5 Worst Commemorative Days

In ascending order of terrible, they are:

  • International Hemorrhoid Day
  • International Vegan Day (or is that just the same as the above?)
  • Premature Ejaculation Day (I know, I know:  all ejaculations are premature)
  • Molest A Pre-Teen Girl Day (for Roman Polanski, that’s every day, of course)

and the absolute worst:

  • Senator Chuck Schumer Appreciation Day

Your suggestions in Comments, as usual.


  1. Aren’t we being a little hypocritical here? After all, you are the creator of “National Ammo Day?” Set to be on your own birthday November 19. 😉

    1. That was to stick it to Al Gore. Plus, buying ammo is a duty for us citizen-militia types.
      Your point is nevertheless valid.

  2. “National Ammo Day” is a recognized High Holy Day in Texas and it has been for years, not a fluff commemorative day like ‘Marijuana Edibles Day’ in Colorado. “National Ammo Day” is only outranked in Texas by Opening Day of Dove Season and later in November Deer Season with other huntings days slightly behind “National Ammo Day”, don’t ask me why, I don’t know and I don’t make the rules.

  3. “Premature Ejaculation Day (I know, I know: all ejaculations are premature)”

    which is traditionally celebrated the day before the calendar date.

    “Senator Chuck Schumer Appreciation Day”

    “This appreciation is usually military in nature, and carried out from their fleet of horribly beweaponed battlecruisers.”

    …..The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy

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