Oops

The story of the film so far:  you’re the 65-year-old pastor of a Christian congregation, and one day you decide to admit to everyone that a couple of decades back, you were a very bad boy and had an extramarital affair.  All the congregation rises, and you get a standing ovation for your honesty, humility and courage, etc. etc. amen.

Then this happens:

The woman with whom he had conducted the affair ascended the stage, saying the pastor had slept with her when he was 38 and she was 16.

Whoa.  It takes a lot to make my jaw drop nowadays, but this one did.

RFI:  is there a statute of limitations on statutory rape?

Food Roulette

Apparently, Jif Peanut Butter has been “recalled” by its parent company (who knew?):

The J. M. Smucker Co. is recalling select Jif® peanut butter products sold in the U.S. due to potential Salmonella contamination. Salmonella is an organism which can cause serious and sometimes fatal infections in young children, frail or elderly people, and others with weakened immune systems. Healthy persons infected with Salmonella often experience fever, diarrhea (which may be bloody), nausea, vomiting and abdominal pain. In rare circumstances, infection with Salmonella can result in the organism getting into the bloodstream and producing more severe illnesses such as arterial infections (i.e., infected aneurysms), endocarditis and arthritis.

The recalled peanut butter was distributed nationwide in retail stores and other outlets. Recalled products include the products below with lot codes 1274425 – 2140425. Lot codes are included alongside best-if-used-by date.

Not wanting to deal with salmonella — take it from me, I grew up in Africa, and it’s fucking wicked shit — I inspected the peanut butter supply chez  du Toit (including the emergency hoard).

Every single jar we have falls into the fucking suspect lot code range.  What’s just as interesting is that one of the jars is half-empty, i.e. New Wife and I have been feasting on the lovely stuff for about a month already on our weekend breakfast toast.  With, of course, no ill effects… so far.

Needless to say, the supermarket shelves are already empty of all Jif products, having sent them back to the manufacturer for a refund.

Now:  are said supermarket companies going to refund We The Consumers if we take our unopened jars of Jif à la salmonella  back?

Don’t be silly.  (I tried yesterday, at both Kroger and Sam’s Club and was told to fuck off.  (Not quite what was said, but the outcome was the same nevertheless.)

Maybe if I open-carried my 1911 into Tom Thumb tomorrow, they’ll at least give me a decent hearing?

Watch this space.

Ugly Wheels

Take a look at this bad boy, a 2018 Maserati Gran Turismo MC:

I see a lot of these black wheel rims these days — apparently, all the cool kids are driving them — but I have to tell you all, I think they’re pig-ugly.  Compare those with these:

…and the difference is profound, class vs. crass.  I don’t know who first came up with the black rims thing — which can turn even the exquisite GT into something foul — but they need a kick in the nads, or be flogged for crimes against automotive beauty.

Strange Choices

In a recent survey, Britishlanders were asked to state their favorite sandwiches, and the results were as follows:

For those Murkins unfamiliar with the term, a “ploughman’s” sandwich (cheese, ham, pickled onions or pickles, chutney, and sourdough bread) has nothing to do with ploughmen nor even farming — it was a marketing term developed in the late 1950s, and the promotion of the Ploughman’s lunch was part of a campaign to promote the sale of cheese in pubs.

As for the other choices:  Murkins will also be surprised by prawn sandwiches, but the Brits use the tiny “cocktail” or “baby” prawns, not the normal large things we eat with hot sauce Over Here.

And there has to be a special place in hell for whoever came up with putting tuna and sweetcorn on a sandwich.

Nosebleed And RCOB

Yesterday I went to buy someone a Dallas Cowboys cap (don’t ask), and at Academy I was just about to throw one into the shopping cart when I caught a glimpse of the price.

THIRTY FUCKING DOLLARS?  FOR A LOUSY CAP????

So back on the rack it was flung, with some force, and I was so angry I had to buy some new .45 ACP ammo to settle my nerves.  (And at just over a dollar per round for primo self-defense stuff, it wasn’t that bad or else I’d have had a stroke.)

I can sorta see how a thermal cup, for instance, could cost maybe fifteen bucks (don’t get me started about that stupid Yeti crap):  there’s a combination of materials and a little quality thrown in, and then there’s the “brand” to pay for (although the way the Cowboys have been playing recently from all accounts, they should be paying US to take their shitty merchandise).

But $30 for a common-or-garden baseball cap, made (as they all are) in China?

FOAD, America’s Team.