Stuff that makes me laugh
According to the usually-dependent Daily Mail, Oz actress Elizabeth Debicki “showed cleavage” at some show or other:
Now I don’t know much about a lot of things, but I can certainly claim to know a great deal about cleavage, having leered looked at said phenomenon at least once a day over many decades — and lemme tell y’all, that’s not a cleavage. This is a cleavage:
Standards… if we don’t keep to them, what are we left with?
Here’s some startling news from Michigan:
Greta Thunberg’s Mom Announces Run For Retiring Sen. Debbie Stabenow’s Seat
Okay, follow the link to see if I’m lying.
Sponsored by the manufacturers of:
And in similar vein:
...and they said romance was dead.
...roll on Cherry 2000, baby.
...and handed it to the cops as “evidence”. Works for me.
...because no Black man, ever, has stolen a car.
...Rolling who?
...wait, a 1.5 Richter? [laughs in Turkish]
...once again: beware round numbers. And see next week’s breathless report which will completely contradict this one.
…sorry, m’lady, but this started LONG before #MeToo.
#PussificationOfTheWesternMale.
...okay, now THAT’S funny.
From the Dept. Of Energy:
...eagles to the west of me, whales in the east, here I am stuck in the middle with you coal. [thankee, Reader terrapod]
...and predictably, all the mainstream media reports are about how the cops beat him up while getting his gun away from him.
...if they can fuck with Roald Dahl’s books, I can bowdlerize their fucking headlines.
And from the dripping files of INSIGNIFICA:
And finally, on a musical note:
…and while we’re there:
I think she’s adorable — although I’m still trying to deal with her being 48 (!!!) — and she has a brilliant (and sexy) stage act.
One of the most irritating bits of bullshit I’ve had to deal with since I came Over Here in the Great Wetback Episode Of 1986 is the (Californian) affectation of wishing everyone a good day, which along with the “smile” button never fails to set my teeth on edge.
“Have A Good Day!” is unbearably trite and superficial, not to mention facile and asinine.
Telling a shop assistant or restaurant worker to have a good day is totally stupid: how much of a good day can you possibly have when you’re serving the public? At best, you won’t be killed for forgetting to put the fries into the takeout bag.
As New Wife (who also hates the expression) pointed out to me over the weekend, it’s not just its banality but its ambition, which is unreachable.
“A whole day? That’s asking too much of the universe,” she said. “We should just wish that their next ten minutes can be disaster-free.”
And don’t even get us started on “Live long and prosper”. Talk about overreach.
We are kindred souls. Polite, but gloomily realistic.
…in which we play “Guess The Day Of The Week”:
SO:
Finally, from the Middle Finger Lady, a comparison:
I’ve mixed them up before, myself.
And just to show it isn’t ALL doom ‘n gloom, some musical chicks:
From the top: Aubrey O’Day, Dolly, Simone Simons, Una Healy.
Now sing along with me: “Hi ho, hi ho, it’s off to work we go…”