog on new home phone installations.)
However, that was then and this is now. Here’s what one guy did when faced with such a situation:
A man has caused a debate after admitting to walking out on a date without paying his portion of an $80 bill because his potential love interest was ‘constantly on her phone’. The man, who is from a major US city, revealed he met up with the woman after matching on a dating app. The pair hit it off and decided to meet in person.
The man was quick to brand the woman as a ‘vapid moral monstrosity’ who had the ‘attention span of a gnat’, after she spent a whole five minutes ferociously texting as they waited for their food.
When they finally began to chat she was quick to, yet again, start answering her ‘buzzing’ phone . The man attempted to make a few hints to his date about her antisocial behavior by joking and even saying he would throw the phone out of the window if it continued. However, his incessant hints fell on deaf ears as her eyes continued to be glued to her phone screen.
An appetizer and two drinks later, the man realized he was miserable and there was no possible way to turn this date around. He headed to the toilet, promising himself that if her eyes were still locked on her phone screen, then he would be making a swift exit out of the door.
When he came out to find her eyes fixed fixed on the screen, he validated that promise by quickly leaving. He detailed: “I looked the other way and there was a service door open behind the kitchen. I turned right instead of left and exited into the sweet, sweet air of freedom.”
And here’s the kicker:
It was only 30 minutes after he had left that the date even realized his absence, texting him: “Did you leave?”
Good for him. I’m even glad that she got stuck with the tab, because having such appalling manners deserves to be punished.
I don’t even know why there would be a “debate” on the topic.
Too Much Hyperbole
This kind of thing gets up my nose — not the action itself, but the description thereof:
Lewis Capaldi has been praised for his heroic actions after rushing to help an elderly woman who had collapsed on Hampstead Heath in north London.
The singer, 27, was out with friends on the heath when he spotted the woman lying on the ground before dashing to her aid on Wednesday.
Onlookers in the area revealed that Lewis called the emergency services and stayed with her until they arrived to help.
Were his actions praiseworthy? Of course — but then again good grief, what kind of person would leave an old woman lying on the ground, in obvious distress?
But “heroic”? I don’ theenk so, Simon.
Had the old lady been attacked by three “teenagers” and Capaldi stepped in to help her: yes, now that’s heroic.
But just rendering assistance? That falls under “doing the right thing” and “civic duty”.
Headline hyperbole: I fucking hate it.